1 00:00:02,544 --> 00:00:03,921 Let's think this through. 2 00:00:04,004 --> 00:00:07,925 If we ask corporate for that, then... 3 00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:12,846 They are either gonna say yes or no. 4 00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:17,059 Michael: Could go either way. We don't know what they are going to say. 5 00:00:17,142 --> 00:00:19,311 Think it through! We have to think it through! 6 00:00:19,394 --> 00:00:22,272 Because, if they say no... 7 00:00:24,399 --> 00:00:27,152 Can we not? No... yes, we have to. You know why? 8 00:00:27,236 --> 00:00:29,214 'Cause I don't like to be cooped up in that office. 9 00:00:29,238 --> 00:00:32,032 In that box, all day long. Heisman! 10 00:00:32,115 --> 00:00:35,869 Because I need to think, okay, Jim? Oh, Kevin! 11 00:00:35,953 --> 00:00:36,954 Ooh! 12 00:00:37,955 --> 00:00:39,831 (Michael laughing) 13 00:00:41,124 --> 00:00:42,209 Nice catch. 14 00:00:42,292 --> 00:00:43,293 (Exclaiming) 15 00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:46,505 Oscar! Intercepted. 16 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:48,107 Right here. Give it to me. Sorry about that. 17 00:00:48,131 --> 00:00:50,527 Phyllis, give me the ball. Okay, give me the ball. Give me... 18 00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:51,694 Michael: You guys... oh, cool. 19 00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:53,863 Creed, give me the ball, right now. Give it to me. Ryan. 20 00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:55,305 (Shouting) 21 00:00:55,931 --> 00:00:57,182 Dwight: Fumble! 22 00:00:57,266 --> 00:00:58,600 (Grunting) 23 00:00:58,684 --> 00:01:00,102 Michael: Listen... 24 00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:03,021 All right, hey, Dwight... 25 00:01:03,772 --> 00:01:05,148 Whoa! 26 00:01:06,692 --> 00:01:07,901 Dwight: Hike. 27 00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:13,282 Michael: You all right, Ryan? Ryan? 28 00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:14,449 Yeah. 29 00:01:16,702 --> 00:01:17,786 Pam! 30 00:01:50,736 --> 00:01:54,072 Oh, they're having a sale on TiVo. 31 00:01:55,032 --> 00:01:57,159 Maybe I should get a TiVo. 32 00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:01,246 DVD burner. Maybe I should get one of those. 33 00:02:02,706 --> 00:02:04,583 You are so lucky, Jim. 34 00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:07,669 You're so lucky you don't have this problem. 35 00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:12,299 What was the ninth-place prize again? A loaf of bread? 36 00:02:13,342 --> 00:02:14,926 A cugino's pizza. 37 00:02:15,010 --> 00:02:17,804 Oh, great. Tasty, terrific pizza. 38 00:02:19,181 --> 00:02:22,476 Question: Do their pizzas play DVDs? 39 00:02:24,728 --> 00:02:27,773 Jim: Dwight was the top salesman of the year at our company. 40 00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:31,485 He wins a little prize money and gets honored at some convention. 41 00:02:32,444 --> 00:02:35,656 It is literally the highest possible honor 42 00:02:35,739 --> 00:02:38,492 that a northeastern Pennsylvania-based mid-sized paper company 43 00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:41,036 regional salesman can attain. So... 44 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:44,456 What did I do to deserve this? 45 00:02:44,539 --> 00:02:46,458 Pam: Are you sad that Dwight beat you? No. 46 00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:48,877 Are you gonna cry, Jim? Do you need a tissue? 47 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,880 Hey. I heard you got a wedding dress. Do you have pictures? 48 00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:53,131 Pam: Oh, I... yeah. 49 00:02:53,215 --> 00:02:55,008 I'll show them to you later. 50 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:57,135 Oh, I should get back. 51 00:02:58,387 --> 00:03:00,097 Talk to you guys later. Okay, cool. 52 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,932 I have a ton of stuff to do for the wedding. 53 00:03:02,099 --> 00:03:03,934 And I have to do it in the office. 54 00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:06,228 And that can be kind of awkward. 55 00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:10,857 Just because people can get all weird about wedding stuff 56 00:03:10,941 --> 00:03:13,694 and I just... I don't want to offend 57 00:03:14,611 --> 00:03:16,988 Angela or someone. 58 00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:23,245 That's what she said. 59 00:03:23,328 --> 00:03:25,372 I don't get it. 60 00:03:25,747 --> 00:03:27,332 Grapes, seductive. 61 00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:30,585 So, you ready for the big speech this afternoon? 62 00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:33,505 Well, it's not really a big speech. You're still coming, right? 63 00:03:33,588 --> 00:03:36,133 Oh, abso-fruitly. 64 00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:38,760 Fruit, grapes. Nailed the joke. Matter of time. 65 00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:41,680 And yes, it is a big speech. Biggest of your life. 66 00:03:43,682 --> 00:03:47,018 Speaker at the sales convention. Been there, done that. 67 00:03:47,102 --> 00:03:50,105 Went there again, did it again. Two years in a row. 68 00:03:51,148 --> 00:03:52,441 Consecutive. 69 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:57,904 I just... I miss the feeling of knowing that you did a good job 70 00:03:57,988 --> 00:03:59,781 because somebody gives you proof of it. 71 00:03:59,865 --> 00:04:03,243 "Sir, you're awesome. Here's a plaque. 72 00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:06,538 "What, a whole year has gone by and you need more proof? 73 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:07,831 "Here's a certificate." 74 00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:10,333 They stopped making plaques that year. 75 00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:14,671 What if I give a really long, extended thank you, for instance, 76 00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:19,468 "thank you, Mr. Blank. Thank you very, very, very..." 77 00:04:19,551 --> 00:04:22,053 That would look terrible. These are mostly salesmen, 78 00:04:22,137 --> 00:04:25,682 and salesmen expect to be entertained and you are the main act. 79 00:04:25,766 --> 00:04:29,811 When I was in the sixth grade, I was a finalist in our school spelling bee. 80 00:04:29,895 --> 00:04:31,855 It was me against raj patel. 81 00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:35,734 And I misspelled in front of the entire school 82 00:04:36,902 --> 00:04:38,403 the word "failure." 83 00:04:39,154 --> 00:04:40,489 I can't do this. 84 00:04:40,572 --> 00:04:43,909 That's because you're incapable of doing it, because you don't know how, 85 00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:45,786 because you have no skills. 86 00:04:47,078 --> 00:04:49,456 Dwight, there's no way I can possibly teach you 87 00:04:49,539 --> 00:04:52,083 what you need to know about public speaking by speech time. 88 00:04:52,167 --> 00:04:53,752 Oh, okay. 89 00:04:53,835 --> 00:04:57,130 But I can teach you enough so that you don't embarrass me or the company. 90 00:04:57,214 --> 00:05:00,008 Okay, deal. I'll do whatever you say, no questions asked. 91 00:05:00,091 --> 00:05:01,971 Well, if you have a question, you should ask me. 92 00:05:02,052 --> 00:05:03,386 Hiuyandthmk ofone.Vvhen_. 93 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:04,614 Don't try to think of a question to humor me. 94 00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:07,057 Just try not to be such an idiot. 95 00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:10,727 Is that an insult, or is that part of the public speaking advice? 96 00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:13,480 Insult. 97 00:05:15,357 --> 00:05:16,983 Pam: Mom, I'm sorry, I know you and dad 98 00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:18,127 are chipping in for the wedding 99 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:20,403 but I do not want orange invitations. 100 00:05:22,531 --> 00:05:26,034 Yes. Well, if you really want my opinion... 101 00:05:26,409 --> 00:05:28,513 Jim: Hi, yeah, can I talk to one of your travel agents? 102 00:05:28,537 --> 00:05:30,163 I'm gonna take a trip. 103 00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:34,376 I'm gonna get out of town for a while, and go some place 104 00:05:35,836 --> 00:05:37,337 not here. 105 00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:39,422 Where do I want to go? 106 00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:42,634 That is an excellent question. 107 00:05:42,968 --> 00:05:46,721 And one I probably should have thought about before I called you. 108 00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:51,643 Oscar: I get here early every morning so I can set the thermostat. 109 00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:55,814 I like it a little cooler, around 66 degrees. I'm more productive. 110 00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:59,150 Maybe some people don't like it as cold as I do. 111 00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:01,069 But I don't care. 112 00:06:01,403 --> 00:06:05,615 But seriously, what's the difference between a salesman and a saleswoman? 113 00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:06,950 A saleswoman has a vagina. 114 00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:08,793 It's a joke, Dwight, it's not a sex ed class. 115 00:06:08,827 --> 00:06:09,911 But I'm right. 116 00:06:09,995 --> 00:06:12,515 Yeah, you're right about the difference between a man and a woman, 117 00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:14,541 but not about the punch line to thejoke. All right? 118 00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:18,795 The difference between a salesman and a saleswoman is boobs. 119 00:06:19,337 --> 00:06:21,590 Hey, do you remember the speeches that you gave? 120 00:06:21,673 --> 00:06:23,008 I do, both of them. 121 00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:25,635 Could I have a copy of one of them? No, no, they would remember. 122 00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,888 Look, it doesn't matter what you say, 123 00:06:27,971 --> 00:06:30,974 it just matters that you're saying something that people care about. 124 00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:33,935 You know? All right, here we go. Watch this. 125 00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:36,479 Attention, everybody! Attention, please! 126 00:06:36,605 --> 00:06:40,650 I have some very great news from corporate. We had a wonderful quarter. 127 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:44,988 And as a result, all of you are getting bonuses for $1,000. 128 00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:47,616 Yeah! Michael: Congratulations. 129 00:06:50,493 --> 00:06:52,013 Phyllis: Unbelievable. Oscar: It's great. 130 00:06:52,037 --> 00:06:53,121 Pam: Wow. 131 00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:55,749 You see that? You see how they responded to me? 132 00:06:55,832 --> 00:06:57,876 That's amazing. In that moment, I had them. 133 00:06:57,959 --> 00:07:01,212 That is so great about the bonus. No, no, it's not true. 134 00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:04,966 I was just talking. So just go out there and say anything. 135 00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,594 They'll eat it up, they're a great audience. 136 00:07:07,677 --> 00:07:11,222 Go ahead, get the wallpaper. Wallpaper the ceiling if you want... 137 00:07:11,306 --> 00:07:14,768 Excuse me! May I have your attention, please? 138 00:07:14,851 --> 00:07:18,271 There has been an accident on 84 west. 139 00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:21,316 Cars have skidded off the road into the safety railing. 140 00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:23,151 Several cars have flipped, 141 00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:27,030 there is broken glass everywhere, several people are injured. 142 00:07:27,322 --> 00:07:29,783 Do we know anyone who was in the accident? 143 00:07:30,742 --> 00:07:32,077 Brad Pitt. 144 00:07:34,204 --> 00:07:35,914 Also, there will be no bonuses. 145 00:07:35,997 --> 00:07:38,750 Why would this affect ourbonuses? They're unrelated. 146 00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:40,043 Is Brad okay? 147 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:41,962 He will never act again. 148 00:07:42,045 --> 00:07:44,214 Also, this branch is closing. 149 00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:46,549 What the hell's going on here? Are we out ofjobs? 150 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,218 Yes. Kelly: This is Karma 151 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:50,053 because of what he did to Jennifer Aniston. 152 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:52,514 He was kidding! Dwight was kidding and I don't know why 153 00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:56,267 because it wasn't funny and it was just horrible... 154 00:07:56,935 --> 00:07:58,186 Stanley: Michael? Yeah? 155 00:07:58,269 --> 00:07:59,646 You said we were getting bonuses. 156 00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:03,483 All right, everybody in the conference room now. Let's go. Let's do it! 157 00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:04,766 Stanley: Cancel the wallpaper. 158 00:08:05,402 --> 00:08:08,571 As your leader and your friend, I sort of demand 159 00:08:08,655 --> 00:08:11,616 that you can all speak in public as I can, 160 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:15,745 and did, twice. You saw the plaque, right? 161 00:08:16,413 --> 00:08:18,331 All right, we're all gonna go around the room, 162 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:19,749 and we're going to make toasts. 163 00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:23,378 And that way, we will overcome our fear of public speaking. 164 00:08:23,461 --> 00:08:24,921 You mean toastmasters? Michael: Pam! 165 00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:27,882 I'm public speaking, stop public interrupting me! 166 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:31,803 Actually, this would be good practice for your wedding toast. 167 00:08:32,470 --> 00:08:34,889 Yeah, the bride doesn't really do... 168 00:08:34,973 --> 00:08:36,975 Have you ever been to a wedding? 169 00:08:37,308 --> 00:08:40,603 Jim: Can I go? Yes, good. Jim taking the initiative. 170 00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:45,650 So, I am going on a trip. 171 00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:49,237 But I'm not really sure where I'm going yet. It's kind of open-ended. 172 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:52,323 So, I was hoping maybe you guys would have some suggestions. 173 00:08:52,407 --> 00:08:54,075 You should go to hedonism. 174 00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:55,618 What is that? 175 00:08:55,702 --> 00:08:59,414 It's like club med, but everything is naked. 176 00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:03,877 I was thinking more like Europe or something like that, 177 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:05,420 but good second choice. 178 00:09:05,503 --> 00:09:06,796 Toby: I've been to Amsterdam. 179 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:11,051 Oh, okay, you know what? That's not a toast, you're not standing up. 180 00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:15,972 To Amsterdam. When did you go there? 181 00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:18,933 After my divorce. Jim: Really? 182 00:09:19,017 --> 00:09:20,351 Yeah. Jim: For, like, how long? 183 00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:24,064 About a week, or maybe a month. I can't... 184 00:09:24,147 --> 00:09:28,151 Jimmy, listen to me, you do not wanna go to Amsterdam, trust me. 185 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:31,321 Where do I wanna go? I'd send you to Hong Kong. 186 00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:33,364 I'd like to say hi to my friends in China. 187 00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:35,533 (Speaking in mandarin) 188 00:09:38,536 --> 00:09:40,330 Okay. Dwight, 189 00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:44,542 show us what you have learned today. 190 00:09:48,671 --> 00:09:50,757 Good morning, Vietnam! 191 00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,467 All: Oh, god. 192 00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:01,184 Okay, you know what, this isn't working, 193 00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:05,271 because I'm not nervous in front of them. They're my subordinates. 194 00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:06,856 No, we're not. 195 00:10:07,357 --> 00:10:09,984 Yes, you are. I'm assistant regional manager. 196 00:10:10,068 --> 00:10:11,569 Which means absolutely nothing. 197 00:10:11,653 --> 00:10:13,029 Michael, can you explain? 198 00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:15,907 Well, it's mostly made up. So... 199 00:10:16,574 --> 00:10:18,677 Michael: Dwight is not going to do a good job. It's sad. 200 00:10:18,701 --> 00:10:21,341 And they're expecting excellence, because I did do such a good job. 201 00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:23,581 Two years in a row, I killed. Itwas amazing. 202 00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:27,210 Confidence, Dwight! 203 00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:33,466 Dwight. 204 00:10:33,842 --> 00:10:36,237 If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go? 205 00:10:36,261 --> 00:10:38,138 I can travel anywhere except Cuba, 206 00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:40,557 and I will travel to New Zealand 207 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,559 and walk the lord of the rings trail to mordor, 208 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:44,310 and then I will hike mount doom. 209 00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:46,479 So now, just leave me alone. 210 00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:48,690 Okay. I was just trying to get some advice on my trip. 211 00:10:48,773 --> 00:10:51,484 Oh, please. You're not taking any trip. 212 00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:59,701 You know, I majored in public speaking in college. 213 00:10:59,784 --> 00:11:01,161 Mmm-hmm. You did? 214 00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:03,180 And the first thing that they teach you is that 215 00:11:03,204 --> 00:11:05,832 you've gotta be true to yourself. 216 00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:08,251 And you are all about authority. 217 00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:10,753 Yes. I am. 218 00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:14,340 The great speakers throughout history were notjoke tellers, 219 00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:16,176 they were people of passion. 220 00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:18,678 So, if you wanna do well today, you gotta do what they did. 221 00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:19,846 Which is? 222 00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:24,517 You've gotta wave your arms, and you've gotta pound your fists many times. 223 00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:27,163 You're supposed to emphasize your point. 224 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:30,023 Okay, I didn't actually major in public speaking. 225 00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:33,776 But I did download speeches from some of history's famous dictators. 226 00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:37,614 Like this one, originally given by Benito Mussolini. 227 00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:41,367 Okay, look, I know you're giving this speech on your own, 228 00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:42,761 but I wrote up a few talking points 229 00:11:42,785 --> 00:11:44,954 for you to take a look at. I hope you don't mind. 230 00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:46,414 I'll glance at it. 231 00:11:47,916 --> 00:11:50,418 It's time, Dwight, the grim reaper is here. 232 00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:55,465 The very best of luck to you, Dwight. 233 00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,550 Thank you, Angela. 234 00:12:04,349 --> 00:12:06,768 Why'd you pick the va. For the reception? 235 00:12:06,851 --> 00:12:09,938 Roy has a connection. It's nicer than you think. 236 00:12:12,023 --> 00:12:15,610 You're inviting Jim? Of course, he's one of my closest friends. 237 00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,280 Dwight: All right. 238 00:12:20,365 --> 00:12:22,367 You ready? Here we go. 239 00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:30,917 Wow. It's a little bit bigger than I remember. 240 00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:34,587 Michael: Come on. We're down here in the front. 241 00:12:44,931 --> 00:12:46,808 You all ready for this? 242 00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:48,851 (Dance music playing) 243 00:12:57,652 --> 00:13:00,154 I am just feeling under the weather, 244 00:13:00,363 --> 00:13:03,825 and I think that I will go home and rest. 245 00:13:03,908 --> 00:13:06,577 I've never, ever seen you take a sick day. 246 00:13:06,661 --> 00:13:09,497 Well, I've seen you take enough for the both of us. 247 00:13:10,331 --> 00:13:12,041 Next, I'd like to introduce 248 00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:15,295 the dunder Mifflin salesman of the year, 249 00:13:15,378 --> 00:13:17,130 Dwight schrute! 250 00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:24,929 (Whispering) Dwight, they called your name. 251 00:13:25,013 --> 00:13:26,514 Dwight, how we doing? 252 00:13:26,848 --> 00:13:29,017 No. I can't. Okay, you know what? 253 00:13:29,100 --> 00:13:31,936 I can't. You know what? Okay no, no problem. 254 00:13:32,020 --> 00:13:34,397 You are lucky you have me here. I'm going to cover for you. 255 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:35,732 All right! 256 00:13:42,196 --> 00:13:46,868 Good morning, Vietnam! 257 00:13:49,912 --> 00:13:53,916 I am not Dwight schrute, not at all. 258 00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:58,296 I am Michael Scott, his mentor and boss. 259 00:13:58,629 --> 00:14:02,633 And until Dwight comes up, if he ever does, 260 00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:07,263 I wanted to say a few words about excellence. 261 00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:08,681 What makes 262 00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:12,018 a work environment excellent? 263 00:14:12,435 --> 00:14:16,105 Well, there are many things, I believe, 264 00:14:16,189 --> 00:14:19,609 that do such a thing of that nature. 265 00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:24,155 And one would be humor. 266 00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:28,451 What is the difference between a salesman 267 00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:30,119 and a saleswoman? 268 00:14:39,420 --> 00:14:41,506 I always set it at 69. 269 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:45,718 Maybe we'll use a dj. 270 00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:48,238 That's the one thing Roy is in charge of for this wedding, 271 00:14:48,262 --> 00:14:50,556 but all he's managed to do is set a date. 272 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:53,601 But he did a great job. June 10th is perfect. 273 00:14:53,684 --> 00:14:56,312 I want a June wedding. I've always wanted one. 274 00:14:57,146 --> 00:15:00,149 Ryan, do you know when you would want to get married? 275 00:15:00,483 --> 00:15:03,444 Actually, I don't see ever getting married. 276 00:15:11,953 --> 00:15:14,705 Ryan, you should be more sensitive. It's obvious she likes you 277 00:15:14,789 --> 00:15:18,042 and comments like that, they just... I know what I said. 278 00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:22,171 I'm very sorry, I did not know that you were wearing a hearing aid, 279 00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:25,591 and I just thought you were speaking abnormally. 280 00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:31,889 And now, the black guy from the police academy movies, 281 00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:34,225 a robot. 282 00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:37,103 (Mimicking robot) 283 00:15:39,147 --> 00:15:41,566 Michael winslow. Anyone? 284 00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:43,985 Car starting. 285 00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:46,195 (Mimicking car engine rewing) 286 00:15:48,573 --> 00:15:50,741 All right, Dwight schrute, everyone. 287 00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:54,370 Good luck, that is a tough crowd. 288 00:15:58,416 --> 00:16:00,251 (Breathing heavily) 289 00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:07,800 (Dwight clearing throat) 290 00:16:11,512 --> 00:16:14,724 Blood alone moves the wheels of history! 291 00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:20,480 Have you ever asked yourselves in an hour of meditation, 292 00:16:20,563 --> 00:16:23,357 which everyone finds during the day, 293 00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:27,487 how long we have been striving for greatness? 294 00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:33,409 Not only the years we've been at war, the war of work, 295 00:16:34,202 --> 00:16:37,079 but from the moment, as a child, 296 00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:40,917 when we realized that the world could be conquered. 297 00:16:42,043 --> 00:16:46,714 It has been a lifetime struggle, a never-ending fight! 298 00:16:46,797 --> 00:16:50,092 I say to you, and you will understand, 299 00:16:50,176 --> 00:16:53,262 that it is a privilege to fight! 300 00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:01,812 We are warriors! 301 00:17:06,484 --> 00:17:10,446 Salesmen of northeastern Pennsylvania, 1 ask you, 302 00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:14,742 once more rise and be worthy of this historical hour! 303 00:17:20,873 --> 00:17:22,750 Yeah! Yeah! 304 00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:27,046 I've got a timeshare in key west that might be available. 305 00:17:28,172 --> 00:17:30,174 Maybe. Thanks. 306 00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:31,818 You really think you're gonna go? 307 00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:33,135 Yeah, I'm definitely going. 308 00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:35,680 Nice. Send me a postcard. 309 00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:37,866 Ryan: Jim has worked at the same place for five years. 310 00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:41,310 Jim eats the same ham and cheese sandwich every day for lunch. 311 00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:43,437 I don't know, if I were a betting man, I'd say 312 00:17:43,521 --> 00:17:46,190 he will have a fun weekend in Philadelphia. 313 00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:57,118 No revolution is worth anything unless it can defend itself! 314 00:18:01,372 --> 00:18:04,834 Dwight: Some people will tell you "salesman" is a bad word. 315 00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,336 They'll conjure up images 316 00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:11,507 of used car dealers and door-to-door charlatans. 317 00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:15,136 This is our duty to change their perception. 318 00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:18,598 I say, salesmen 319 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:23,060 and women of the world, unite! 320 00:18:23,603 --> 00:18:27,815 We must never acquiesce, for it is together... 321 00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:31,902 Together that we prevail! 322 00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:36,115 We must never cede control of the motherland! 323 00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:38,534 For it is... 324 00:18:38,618 --> 00:18:42,538 All: Together that we prevail! 325 00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:55,968 Australia? I have always wanted to go there. 326 00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:58,471 I'm going. I'm a little nervous to run into Dwight 327 00:18:58,554 --> 00:19:00,014 on his connecting flight to mordor, 328 00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:04,935 but, other than that... yeah, I bought the ticket, non-refundable. 329 00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:06,771 That's awesome. Where are you staying? 330 00:19:06,854 --> 00:19:08,064 I don't know. 331 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:10,787 I feel like I have plenty of time to figure out the details, but... 332 00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:12,401 When are you leaving? 333 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:15,112 I'm leaving on June 8th. 334 00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:19,450 Yeah. 335 00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:22,328 And I'm really sorry about that. I just... 336 00:19:22,745 --> 00:19:24,747 Yeah, that's too bad. 337 00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:26,916 Yeah. 338 00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:32,254 Do you want me to take these on my way out? 339 00:19:32,338 --> 00:19:34,090 It's okay. I got it. 340 00:19:34,924 --> 00:19:36,008 All right. 341 00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:43,766 Okay, thanks. There you are. What happened? 342 00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:45,768 I got thirsty. How'd it go? 343 00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:48,354 It was amazing. I wish you would have been there. 344 00:19:48,437 --> 00:19:49,790 You would not believe what happened here. 345 00:19:49,814 --> 00:19:51,482 What? Something happened? 346 00:19:52,149 --> 00:19:55,695 This woman came in, sat down, 347 00:19:55,778 --> 00:19:57,029 ordered a drink. 348 00:19:57,113 --> 00:19:59,865 The bartender asked for her ID, which I thought was odd, 349 00:19:59,949 --> 00:20:01,259 because I pegged her at, like, 35. 350 00:20:01,283 --> 00:20:02,868 Weird. Yeah, really weird. 351 00:20:02,952 --> 00:20:05,830 So, she's like, "I don't have my ID, please give me one." 352 00:20:05,913 --> 00:20:08,791 And he's, like, "I can't do that. I can't serve you." 353 00:20:08,874 --> 00:20:10,418 Con artist. She might have been. 354 00:20:10,501 --> 00:20:13,796 So she says, "fine. I will go to my room, I will get my purse, 355 00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:17,425 "I will come back, I'll show you my ID." She hasn't come back yet. 356 00:20:17,508 --> 00:20:20,136 She's probably in the room, drinking from the mini bar. 357 00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:22,138 Michael: Right? 358 00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:24,473 Michael: Dwight gave a great speech. 359 00:20:24,557 --> 00:20:26,392 That's the word on the street, anyway. 360 00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:30,229 And I entertained Dwight to no end with my bar story. 361 00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:34,525 So I captivated the guy who captivated a thousand guys. 362 00:20:35,776 --> 00:20:38,404 Can you believe that? A thousand guys.