1 00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:05,923 Can you confirm that the straps are tight? 2 00:00:06,256 --> 00:00:07,382 Yes. 3 00:00:08,717 --> 00:00:09,760 But this seems a little... 4 00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:11,220 And now the chains. 5 00:00:13,222 --> 00:00:15,974 A lot of people think that magic camp is just for kids. 6 00:00:16,058 --> 00:00:19,311 And that's why so many other people in my class were kids. 7 00:00:19,394 --> 00:00:21,480 Self-fulfilling prophecy. 8 00:00:22,231 --> 00:00:27,694 It's really for anybody with a dream and a belief in magic, 9 00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:30,781 and a little extra time aflerschool 10 00:00:31,406 --> 00:00:34,868 magic, magic, magic. 11 00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:38,914 And now, Michael the magic will attempt 12 00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:41,416 to escape from extreme bondage. 13 00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:44,670 Can he do it? I don't see how he can. 14 00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:45,921 I know how. 15 00:00:46,004 --> 00:00:47,774 He'll dislocate his shoulder and slip his arm out. 16 00:00:47,798 --> 00:00:50,050 No. No. 17 00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:52,719 Everyone, now count down with me. 18 00:00:53,136 --> 00:00:55,138 Three... Sorry. Sorry, quick thing. 19 00:00:55,222 --> 00:00:57,307 So is it true that if you can't get out, 20 00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:58,711 you don't want anyone to help you? 21 00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:01,687 I will get out. Oh, yes. I will. 22 00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:05,274 So we shouldn't help you no matter how much you might beg and plead? 23 00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:08,610 No. All right. Just... this is getting hot, so let's just do this, okay? 24 00:01:08,694 --> 00:01:12,239 All: Ready! Three! Two! One! 25 00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:20,205 (Groaning) 26 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:37,806 (Both groan) 27 00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:40,392 (Yelling) 28 00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:43,937 Is everything okay, Michael? 29 00:01:44,813 --> 00:01:45,814 Yes. 30 00:01:47,733 --> 00:01:50,485 Michael: I cannot tell you how I plan to escape 31 00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,405 other than by using magic. 32 00:01:53,697 --> 00:01:55,824 That is the magician's code. 33 00:01:59,578 --> 00:02:01,371 Separately on an unrelated note, 34 00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:04,916 if you happen to find a small brass key... 35 00:02:27,356 --> 00:02:32,194 All right, ready? Come on, guys. Early worm gets the worm. 36 00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:34,738 Another worm, like, are they friends? 37 00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:36,281 That's, "early bird gets the worm." 38 00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:37,491 Okay. 39 00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:38,784 (Blowing) 40 00:02:38,867 --> 00:02:40,107 Pam, would you smell my breath? 41 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:41,161 No. No. 42 00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:42,704 Dwight: Let me smell. 43 00:02:46,958 --> 00:02:48,001 Good. Not great. 44 00:02:48,251 --> 00:02:50,855 Michael, you go to parties all the time. Why is tonight so special? 45 00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:52,381 Well, tonight is so special 46 00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:54,883 because my boss's boss's boss, the cfo, 47 00:02:54,966 --> 00:02:57,719 not his initials, common mistake, 48 00:02:57,803 --> 00:02:59,304 is having a little shindig 49 00:02:59,388 --> 00:03:01,348 for all the managers in the company. 50 00:03:01,431 --> 00:03:04,851 And jan and I are going as a couple for the first time. 51 00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:08,313 So it's kind of our coming out party, really. 52 00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:10,941 And that is why tonight is so special. 53 00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:12,609 Jimbo, last chance, carpool. 54 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:14,462 Oh, no thanks. I think Karen and I will take my car. 55 00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:15,838 Yeah. You sure? Might be a good idea... 56 00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:18,383 If we all went together, we could save some gas, have fun. Long trip. 57 00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:20,492 Thanks. Play some games? 58 00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:23,120 Not... yeah. I spy. 59 00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:25,706 Why don't I wanna go? 60 00:03:25,789 --> 00:03:28,834 Didn't expect to need a reason. So, let me think here. 61 00:03:28,917 --> 00:03:30,085 (Clears throat) 62 00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:31,962 I don't know any of these people. 63 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,088 It's an obligation. 64 00:03:33,171 --> 00:03:36,049 I don't like talking paper in my free time. 65 00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:37,592 Or in my work time. 66 00:03:37,676 --> 00:03:40,679 And did I use the word "pointless"? 67 00:03:41,888 --> 00:03:43,473 Thanks for inviting me along. 68 00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:44,725 Oh, sure. 69 00:03:44,975 --> 00:03:46,435 I really didn't give it anythought 70 00:03:46,518 --> 00:03:47,561 wait, should you be going? 71 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:49,354 (Cell phone ringing) 72 00:03:50,439 --> 00:03:52,315 Hello, you. Jan: Michael? 73 00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:53,650 Hey, buttercup. 74 00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:55,586 I am on my way. I should be there in about 15... 75 00:03:55,610 --> 00:03:57,362 All right, let's just blow this party off. 76 00:03:57,446 --> 00:03:59,322 Yeah. That's what she said. 77 00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,116 Am I on speakerphone? 78 00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:02,659 Yes, you are. 79 00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:03,785 Is anybody else... 80 00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:04,953 Hello, jan! 81 00:04:05,036 --> 00:04:07,789 Hi, Dwight. Okay, Michael, take me off speakerphone. 82 00:04:07,873 --> 00:04:09,291 No problem. 83 00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:10,709 (Beeping) 84 00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:12,228 Okay, let's just go to a motel and... 85 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:13,295 Okay. 86 00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:15,672 Just, like, rip into each other like we did 87 00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:17,632 on that black sand beach in Jamaica. 88 00:04:17,716 --> 00:04:18,800 Okay, jan? 89 00:04:18,884 --> 00:04:22,095 Jan, this party is actually a very big step for us. 90 00:04:22,179 --> 00:04:23,180 Sol... 91 00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,806 I'm still on speaker? 92 00:04:25,682 --> 00:04:27,225 I... I... I don't know. 93 00:04:27,309 --> 00:04:28,351 Are the cameras there? 94 00:04:28,435 --> 00:04:29,561 Maybe. 95 00:04:29,895 --> 00:04:31,396 Okay. See you soon. 96 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:34,608 Okay. All right. Bye. Talk to you later, jan. 97 00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:36,026 Pam: Hey, Michael left early. 98 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,549 So a bunch of us are gonna go to poor Richards for happy hour. 99 00:04:38,612 --> 00:04:39,863 You should come. 100 00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:41,031 I can't. 101 00:04:42,199 --> 00:04:46,077 My brother, he just unloaded the jet skis and he, kind of, took a bath, 102 00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:47,621 so we're gonna go get hammered. 103 00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:50,123 Okay. Well, we're going to a bar. 104 00:04:53,335 --> 00:04:56,213 Hey, you have to come to stuff with me. 105 00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:58,840 I'm serious. 106 00:04:58,924 --> 00:04:59,984 If you're going to be my boyfriend, 107 00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:01,927 you have to do boyfriend things. 108 00:05:05,222 --> 00:05:06,348 Okay. 109 00:05:07,182 --> 00:05:10,143 I've decided that I'm going to be more honest. 110 00:05:10,227 --> 00:05:13,313 I'm gonna start telling people what I want directly. 111 00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:17,859 So look out world 'cause old Pammy is getting what she wants. 112 00:05:19,027 --> 00:05:20,695 And don't call me Pammy. 113 00:05:22,113 --> 00:05:23,615 Beauty. 114 00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:25,325 Thank you, §n thanksalot 115 00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:26,743 thank you. 116 00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:31,346 You're dressed exactly like the servants. 117 00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:32,749 Shut up. 118 00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:34,876 Okay, change shirts with me. 119 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,044 Wait. 120 00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:38,022 I don't think yours will fit me. 121 00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:39,923 I don't care. 122 00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:47,180 Oh, wow. 123 00:05:48,890 --> 00:05:50,016 Here. 124 00:05:50,308 --> 00:05:53,186 Don't put myjacket on... Don't give me that. 125 00:05:53,645 --> 00:05:55,245 That would have been really embarrassing. 126 00:05:55,272 --> 00:05:56,356 Yes. 127 00:05:56,439 --> 00:05:57,607 Crisis averted. 128 00:05:57,691 --> 00:05:58,733 Okay 129 00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:03,905 (music playing) 130 00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,325 That duck is so cute. 131 00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:12,122 Kevin: Hey, Pam. 132 00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:13,456 Pam: Hey, guys. 133 00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:15,375 Kevin: Oscar. Angela. 134 00:06:17,502 --> 00:06:18,712 Hi! 135 00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:23,508 Actually, it's polite o arrive early. And smart. 136 00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:26,928 Only really good friends show up early. 137 00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:31,057 Ergo, de facto, go to a party early, become a really good friend. 138 00:06:31,141 --> 00:06:32,976 Oh, potato salad? 139 00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:34,060 It's from both of us. 140 00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:35,604 No, it's not. 141 00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:39,608 Wonderful. Let's see where we can put this. 142 00:06:39,983 --> 00:06:40,984 Okay. 143 00:06:41,318 --> 00:06:43,528 Oh, you know, you probably want to leave the cover on 144 00:06:43,612 --> 00:06:44,779 until the guests get here. 145 00:06:45,030 --> 00:06:47,616 (Whispering) It's been sitting in my car all day. 146 00:06:48,783 --> 00:06:51,286 Sun beating down on the mayonnaise. 147 00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:54,789 Just... you never know. 148 00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:58,418 Kevin, you and Stacy set a date yet? 149 00:06:58,501 --> 00:06:59,711 Yeah. 150 00:06:59,794 --> 00:07:00,962 Oh, my god. When is it? 151 00:07:01,046 --> 00:07:02,380 It's complicated. 152 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:06,217 I would appreciate some space on this. 153 00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:07,928 Roy: Hey! 154 00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:11,306 Hey! You made it. 155 00:07:11,389 --> 00:07:12,700 Well, you said it was important, so... 156 00:07:12,724 --> 00:07:13,975 It is. 157 00:07:14,726 --> 00:07:15,977 How's it going? 158 00:07:16,061 --> 00:07:17,062 What's up, Pam? 159 00:07:17,145 --> 00:07:19,356 Hey, Kenny. Sorry about the jet skis. 160 00:07:21,524 --> 00:07:23,276 You guys all want a round on me? 161 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:24,444 All: Yeah! Yeah? 162 00:07:24,527 --> 00:07:25,713 Let's get you a drink. Thanks, man. 163 00:07:25,737 --> 00:07:26,821 I'm thirsty. 164 00:07:26,905 --> 00:07:28,615 Pam: No, thank you. Roy, I... 165 00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:30,158 Kelly: You should get a round, Pam. 166 00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:35,872 Oh, you know that line on the top of the shrimp? 167 00:07:36,665 --> 00:07:38,166 That's feces. 168 00:07:39,918 --> 00:07:42,295 What you looking for? You bring dip? 169 00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:44,464 I'm sure that it's catered. 170 00:07:44,547 --> 00:07:46,216 I need you to sign these, Michael. 171 00:07:47,008 --> 00:07:49,177 It's a waiver of some of your rights. 172 00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:50,804 You should read it carefully. 173 00:07:50,887 --> 00:07:53,306 It releases the company in the event that our relationship, 174 00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:56,142 in your opinion or in reality, interferes with work. 175 00:07:56,226 --> 00:07:59,229 You get a copy, I get a copy and a third copy goes to hr. 176 00:08:00,188 --> 00:08:02,524 Awesome. I'm gonna frame mine. 177 00:08:03,191 --> 00:08:04,442 I could frame yours, too. 178 00:08:04,526 --> 00:08:06,403 You realize this is... This is a legal document 179 00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,613 that says you can't sue the company... 180 00:08:08,697 --> 00:08:10,907 Over our love. 181 00:08:11,866 --> 00:08:15,120 I've never told you that I love you. 182 00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:18,540 You don't have to, jan. This contract says it all. 183 00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:22,627 I am taking a calculated risk. What's the upside? 184 00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:25,088 I overcome my nausea, fall deeply in love, 185 00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:27,590 babies, normalcy, no more self-loathing. 186 00:08:27,674 --> 00:08:30,552 Downside? 187 00:08:30,635 --> 00:08:32,012 I date Michael Scott publicly 188 00:08:32,095 --> 00:08:34,222 and collapse in on myself like a dying star. 189 00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:39,019 What's this over the "I"? 190 00:08:39,102 --> 00:08:40,145 It's a heart. 191 00:08:42,063 --> 00:08:44,858 Why is this so hard? 192 00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:50,447 That's what she said. Oh, my god, what am I saying? 193 00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:52,991 I love this woman! 194 00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:54,117 Oh, god. 195 00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:56,327 Michael, please. Michael, please. 196 00:08:57,829 --> 00:08:59,873 Do you ever watch Battlestar Galactica? 197 00:08:59,956 --> 00:09:02,208 No? Then you're an idiot. 198 00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:03,877 Hello, Michael. 199 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,921 Rachel! Boy, you clean up good. 200 00:09:07,005 --> 00:09:09,924 The place looks great with all the lights on and everything. 201 00:09:10,008 --> 00:09:13,344 Actually looks bigger with people in it. It's weird. So... 202 00:09:13,428 --> 00:09:15,513 Jan, glad you could make it. 203 00:09:15,597 --> 00:09:17,182 Oh, of course. Of course, David. 204 00:09:17,265 --> 00:09:19,160 Do you remember Michael Scott from the Scranton branch? 205 00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:20,685 Of course, I do. How are you, Michael? 206 00:09:20,769 --> 00:09:22,896 Jan and I are lovers. 207 00:09:22,979 --> 00:09:25,190 It feels so good to finally say that out loud. 208 00:09:25,273 --> 00:09:28,068 David, can I speak to you privately 209 00:09:28,151 --> 00:09:29,611 for just a moment, please? 210 00:09:30,236 --> 00:09:31,237 Excuse me. 211 00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:32,614 Okay. 212 00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:35,408 (Music playing) 213 00:09:37,285 --> 00:09:38,536 (Exclaims) 214 00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:44,793 No. Actually, one of these is supposed to be alight. 215 00:09:44,876 --> 00:09:46,252 Oh, sorry. 216 00:09:48,505 --> 00:09:50,173 So did the merger go smoothly or... 217 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:51,299 It did. 218 00:09:51,382 --> 00:09:54,135 "Like butter." Mike Myers, snl. 219 00:09:54,219 --> 00:09:56,012 You should ask Karen. She was one of them. 220 00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:59,891 I'm the only one left. Everybody else was either fired or quit. 221 00:09:59,974 --> 00:10:01,952 And there's one in anger management. Michael: Yeah. 222 00:10:01,976 --> 00:10:06,606 But you're great now, right? We're all great. Aren't we great? 223 00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:08,691 We're good. 224 00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:11,111 Michael, please stop that, okay? 225 00:10:11,194 --> 00:10:12,695 Can I get anyone anything? 226 00:10:12,779 --> 00:10:14,489 I could go for an appe-teaser. 227 00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:16,616 Martini, please. Yep, bagel bites or something. 228 00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:18,076 Rachel, your house is beautiful. 229 00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:19,244 Thank you. 230 00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:21,371 What's the square footage? 231 00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:23,998 About 5,000. 232 00:10:24,082 --> 00:10:25,242 Does that include the garage? 233 00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:28,503 Dwight, wow. That's not appropriate. 234 00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:30,318 I don't know. It's a common question. 235 00:10:30,380 --> 00:10:32,966 David, how much did this house cost? 236 00:10:33,716 --> 00:10:36,761 These old colonials are great when they're sound. 237 00:10:36,845 --> 00:10:39,180 Pdloveto take a look around. 238 00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:40,849 I'll show you around, sure. 239 00:10:40,932 --> 00:10:42,559 Cool. Let's start with the banisters. 240 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:43,685 Hey. 241 00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,062 Do you see that guy behind you 242 00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:48,565 in the que blazer against the wall? 243 00:10:50,275 --> 00:10:51,526 That's Drake. 244 00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:54,171 And just so, you know, I don't want to be weird or anything, 245 00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:56,447 but we used to date. 246 00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:58,324 (Exclaims) 247 00:10:58,950 --> 00:11:00,702 Okay. Cool. Thanks for telling me. 248 00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:02,328 And it didn't end well. 249 00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:06,040 Got you. All right. 250 00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:12,755 This was a gift 251 00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:15,049 from Lee iacocca. 252 00:11:15,133 --> 00:11:17,844 Twenty-year-old single malt scotch. 253 00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:22,807 Here is to Mr. Iacocca and his failed experiment, the de lorean. 254 00:11:25,476 --> 00:11:26,978 (Coughing) 255 00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:29,647 Are you okay? 256 00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:31,191 Yeah. Do you have any ice? 257 00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:32,525 (Coughing) 258 00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:34,068 Sure. 259 00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:35,862 Michael: How about some splenda? 260 00:11:37,572 --> 00:11:39,407 One, two, three! Up Jenkins! 261 00:11:39,908 --> 00:11:41,034 Down Jenkins! 262 00:11:41,117 --> 00:11:42,595 Oh, I think I hear the quarter over here. 263 00:11:42,619 --> 00:11:43,661 Where? On this side. 264 00:11:43,745 --> 00:11:45,914 No, it is definitely under one of these hands. 265 00:11:45,997 --> 00:11:47,266 I, kind of, heard it on Roy's side too. 266 00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:49,209 No. It is here. 267 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:52,003 Not here. Not here. Not here. 268 00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:53,504 Not here. 269 00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:55,490 Good thing you didn't listen to me. 270 00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:56,591 Yeah. Close one. 271 00:11:56,674 --> 00:11:57,967 Not here. 272 00:11:58,551 --> 00:11:59,802 It's not here. 273 00:12:00,303 --> 00:12:02,305 Okay, it's either here or here. 274 00:12:06,476 --> 00:12:07,560 Not here. 275 00:12:07,644 --> 00:12:09,103 Kenny: Oh, yes! Yes! 276 00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:10,396 (Kenny laughing) 277 00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:11,606 Nice job. 278 00:12:11,689 --> 00:12:12,774 I can read you like a book. 279 00:12:12,857 --> 00:12:13,858 Oh, yeah? 280 00:12:13,942 --> 00:12:15,360 You can't keep anything from me. 281 00:12:15,944 --> 00:12:17,362 (Roy laughing) 282 00:12:17,445 --> 00:12:18,821 Kenny: Bottoms up! 283 00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:20,615 Hey, creed. Hey! 284 00:12:20,698 --> 00:12:22,659 What's up, creed? What do you guys up to? 285 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:23,743 (Exclaims) 286 00:12:23,826 --> 00:12:24,869 Hello. 287 00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:26,496 You're the man, buddy. 288 00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:30,667 I run a small fake ID company from my car with a laminating machine 289 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,835 that I swiped from the sheriff's station. 290 00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:36,464 (Exclaims) 291 00:12:36,547 --> 00:12:39,300 Yeah, these studs are way too far apart. 292 00:12:40,343 --> 00:12:41,469 (Sighs) 293 00:12:42,136 --> 00:12:43,137 What's in here? 294 00:12:43,221 --> 00:12:44,764 That's a guest room. 295 00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:46,641 Just the one window? 296 00:12:46,724 --> 00:12:47,892 (Phone ringing) 297 00:12:47,976 --> 00:12:50,395 Oh, I must get that. You'll have to excuse me. 298 00:12:50,478 --> 00:12:51,938 Are those real pearls? 299 00:12:52,021 --> 00:12:53,439 Yes. They're... 300 00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:02,031 (Beeping) 301 00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:05,410 Good. 302 00:13:05,576 --> 00:13:08,663 Well, it was nice meeting you guys. Take care. 303 00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:13,084 Well, if you're wondering why his wife was staring daggers at me, 304 00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:16,713 it's because I kind of saw him for a little bit when they were separated. 305 00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:18,589 Oh, didn't notice. 306 00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:20,633 Really? I thought it was so obvious. 307 00:13:21,259 --> 00:13:22,927 I'm glad it didn't make you uncomfortable. 308 00:13:23,011 --> 00:13:26,097 No, it was before I knew you, so it's fine. 309 00:13:27,849 --> 00:13:30,059 This one really smells like vanilla. Check that out. 310 00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:31,227 That's nice. 311 00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:33,354 You and the missus should join us 312 00:13:33,438 --> 00:13:36,065 in sandals, Jamaica next Christmas. 313 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:38,818 Michael, I think David probably wants 314 00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:40,611 to spend Christmas here with his family. 315 00:13:40,695 --> 00:13:43,698 Yeah. They don't allow kids at sandals. 316 00:13:43,781 --> 00:13:47,452 They are persona non grata there. 317 00:13:47,994 --> 00:13:50,413 Oh, but it's fun. It is an awesome place. 318 00:13:50,496 --> 00:13:52,832 You would not believe how low this girl can limbo. 319 00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:54,459 It's crazy. David, I'm sorry, 320 00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:56,979 you're just going to have to excuse us for just a couple minutes. 321 00:13:57,003 --> 00:13:58,880 Sorry. Okay. Okay. 322 00:13:58,963 --> 00:14:01,132 Excuse me. What's going on? 323 00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:02,550 What is it? 324 00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:03,676 Sorry. 325 00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,970 What's... what's the matter? 326 00:14:07,013 --> 00:14:08,556 What... what did I... 327 00:14:08,639 --> 00:14:09,891 Come on. 328 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:12,101 Just... just... just... 329 00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:16,731 (Chuckung) 330 00:14:16,814 --> 00:14:18,274 What are you doing? 331 00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,234 Don't you know what I'm doing? 332 00:14:20,318 --> 00:14:23,696 Yeah, but you could tell me. Wow. What... what is that? 333 00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:26,240 Why are we... why are we going in the bathroom? 334 00:14:26,324 --> 00:14:28,284 I thought this was where you liked your privacy. 335 00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:29,619 Shut up. 336 00:14:31,621 --> 00:14:33,706 Michael: What has gotten into you? No, no, no. 337 00:14:33,790 --> 00:14:34,832 Jan: What? 338 00:14:34,916 --> 00:14:36,352 Comeom let's get back to the party. Come on. 339 00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:38,354 Wait, let me just take my dress off. We're missing everybody. 340 00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:39,938 Michael: Don't take that... No, stop it! Stop it! 341 00:14:39,962 --> 00:14:41,964 Jan! No! No! No! Michael... 342 00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:43,758 Michael: No means "please don't." 343 00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:45,611 Means... slam me up against the wall right here. 344 00:14:45,635 --> 00:14:47,154 I'm not going to slam you up against anything. 345 00:14:47,178 --> 00:14:49,389 You're acting inappropriate, jan. I want you so... 346 00:14:49,472 --> 00:14:50,973 I'm acting inappropriate? Yeah. 347 00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:53,267 Jan: Forget it. Get out of my way. 348 00:14:58,147 --> 00:14:59,190 Here. 349 00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:01,794 Where have you been all night? 350 00:15:01,818 --> 00:15:03,945 I was looking forward to hanging out with you. 351 00:15:04,028 --> 00:15:05,029 I was... 352 00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:07,907 Hey, don't you have a daughter? 353 00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:10,701 Yes. 354 00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:15,790 (Creaking) 355 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,669 Oh, good. You're up. 356 00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:21,045 Hey, who makes this chair? 357 00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:24,132 I don't know. It was here when I was born. 358 00:15:24,966 --> 00:15:26,426 I want one. 359 00:15:26,509 --> 00:15:28,845 It's really good, solid construction. It's comfortable. 360 00:15:28,928 --> 00:15:29,929 (Knocking) 361 00:15:30,012 --> 00:15:31,305 What is this, oak? 362 00:15:32,557 --> 00:15:33,933 I don't know. 363 00:15:34,559 --> 00:15:35,977 What do you know? 364 00:15:45,236 --> 00:15:47,071 God, I hate these parties. 365 00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:49,449 You wanna sneak out back and shoot some hoops? 366 00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:55,705 Meet me outside in two minutes. 367 00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:58,082 Now you stay here and have fun 368 00:15:58,166 --> 00:16:01,252 'cause I'm going to go out back and shoot hoops with David Wallace. 369 00:16:01,335 --> 00:16:02,462 Okay. 370 00:16:02,837 --> 00:16:03,880 (Exclaims) 371 00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:06,215 Don't mention that you and I are dating 372 00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:08,468 'cause I think he might still have feelings for me. 373 00:16:08,551 --> 00:16:09,802 Vvahace? 374 00:16:10,845 --> 00:16:13,306 What the hell? Have you dated, like, every guy here? 375 00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,603 (Laughing) 376 00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:20,688 Wow. 377 00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:22,106 Okay. 378 00:16:22,190 --> 00:16:23,232 You got me. 379 00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:24,775 I so got you. 380 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,110 80 none of them? 381 00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:27,278 Of course not. 382 00:16:27,778 --> 00:16:30,990 I mean you're, kind of, like, my first. 383 00:16:32,116 --> 00:16:33,367 Really? 384 00:16:33,451 --> 00:16:34,869 Oh, my god, it's so easy... Okay. 385 00:16:34,952 --> 00:16:36,787 It's not even fun. 386 00:16:39,957 --> 00:16:41,000 Hey, jan. 387 00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:42,168 Not too good. 388 00:16:45,213 --> 00:16:48,382 Did you get a chance to try Michael's homemade potato salad? 389 00:16:48,466 --> 00:16:50,826 Michael: Rachel thinks that I brought homemade potato salad. 390 00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:54,180 But I just picked it up at the supermarket. It's funny. 391 00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:56,224 I wish I could make potato salad that good. 392 00:16:56,307 --> 00:16:58,476 It's just potatoes and mayonnaise. 393 00:16:58,559 --> 00:17:00,811 There's something wrong with jan. 394 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:02,021 (Groans) 395 00:17:02,104 --> 00:17:03,397 What's... 396 00:17:04,732 --> 00:17:05,942 What's with jan and Michael? 397 00:17:07,151 --> 00:17:10,655 I don't know... where to begin. 398 00:17:10,738 --> 00:17:12,281 (Bothlaugh) 399 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:15,368 (Clattering) 400 00:17:23,417 --> 00:17:24,710 My ball. 401 00:17:24,794 --> 00:17:27,380 The chimney's in decent shape. Not great. 402 00:17:27,463 --> 00:17:29,257 I found some termite damage in a crawl space 403 00:17:29,340 --> 00:17:32,009 and some structural flaws in the foundation. 404 00:17:32,093 --> 00:17:34,512 So, all in all, 405 00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:38,307 it was a pretty fun cocktail party. 406 00:17:41,143 --> 00:17:43,062 What? 407 00:17:43,145 --> 00:17:44,355 I want us to make it. 408 00:17:44,939 --> 00:17:46,399 I want a fresh start. 409 00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:49,110 That's awesome. That's what I want. 410 00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:52,697 Okay, but in order for us to make it, 411 00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:55,074 there can't be any secrets between us. 412 00:17:55,157 --> 00:17:57,201 I didn't... I didn't do anything. 413 00:17:57,285 --> 00:18:00,037 Ask anybody. I totally could have and I didn't at all. 414 00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:01,539 Just listen. 415 00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:04,500 Remember that casino night about a month 416 00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,752 before we were supposed to get married? 417 00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:07,878 I kissed Jim. 418 00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:10,298 What? 419 00:18:10,381 --> 00:18:11,382 He told me how he felt 420 00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:13,134 and I guess I had feelings, too. 421 00:18:13,217 --> 00:18:14,385 And we kissed. 422 00:18:14,468 --> 00:18:15,469 Jim came on to you? 423 00:18:15,553 --> 00:18:16,554 Just listen. 424 00:18:16,637 --> 00:18:18,973 No, I am listening! That's the problem, I'm listening! 425 00:18:19,056 --> 00:18:20,057 Dontyeu 426 00:18:20,141 --> 00:18:21,475 don't yell? 427 00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:27,273 This is over. 428 00:18:27,356 --> 00:18:29,483 Yeah. You're right. This is so over! 429 00:18:29,567 --> 00:18:32,403 Are you kidding me, Pam? Come on! 430 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:35,197 God! 431 00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:36,532 (Glass shattering) 432 00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:38,534 Stupid jet skis! 433 00:18:39,994 --> 00:18:41,454 (Yelling) 434 00:18:44,206 --> 00:18:45,833 Our first fight. 435 00:18:49,003 --> 00:18:51,380 If this is about what happened in the bathroom, 436 00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:52,882 there was no place to cuddle... 437 00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:54,467 I feel sick. 438 00:18:55,426 --> 00:18:57,279 You didn't have any of the potato salad, did you? 439 00:18:57,303 --> 00:19:00,598 You know, we were good when we were just running around, you know? 440 00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:03,643 In secret. It was wrong and it was exciting, 441 00:19:04,435 --> 00:19:07,730 and maybe it was a mistake to take it public. 442 00:19:11,150 --> 00:19:14,862 Well, if that's the way you feel, my lady, 443 00:19:14,945 --> 00:19:16,697 then you have hurt me greatly. 444 00:19:16,781 --> 00:19:18,616 Michael... greatly. 445 00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:19,909 Please don't cry. 446 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:21,202 I'm not going to cry. 447 00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:24,038 Ifeelhkeit but I am not going to. 448 00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:26,499 Why don't you just take your stupid love contract 449 00:19:26,582 --> 00:19:27,809 and tear it up into a million pieces? 450 00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:29,794 It was never aloveconuaclhmchael yeah. 451 00:19:29,877 --> 00:19:31,521 And besides, I have already given a copy to David. 452 00:19:31,545 --> 00:19:33,565 Itwould bejust as embarrassing to get it back from him 453 00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:35,484 as it was handing it to him... I want the house, jan. 454 00:19:35,508 --> 00:19:37,093 I want the picket fence. 455 00:19:37,176 --> 00:19:40,930 I want the ketchup fights and the tickling and the giggling. 456 00:19:44,809 --> 00:19:46,352 I didn't mean it, okay? I was... 457 00:19:46,435 --> 00:19:47,436 Whatever. 458 00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:52,191 I was tired. I'm tired and I didn't eat enough. And that's all. That was it. 459 00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:54,294 That's it. You didn't mean it. That's all. No, I didn't. 460 00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:55,569 That's all. So... 461 00:19:55,653 --> 00:19:57,571 I'm just saying I didn't mean it. 462 00:19:57,655 --> 00:19:58,781 Okay. Fine. 463 00:20:02,159 --> 00:20:03,327 I love you, jan. 464 00:20:03,411 --> 00:20:04,453 Okay. 465 00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:11,502 Don't break up, you guys. 466 00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:16,132 You're great together. 467 00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:27,518 Are they gonna call the cops? 468 00:20:27,601 --> 00:20:28,936 No. I paid them off. 469 00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:32,857 Jet ski money? 470 00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:34,024 All of it. 471 00:20:35,109 --> 00:20:37,236 I'm gonna kill Jim Halpert.