1 00:00:03,212 --> 00:00:04,213 Hey. Hey. 2 00:00:04,296 --> 00:00:06,256 I got you one. Oh, wow. Thank you. 3 00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:07,525 Yeah. I'm just going to grab some chips. 4 00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:09,259 You want some? No, thanks. 5 00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:10,969 We're still having lunch today, right? 6 00:00:11,053 --> 00:00:12,471 I guess. 7 00:00:16,517 --> 00:00:17,976 How dare you. 8 00:00:31,782 --> 00:00:34,618 Hey, Toby, what's this? 9 00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:36,763 "I just want to remind everyone about the company rules 10 00:00:36,787 --> 00:00:40,415 "involving PDA, or public displays of affection"? 11 00:00:40,499 --> 00:00:43,126 Yes. Some people in the office have complained... 12 00:00:43,210 --> 00:00:44,753 Oh, really? About some other people 13 00:00:44,836 --> 00:00:46,338 engaging in PDA, 14 00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:49,967 and, you know, I just want to remind that it's not appropriate to do that. 15 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,927 Is this about me and jan in my office? 16 00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:54,221 Because I will have you know that that was consensual. 17 00:00:54,304 --> 00:00:57,558 What we did has nothing to do with you or anyone here. 18 00:00:57,641 --> 00:01:00,269 I don't think anyone heard anything. 19 00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:04,481 We were very discreet and most people had left by that point. 20 00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:06,565 Okay... so I don't think it's any of your business. 21 00:01:06,608 --> 00:01:10,112 What I think you should do is roll up the memo real tight... 22 00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:12,364 Okay, hey, look, the memo was not about you. 23 00:01:12,447 --> 00:01:16,326 For the record, I have never been involved with anyone at work in any capacity. 24 00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,620 All right, everyone. Look.H_. 25 00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:21,290 All right, the complaint was about Jim and Pam. 26 00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:25,836 No way. What? 27 00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,796 You guys are together? 28 00:01:32,884 --> 00:01:35,804 Yes, we are. Wow! 29 00:01:35,887 --> 00:01:37,681 Awesome! Tuna! 30 00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,057 I knew it. Michael: You guys! 31 00:01:39,141 --> 00:01:41,393 To the two of you. Michael: Yes! Yes! 32 00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:44,605 Toby, was this your fun little way of congratulating us? 33 00:01:45,981 --> 00:01:46,982 Yes. 34 00:01:47,065 --> 00:01:49,484 Okay, mind is exploding. 35 00:01:49,568 --> 00:01:51,612 Get over here. Come on. 36 00:01:51,695 --> 00:01:54,239 Come here. Okay. 37 00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:56,074 Okay, stand up. 38 00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,410 Okay, here we go. 39 00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:04,625 Everyone, this is a day that will live in infamy, 40 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:11,214 because today is the day that Jim and Pam become one. 41 00:02:11,298 --> 00:02:12,942 Actually we've been dating for a couple of months. 42 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:15,927 I love you guys so much. 43 00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:19,056 (Sighs) 44 00:02:20,307 --> 00:02:21,308 (Phone ringing) 45 00:02:21,391 --> 00:02:24,227 Phone's ringing. No, no, no, Pam, let them ring. 46 00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:28,732 Let the bells of dunder Mifflin chime out your love, 47 00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:33,570 because this is really good. This is really good. 48 00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:39,534 My heart soars with the eagle's nest. 49 00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:42,913 I don't see it. I think they both could do better. 50 00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:47,709 It's not a surprise to me. Pam is the office mattress. 51 00:02:47,959 --> 00:02:49,336 Jim Halpert's off the market. 52 00:02:49,419 --> 00:02:53,048 Guess who just became the best-looking single guy in the office? 53 00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:30,085 Hey, can you make that straighter? 54 00:03:31,002 --> 00:03:32,796 That's what she said. 55 00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:34,756 Did you plan that? 56 00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:38,719 "Can you make that straighter? 57 00:03:38,802 --> 00:03:40,637 "Thatjob looks hard. 58 00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,973 "You should put your mouth on that." 59 00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:45,434 How can you even use that one naturally? 60 00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:47,352 Blowing up balloons, I thought. 61 00:03:47,436 --> 00:03:49,646 Pam: "You mightwant to trim it a little." Michael... 62 00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,898 Oh, is Ryan coming backtoday? 63 00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:54,234 Yeah, he is. 64 00:03:57,487 --> 00:04:00,031 Pam and Jim are together. Ryan is visiting. 65 00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:03,910 Only thing that could make this day better is ice cream. 66 00:04:07,205 --> 00:04:08,832 What do you want? 67 00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:10,375 To give you this. 68 00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:13,128 What is that? 69 00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:14,671 It's a feral barn cat. 70 00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:16,675 Itrapped him last night and I'm giving him to you 71 00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:18,800 as a replacement cat for the one I destroyed. 72 00:04:18,884 --> 00:04:20,677 Her name was sprinkles. 73 00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:24,097 And his name is garbage. 74 00:04:24,473 --> 00:04:27,142 Mose calls him garbage, 'cause he likes to eat garbage. 75 00:04:27,225 --> 00:04:28,310 Don't you, garbage? 76 00:04:28,393 --> 00:04:29,436 (Imitates chewing) 77 00:04:29,519 --> 00:04:32,314 I can't believe you just thought you could replace sprinkles. 78 00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:34,357 Before she's even in the ground. 79 00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:35,984 You haven't buried her yet? 80 00:04:36,067 --> 00:04:37,861 Don't rush me. I'm grieving. 81 00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:41,364 Garbage can be very helpful, okay? He's a useful cat. 82 00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:44,159 He killed an entire family of raccoons. Look at him. 83 00:04:44,242 --> 00:04:47,454 I don't want garbage. I want sprinkles. 84 00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:51,958 (Sighs) 85 00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:57,881 (Meows) 86 00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:02,969 Hey, Toby. 87 00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:05,597 Hey, you two. 88 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:06,681 Jim: Hey. 89 00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:09,100 So, now that we are dating, 90 00:05:09,184 --> 00:05:11,645 we just wanted to know if we had to sign one of those 91 00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:14,022 "we're dating" things for the company. 92 00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:19,444 Oh, well, you know those are only for, you know, "relationships." 93 00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:23,240 So if this is just a casual thing, there's no need. 94 00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:24,866 Really. Oh. 95 00:05:24,950 --> 00:05:28,745 Well, I won't speak for Jim, but it's, like, pretty official. 96 00:05:31,081 --> 00:05:32,457 Uh-huh. 97 00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:36,920 Sorry, so do we need to sign one or... 98 00:05:37,921 --> 00:05:40,715 Let's just wait and see what happens. Yeah. 99 00:05:41,216 --> 00:05:43,385 Let's just wait. What? 100 00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:45,929 Okay. Oh, okay. 101 00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:47,138 Great. 102 00:05:52,561 --> 00:05:54,396 (Door opens) 103 00:05:55,438 --> 00:05:57,649 Hey, Ryan, welcome back... Hold on one second. 104 00:06:06,408 --> 00:06:08,285 Hey, Pam, it's great to see you. Is Michael in? 105 00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:10,620 Yeah. Michael: Hey. There he is. There he is. 106 00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:12,664 He's back and he's with a beard. 107 00:06:12,747 --> 00:06:13,832 (Laughing) 108 00:06:13,915 --> 00:06:15,458 He has facial hair. 109 00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:19,129 Look at him. All grown up and no place to go. 110 00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:22,549 Hello, Mr. Sonny Crockett. I'm tubbs. 111 00:06:23,258 --> 00:06:24,509 Okay. Should we get started? 112 00:06:24,593 --> 00:06:26,803 Oh, yeah, let's get started because... 113 00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:28,638 Yes, 'cause this is very serious business. 114 00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:30,056 Yeah. Exactly. 115 00:06:30,140 --> 00:06:31,659 This is a business meeting. Business meeting. 116 00:06:31,683 --> 00:06:32,934 Fire guy. Stop that! 117 00:06:33,018 --> 00:06:34,185 (Laughing) That's right. 118 00:06:34,269 --> 00:06:35,872 Michael: That's right. Fire guy. Ryan: Oh, you scared me. 119 00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:37,039 He's the fire guy. Don't start any fires. 120 00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:38,523 (Making sound effects) Fire guy. 121 00:06:38,607 --> 00:06:39,691 You weren't here for that. 122 00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,359 Here for what? When he started the fire. 123 00:06:41,443 --> 00:06:46,114 Look how big he is. Look at you. You are so mature and old 124 00:06:46,197 --> 00:06:49,409 and little man now. You're like our little man. 125 00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:50,660 Okay... little old man-boy. 126 00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:52,203 Michael, everybody... With a beard. 127 00:06:52,287 --> 00:06:53,681 Kevin: Bearded man-boy. Michael: Wow! 128 00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:56,124 Let me say something. I know I used to be a temp here, 129 00:06:56,207 --> 00:06:57,709 but now everything is different. 130 00:06:57,792 --> 00:07:00,337 I'd like your respect. I am your boss now. 131 00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:02,523 You're gonna have to treat me the same way you treated jan. 132 00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:03,632 Oh, wow. 133 00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:06,134 Mmm. That's a little kinky. I don't swing that way. 134 00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:07,969 Okay. (Laughing) Woo! 135 00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:09,405 I think Ryan has a gay crush on me. 136 00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:13,141 Enough! Okay? This is inappropriate and it stops right now. 137 00:07:16,519 --> 00:07:17,938 Do you understand? 138 00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:19,356 Yes. 139 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:21,441 Everybody, come on, settle down. 140 00:07:21,524 --> 00:07:23,151 Let's get serious here. 141 00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:26,905 Ryan has a very special important presentation to do, 142 00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:29,532 which we will be doing in the conference room in 10 minutes. 143 00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:32,619 Perfect. Sound good? Okay. All right. 144 00:07:32,702 --> 00:07:34,037 Yeah, Ryan snapped at me. 145 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:38,124 But there was this twinkle in his eye that I picked up on, which said, 146 00:07:38,208 --> 00:07:41,670 "dude, we're friends. I'm doing this for appearances. 147 00:07:41,753 --> 00:07:43,463 "I am the big boss now, 148 00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:46,633 "and I have to seem like an ogre, but you know me 149 00:07:46,716 --> 00:07:49,970 "and you trust me and we like each other, 150 00:07:50,053 --> 00:07:55,308 "and we'll always be friends and I would never take you for granted 151 00:07:55,392 --> 00:07:57,811 "in a million years. 152 00:07:57,894 --> 00:08:01,439 "And I miss you, man, and I love you." 153 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:03,692 His words. 154 00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:12,742 Dunder Mifflin infinity represents a floor-to-ceiling streamlining 155 00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:14,077 of our business model. 156 00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,996 The centerpiece of the campaign 157 00:08:16,079 --> 00:08:18,999 is a new business-to-business website interface 158 00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:22,627 that will allow us to compete directly with big-box chains. 159 00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:24,295 Wait a second, 160 00:08:24,379 --> 00:08:27,090 last time I checked, dunder Mifflin already has a website. 161 00:08:27,173 --> 00:08:30,176 And quite frankly, I'm not really sure what's wrong with it. 162 00:08:30,885 --> 00:08:33,013 This is a massive overhaul. 163 00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:34,973 We're getting younger, sleeker 164 00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:38,184 and more agile with the way that we adapt to the marketplace. 165 00:08:38,268 --> 00:08:40,913 All essential personnel will be issued blackberries for company use. 166 00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:42,313 Oh, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme. 167 00:08:42,397 --> 00:08:44,834 I'll stick around for a while to help you set them up aftennards. 168 00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:47,527 Any questions? Dwight? 169 00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:51,156 What if we don't want to use a BlackBerry because they are stupid and pointless? 170 00:08:51,239 --> 00:08:52,490 This is company-wide, Dwight. 171 00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:53,575 Dwight: Got it. 172 00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:54,826 Ryan: Andy? 173 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:57,746 You should call it dunder mifflinfinity. 174 00:08:57,912 --> 00:08:59,831 You know, push the words together. 175 00:08:59,914 --> 00:09:01,416 Any other questions? 176 00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:03,960 Kelly kapour? 177 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,629 Can we speak privately about our relationship? 178 00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:07,797 Thank you, everybody. 179 00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:09,466 Ryan Howard, everybody. 180 00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:10,842 Good job. 181 00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:14,137 That was some fun stuff. 182 00:09:14,345 --> 00:09:16,389 When does the website go up? As fast as possible. 183 00:09:16,473 --> 00:09:18,183 We want to start retraining people asap 184 00:09:18,266 --> 00:09:20,161 so we can hit the ground running with the new system. 185 00:09:20,185 --> 00:09:21,561 Cool beans. 186 00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:24,522 We're screwed. Who is? 187 00:09:24,606 --> 00:09:26,649 Us. You and me. The old-timers. 188 00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:28,902 I am not old. You are old. 189 00:09:28,985 --> 00:09:30,737 You are, like, 100. 190 00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:32,614 You're over 40. That's the cut-off. 191 00:09:32,697 --> 00:09:34,824 Are you listening to what he's saying? 192 00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:37,827 "Retraining," "new system, youth." 193 00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:41,790 I'm telling you this kid is the grim reaper. You deal with this 194 00:09:41,873 --> 00:09:46,294 or you, me, Sammy, Phyllis, the chick you hit with the car, we're goners. 195 00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:51,007 I swore I wouldn't tell anybody this, but 196 00:09:52,300 --> 00:09:55,470 in the interest of revealing secrets... 197 00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:58,556 Oh, my god, this is gonna make your brain explode. 198 00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:01,768 Dwight and Angela 199 00:10:01,851 --> 00:10:03,311 dafing. 200 00:10:03,394 --> 00:10:05,188 Have been for six months. 201 00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:07,482 Swear to god. 202 00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:10,211 Oh, this is great. I was actually gonna wait and tell you on your birthday, 203 00:10:10,235 --> 00:10:11,653 but this is much more fun. 204 00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:15,990 No, they have been dating for, like, two years. 205 00:10:16,074 --> 00:10:18,201 Since before your barbecue. 206 00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:21,621 Wait, what? 207 00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:23,998 You knew? 208 00:10:24,332 --> 00:10:25,392 And you didn't say anything? 209 00:10:25,416 --> 00:10:27,544 You didn't say anything to me. 210 00:10:28,753 --> 00:10:30,004 Fair enough. 211 00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:34,384 Wow. We should have started dating, like, a long time ago. 212 00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:35,569 Phyllis: Oh, sorry... Can you believe that? 213 00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:36,946 I didn't know you guys were in here. 214 00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:38,197 Oh, no. We're just sitting here. 215 00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:40,223 I couldn't see your hands. 216 00:10:41,266 --> 00:10:44,811 Hey, Pam, by the way, it's great that you're dating. 217 00:10:44,894 --> 00:10:49,899 But when a new client calls, you just have to randomly assign them to a salesperson. 218 00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:54,154 You can't base who gets new clients on who you're sleeping with that week. 219 00:10:54,237 --> 00:10:56,030 Okay? Okay. 220 00:10:56,114 --> 00:10:58,366 Okay. Okay. 221 00:10:58,449 --> 00:11:02,036 And that is why we waited so long to tell people. 222 00:11:13,256 --> 00:11:14,507 Okay, what's up? 223 00:11:14,591 --> 00:11:16,384 Yeah, okay, I was just... 224 00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:20,638 After the presentation I just wanted to make sure that vis-a-vis me in the office, 225 00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:22,307 everything is business as usual? 226 00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:24,809 Well, it is business, but not as usual. 227 00:11:24,893 --> 00:11:26,477 Yeah, no, I understand. 228 00:11:26,561 --> 00:11:31,149 We're making great strides, we're updating, but business as usual, no? 229 00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:34,861 No. We're throwing out the entire playbook, we're starting from scratch, 230 00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:37,071 we're implementing a brand new system. 231 00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:38,990 Good. So we're on the same page. 232 00:11:39,073 --> 00:11:41,242 No, we're not. 233 00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:43,036 (Grunts) 234 00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:49,667 Michael, I know exactly how much time and manpower are wasted in this branch. 235 00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:53,171 This company is getting younger, faster and more efficient. 236 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,423 You need to prepare yourself. 237 00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:59,219 We had a foreign exchange student live with us when I was young 238 00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:03,473 and we called him my brother and that's what I thought he was. 239 00:12:05,183 --> 00:12:09,604 And then he went home to what is now formerly yugoslavia, 240 00:12:10,313 --> 00:12:13,274 taking all of my blue jeans with him. 241 00:12:13,358 --> 00:12:16,361 And I had to spend the entire winter in shorts. 242 00:12:17,362 --> 00:12:20,281 That is what Ryan is like. 243 00:12:20,365 --> 00:12:22,575 A fake brother who steals your jeans. 244 00:12:27,413 --> 00:12:29,707 So, how are you? 245 00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:32,252 Awesome. I am dating a lot of guys. 246 00:12:32,502 --> 00:12:34,796 Good. A lot. Black guys, mostly. 247 00:12:35,046 --> 00:12:36,506 Kelly. (Loudly) What? 248 00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:40,510 Phyllis: Wait... 249 00:12:40,927 --> 00:12:43,930 How do you touch just one of these buttons at a time? 250 00:12:44,013 --> 00:12:45,390 I don't know. 251 00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:47,308 Did you even try? 252 00:12:47,976 --> 00:12:50,979 If the kid wants to set mine up, I'll let him. 253 00:12:51,062 --> 00:12:52,689 I can't see half the things. 254 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:55,400 It's too little. Use the phone. 255 00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:59,195 Kelly: I want you to tell me that you care about me. That is what I want. 256 00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:01,114 Ryan: Kelly, I'm your boss now, okay? 257 00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:03,283 You can't keep talking to me like I'm your boyfriend. 258 00:13:03,366 --> 00:13:06,619 Oh, big strong man, fancy new whatever. 259 00:13:06,703 --> 00:13:08,013 I don't think you ever cared about me. 260 00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:09,122 I never cared about you? 261 00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:11,165 Six months ago, Karen filippelli sent me an email, 262 00:13:11,249 --> 00:13:12,667 asked me out, I said no, 263 00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:14,436 because I was committed to our relationship. 264 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:17,338 Vveh, I hope you're still committed, because I'm pregnant. 265 00:13:20,550 --> 00:13:23,136 And guess what, buddy? I am keeping it. 266 00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:24,595 Okay. Okay. 267 00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:26,198 Do you feel prepared to help me raise a baby? 268 00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:29,392 I can't... I can't talk about this right now, okay? 269 00:13:29,517 --> 00:13:31,352 After work, we'll go out to dinner. 270 00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,229 We'll talk about it then, okay? 271 00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:38,568 We have a date. 272 00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:45,033 Hello. Hello, Dwight. 273 00:13:45,408 --> 00:13:47,702 I've been thinking about things 274 00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:53,166 and I wanted to know if you would have dinner with me tonight. 275 00:13:53,249 --> 00:13:54,334 Really? 276 00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:55,585 Yes. 277 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:59,130 I'll make a reservation. No, no. Let me cook for you. 278 00:13:59,213 --> 00:14:01,966 Cauliflower and noodles. Baked potato on the side. 279 00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:04,344 I would prefer a public place. 280 00:14:05,553 --> 00:14:06,929 See you after work. 281 00:14:09,390 --> 00:14:10,725 (Sighs) 282 00:14:13,394 --> 00:14:14,979 Hi, Pam. 283 00:14:15,063 --> 00:14:16,564 Is Michael in? In his office. 284 00:14:16,647 --> 00:14:18,191 You can go right in. Okay. 285 00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:19,317 Hey. Jan. 286 00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:22,236 Ryan. Ryan, Ryan, Ryan. 287 00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:26,115 So, elephant in the room, I have your old job. 288 00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:30,745 Well, not exactly my job. I mean, I had a different title. 289 00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:34,040 Oh, well, excuse me. Same office, same responsibilities. 290 00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:37,043 Different salary. You'll get there. Don't worry. 291 00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:39,670 Well, you look great. 292 00:14:39,754 --> 00:14:41,381 Thank you. Thank you. 293 00:14:41,464 --> 00:14:43,383 Scranton suits you. 294 00:14:43,466 --> 00:14:45,218 Best decision I ever made. 295 00:14:46,052 --> 00:14:47,470 You were let go. 296 00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:50,098 You know, I love the beard. Keep it forever. 297 00:14:51,641 --> 00:14:52,934 Michael: Hey. Jan: Hey. 298 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:58,147 What is the actual deal with these things in terms of testicles? 299 00:14:58,231 --> 00:14:59,399 What? 300 00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:03,236 I don't want to grow weird sperm in case we ever want to have kids. 301 00:15:04,487 --> 00:15:06,823 So what's Ryan doing here? 302 00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:09,283 Oh, I don't know. 303 00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:11,536 They're launching a big new business plan, 304 00:15:11,619 --> 00:15:13,413 new website... blah, blah, blah. 305 00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:17,083 He's being a real twerp about it, too. 306 00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:22,296 It's all about youth and agility and streamlining 307 00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:24,060 and trying to squeeze out the older people. 308 00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:26,092 He's such a snake. Well... 309 00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:28,553 I hope he gets hit with an ageism suit. 310 00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:31,013 What is that word? 311 00:15:31,097 --> 00:15:32,640 Ageism? 312 00:15:33,224 --> 00:15:36,936 Companies, they can't discriminate against people due to old age. 313 00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:40,040 Like a couple of years ago, we tried to force out some of the older branch managers 314 00:15:40,064 --> 00:15:41,607 with a mandatory retirement age. 315 00:15:41,691 --> 00:15:43,401 And then ed truck, your old boss, 316 00:15:43,526 --> 00:15:46,529 threatened us with a lawsuit, so we had to back off. 317 00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:49,991 So older people have just as many rights as younger people? 318 00:15:50,074 --> 00:15:51,742 Yes, Michael. 319 00:15:52,743 --> 00:15:53,995 They do. 320 00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,769 Creed? Yes, sir. 321 00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:21,731 Everything okay? Everything's cool, dude. 322 00:16:21,856 --> 00:16:25,026 I'm 30. Well, in November, I'll be 30. 323 00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:29,322 Is there another meeting scheduled? 324 00:16:29,405 --> 00:16:31,216 I was gonna do the BlackBerry tutorial in here. 325 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:34,327 Michael told us to wait in here. We don't know why. 326 00:16:37,079 --> 00:16:38,831 Oh, man. 327 00:16:38,915 --> 00:16:40,541 Good. We're all here. 328 00:16:40,625 --> 00:16:42,335 We can get started. Michael. 329 00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:43,978 Have a seat. We're not doing this today. 330 00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:45,505 Have a seat like everybody else. 331 00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:47,131 Okay. This is... 332 00:16:47,215 --> 00:16:48,799 It's still my office, Ryan. 333 00:16:55,723 --> 00:17:00,561 Well, there has been a lot of talk about new ideas today. 334 00:17:00,645 --> 00:17:03,856 Well, new ideas are fine, 335 00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:06,609 but they are also illegal 336 00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:09,320 because they are a form of ageism. 337 00:17:09,403 --> 00:17:11,697 What? Yes. I am right. 338 00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:18,371 Did you know that, "the age discrimination in employment act of 1967 339 00:17:18,454 --> 00:17:22,333 "prohibits employment discrimination based on age with respect to employees 340 00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:24,377 "40 years of age or older"? 341 00:17:24,460 --> 00:17:25,628 I did. 342 00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:27,380 Mmm. Technically, he's right. 343 00:17:27,463 --> 00:17:28,506 Hey, shut up, Toby. 344 00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:33,427 Look, why do we, as a society, hate old people so much? 345 00:17:33,511 --> 00:17:34,554 Because they're lame. 346 00:17:34,637 --> 00:17:37,473 No! Creed, no, they are not. 347 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:42,019 In fact, many cultures revere old people 348 00:17:42,103 --> 00:17:44,564 because of their storytelling ability. 349 00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:46,440 Like the old lady from Titanic. 350 00:17:46,524 --> 00:17:51,696 Or the funny things that they can do, like, "where's the beef?" 351 00:17:51,779 --> 00:17:53,739 Yeah? Why do you have the big picture up again? 352 00:17:53,823 --> 00:17:55,592 You used that already when you burned your foot. 353 00:17:55,616 --> 00:17:57,034 Reusing the Ben Kingsley, too. 354 00:17:57,118 --> 00:18:00,162 I was going to put up some new pictures, 355 00:18:00,246 --> 00:18:03,249 but all of the ink in the printer was gone. 356 00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:04,750 Pam: Oh. 357 00:18:04,834 --> 00:18:07,670 Michael Scott? That is me. Come on in. 358 00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,214 Who is this old fart? 359 00:18:10,298 --> 00:18:14,635 Did you just stagger off the street out of a box or something? 360 00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:16,637 Who's this worthless bag of bones? 361 00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:21,267 Well, this guy is none other than one of the founders of dunder Mifflin, 362 00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:23,269 Mr. Robert dunder. 363 00:18:23,561 --> 00:18:25,813 Michael: Huh? Oh, yeah. 364 00:18:26,814 --> 00:18:27,982 Yes! 365 00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:30,002 Hi, everyone. Michael, can I talk to you for a second? 366 00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:31,402 Sure thing. 367 00:18:32,278 --> 00:18:33,446 Excuse me. 368 00:18:35,531 --> 00:18:36,574 We have actual work to do. 369 00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:37,992 Fine. 370 00:18:38,075 --> 00:18:40,494 Then I will call David Wallace and you can explain to him 371 00:18:40,578 --> 00:18:43,873 why you threw the founder of the company out on his ancient butt. 372 00:18:47,001 --> 00:18:49,670 Bob, how old are you? 373 00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:51,255 I'm 87. 374 00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:53,799 87 years young. 375 00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:56,427 And still active. That is great. 376 00:18:56,510 --> 00:18:59,847 Did you know that Bob is still a member of the board of dunder Mifflin? 377 00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:03,726 Well, I haven't been to a board meeting in years. 378 00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:05,394 I send a proxy. 379 00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:08,230 Ah! Still sends his own proxy. Good for you. 380 00:19:08,564 --> 00:19:11,192 I'm gonna live for a very long time. 381 00:19:11,275 --> 00:19:13,944 My grandma schrute lived to be 101. 382 00:19:14,028 --> 00:19:16,947 My grandpa manheim is 103, 383 00:19:17,031 --> 00:19:19,575 and still puttering around down in Argentina. 384 00:19:19,825 --> 00:19:21,035 I tried to go visit him once, 385 00:19:21,118 --> 00:19:24,246 but my travel visa was protested by the shoah foundation. 386 00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:27,958 I started this company in 1949. 387 00:19:28,042 --> 00:19:29,043 Wow. 388 00:19:29,126 --> 00:19:32,296 Back then it was an industrial supplier 389 00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:35,591 of metal brackets, mostly, for construction. 390 00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:36,967 Oh, boy. 391 00:19:37,051 --> 00:19:38,386 And then Mifflin, 392 00:19:38,469 --> 00:19:40,554 of course he killed himself later, 393 00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:43,474 uh, but I knew Mifflin through the rotary club. 394 00:19:43,557 --> 00:19:44,642 Great. 395 00:19:44,725 --> 00:19:46,005 Dunder: (Chuckling) And he was... 396 00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:50,106 He was at dinner with Beverly and her husband... 397 00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,899 What was his name? 398 00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:54,985 Jerry. Jerry trupianno... I don't know. 399 00:19:55,069 --> 00:19:59,323 From south Jersey and he was tall. 400 00:19:59,407 --> 00:20:02,076 Both he and Mifflin were tall guys. 401 00:20:02,159 --> 00:20:05,287 Great. That's great. Thank you for coming in. 402 00:20:05,371 --> 00:20:06,997 Robert dunder, everybody. 403 00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:10,209 Thank you. That was wonderful. Do you have a ride? 404 00:20:10,292 --> 00:20:12,712 Well, I came here in a cab. Perfect. 405 00:20:12,795 --> 00:20:14,755 Could you get me that... That's nice. 406 00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:17,675 Inspuafional what have we learned? 407 00:20:17,758 --> 00:20:22,805 Well, we have learned that you can't teach an old dog new tricks, 408 00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:26,225 becauseitsihegal and you will go to jail. 409 00:20:26,308 --> 00:20:27,935 I think that I should help him get home. 410 00:20:28,018 --> 00:20:30,688 No. No, don't help him. He doesn't need help, Pam. 411 00:20:39,071 --> 00:20:40,406 What a nice guy. 412 00:20:41,782 --> 00:20:44,326 (In singsong voice) Good night, guys. 413 00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:47,329 Well, today was a fantastic waste of time. 414 00:20:47,413 --> 00:20:49,415 I disagree. I think it was very valuable. 415 00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:52,960 Michael, technology helps business, okay? You should not resist it. 416 00:20:53,043 --> 00:20:54,443 This is the way the world is moving. 417 00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:57,381 I happen to think that the old ways of doing business are better. 418 00:20:57,465 --> 00:20:59,008 And I can prove it. 419 00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,844 Okay. I look fonnard to hearing your ideas. 420 00:21:03,262 --> 00:21:04,346 Where do you want to go? 421 00:21:04,430 --> 00:21:06,640 I don't know, some place romantic and expensive. 422 00:21:06,724 --> 00:21:08,142 Kelly, come on. 423 00:21:08,225 --> 00:21:09,345 You know what, you're right. 424 00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:13,189 I'm feeling kind of nauseous, anyway. So, you know, skip it. 425 00:21:19,236 --> 00:21:21,655 Dwight: Are you enjoying your vegetarian noodles? 426 00:21:21,739 --> 00:21:23,032 Very much. 427 00:21:23,741 --> 00:21:25,117 How's your meat? 428 00:21:25,201 --> 00:21:27,328 Dry. Delicious. 429 00:21:31,916 --> 00:21:33,125 I heard a joke today. 430 00:21:33,209 --> 00:21:34,877 Oh, that's funny. 431 00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:37,379 Yes, it was. 432 00:21:41,509 --> 00:21:43,719 Are you enjoying your mineral water? 433 00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:46,889 I can't do this. I can't be with you. 434 00:21:47,765 --> 00:21:52,311 Every time I look in your eyes I see sprinkles' stiff, lifeless body. 435 00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:56,982 Then don't look in my eyes. Look right here. It's an old sales trick. 436 00:21:57,066 --> 00:22:00,486 I'm sorry. I gave this everything I could. 437 00:22:00,569 --> 00:22:02,905 No, please don't do this, monkey. 438 00:22:02,988 --> 00:22:06,158 I will leave your toothbrush on top of your tire tomorrow morning. 439 00:22:13,624 --> 00:22:15,334 Smell that. 440 00:22:15,417 --> 00:22:16,752 Do you smell that? 441 00:22:16,836 --> 00:22:17,878 Dry rot? 442 00:22:17,962 --> 00:22:21,048 No, Dwight, that smells like good business to me. 443 00:22:21,131 --> 00:22:22,883 What I have done here is I have collected 444 00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:26,804 all the finest gourmet items that Scranton has to offer. 445 00:22:26,887 --> 00:22:28,681 (Chuckling) Sweet, chocolate turtles. 446 00:22:28,764 --> 00:22:31,809 Yes. No, no, those are for our clients. 447 00:22:31,892 --> 00:22:34,019 Actually, our ex-clients. I'll explain later. 448 00:22:34,103 --> 00:22:39,149 Ryan wants everything in our company to be about emails and ims, 449 00:22:39,233 --> 00:22:44,154 but I think he is forgetting about the original instant message, 450 00:22:46,115 --> 00:22:49,535 letters attached to baskets of food. 451 00:22:55,583 --> 00:22:58,627 Excuse me, Angela. Michael asked me to turn in these receipts 452 00:22:58,711 --> 00:23:00,713 for these gift basket items. 453 00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:02,798 Thank you. You're welcome. 454 00:23:05,259 --> 00:23:07,011 Isthatah? Yes. 455 00:23:10,472 --> 00:23:11,765 I miss you. 456 00:23:12,266 --> 00:23:13,434 Elevators. 457 00:23:14,101 --> 00:23:16,687 Dwight, you have to listen to me. 458 00:23:16,770 --> 00:23:20,858 We are not seeing each other anymore. Can you accept that? 459 00:23:23,235 --> 00:23:24,612 Fine. 460 00:23:25,321 --> 00:23:26,947 Then I just want to be friends. 461 00:23:27,031 --> 00:23:28,032 Good. 462 00:23:28,115 --> 00:23:30,701 Plus a little extra. Also, I love you. 463 00:23:33,454 --> 00:23:34,496 (Angela sighs) 464 00:23:34,580 --> 00:23:35,724 I don't understand what the big deal is. 465 00:23:35,748 --> 00:23:36,749 You don't? No. 466 00:23:36,832 --> 00:23:38,542 You lied about being pregnant. Right. So? 467 00:23:38,626 --> 00:23:41,021 You really don't understand why that might make me kind of angry? 468 00:23:41,045 --> 00:23:43,255 We're never getting back together. No. 469 00:23:43,339 --> 00:23:44,590 Why not? 470 00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:48,344 Hey. 471 00:23:48,928 --> 00:23:50,012 Hey. 472 00:23:51,889 --> 00:23:55,225 All right, I just have to ask, now that we're public, 473 00:23:56,977 --> 00:23:58,646 is the magic gone? 474 00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:02,942 It's funny you bring that up because, yes, it is. 475 00:24:04,068 --> 00:24:08,364 I knew it. Oh, man. Just like that, huh? 476 00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:12,493 I think, I mean, I don't know what it is, but... 477 00:24:13,118 --> 00:24:16,789 Be honest. I now find you repulsive. 478 00:24:16,872 --> 00:24:18,290 That's honest. 479 00:24:18,374 --> 00:24:19,375 (Sighing) 480 00:24:19,458 --> 00:24:21,377 All right. Fair enough. 481 00:24:24,296 --> 00:24:26,966 It was really fun while it lasted, though, wasn't it? 482 00:24:27,049 --> 00:24:28,509 (Indifferently) Yeah. 483 00:24:28,592 --> 00:24:30,135 For me it was. 484 00:24:30,219 --> 00:24:31,595 Okay. 485 00:24:31,679 --> 00:24:32,930 All right. 486 00:24:37,226 --> 00:24:38,852 Yeah. 487 00:24:38,936 --> 00:24:41,230 Hey, boss, I didn't know you were coming in today. 488 00:24:41,313 --> 00:24:43,065 What is going on here? 489 00:24:43,148 --> 00:24:44,316 I am glad that you asked. 490 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:46,235 Listen up, everybody. 491 00:24:46,318 --> 00:24:50,864 In the last year, we have lost seven clients to the big chains. 492 00:24:50,948 --> 00:24:54,743 These gift baskets are our ticket back into their lives. 493 00:24:54,827 --> 00:24:56,161 We are going to show up 494 00:24:56,245 --> 00:25:00,290 at these businesses unannounced and we are going to win them back. 495 00:25:00,374 --> 00:25:01,375 With gift baskets? 496 00:25:01,458 --> 00:25:03,460 With peanut brittle, 497 00:25:03,627 --> 00:25:08,590 with macadamia nut cookies, with chocolate turtles, 498 00:25:08,841 --> 00:25:14,179 with raspberryjam, and a little bit of fat and salt. 499 00:25:14,430 --> 00:25:16,932 Because you know what? That's what people like. 500 00:25:17,016 --> 00:25:18,767 Ever since I was a kid, 501 00:25:18,851 --> 00:25:21,061 people have been telling me that I can't do things. 502 00:25:21,145 --> 00:25:22,938 "You can't be on the team. 503 00:25:23,022 --> 00:25:24,857 "You can't move on to second grade." 504 00:25:24,940 --> 00:25:29,069 Well, now they're telling me that I can't win back clients 505 00:25:29,153 --> 00:25:31,488 using old-fashioned business methods. 506 00:25:31,572 --> 00:25:33,115 We'll see about that. 507 00:25:34,408 --> 00:25:38,954 And fyi, I eventually aced second grade, and I was the biggest kid in class. 508 00:25:40,289 --> 00:25:45,294 Okay, we're gonna split up into teams. Jim, Phyllis. Stanley, Dwight. Me, Andy. 509 00:25:45,627 --> 00:25:47,296 I'm not driving with him. 510 00:25:47,379 --> 00:25:49,048 I'll go with you, Stanley. Or him. 511 00:25:49,131 --> 00:25:50,233 Why don't we just go by ourselves? 512 00:25:50,257 --> 00:25:53,594 Why don't we just go as teams to demonstrate our teamsmanship? 513 00:25:53,677 --> 00:25:54,762 Phyllis: Michael? Yes. 514 00:25:54,845 --> 00:25:56,513 This is stupid. Well, that's... okay. 515 00:25:56,597 --> 00:25:58,140 That's not helpful, Phyllis. 516 00:25:58,223 --> 00:26:01,101 How is giving people gift baskets going to get our clients back? 517 00:26:01,185 --> 00:26:03,353 Gift baskets are amazing, Phyllis. 518 00:26:03,437 --> 00:26:06,106 Gift baskets are 519 00:26:07,483 --> 00:26:10,444 the essence of class and fanciness. 520 00:26:10,527 --> 00:26:13,197 They are the ultimate present that a person can receive. 521 00:26:13,280 --> 00:26:15,425 What about cash? With cash you can buy whatever you want, 522 00:26:15,449 --> 00:26:19,328 including a gift basket. So, it's kind of the best gift ever. 523 00:26:19,411 --> 00:26:21,038 What about a gift basket full of cash? 524 00:26:21,121 --> 00:26:23,874 Yes. Cash basket. Nice work, tuna. 525 00:26:23,957 --> 00:26:25,417 Fine. I'm just gonna go by myself. 526 00:26:25,501 --> 00:26:29,755 And I am going to win them back by myself because this is important to me. 527 00:26:30,547 --> 00:26:32,049 Michael, wait. 528 00:26:32,591 --> 00:26:33,801 Let me go. 529 00:26:34,927 --> 00:26:36,345 No, this is my quest. 530 00:26:36,428 --> 00:26:38,806 Please. Let me go. 531 00:26:38,889 --> 00:26:41,934 I need to win those clients back. 532 00:26:42,476 --> 00:26:43,519 Please. 533 00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:44,853 Michael: Fine. 534 00:26:44,937 --> 00:26:48,232 Then godspeed to both of us. 535 00:26:49,274 --> 00:26:50,984 Good luck, Michael. 536 00:26:51,068 --> 00:26:53,320 We don't need luck. 537 00:26:53,403 --> 00:26:55,364 Dwight: Yeah. But thank you. 538 00:26:55,447 --> 00:26:57,342 That was really nice of you to say. Dwight: Thank you. 539 00:26:57,366 --> 00:26:59,868 Business to business, the old-fashioned way, 540 00:26:59,952 --> 00:27:02,371 no blackberries, no websites. 541 00:27:03,705 --> 00:27:07,835 I would like to see a website deliver baskets of food to people. 542 00:27:10,254 --> 00:27:11,755 Yes, I understand that, David. 543 00:27:11,839 --> 00:27:14,258 I just felt that if we were to downsize Kelly 544 00:27:14,341 --> 00:27:18,137 and then outsource customer service to India, which a lot of companies... 545 00:27:18,679 --> 00:27:21,515 Yeah. No. Yes, Kelly is Indian. 546 00:27:21,598 --> 00:27:23,642 I understand that's confusing. 547 00:27:24,518 --> 00:27:26,353 Hey, bro, I've been meaning to ask you, 548 00:27:26,436 --> 00:27:28,438 can we get some red bull for these things? 549 00:27:28,522 --> 00:27:32,609 Sometimes a guy's got to ride the bull. Am I right? Later, skater. 550 00:27:35,821 --> 00:27:38,365 Sweet ride. American-made. 551 00:27:38,448 --> 00:27:39,783 What happened to the sebring? 552 00:27:39,867 --> 00:27:42,077 It is in the body shop. 553 00:27:42,744 --> 00:27:45,223 I had to have the dent taken out of the hood where I hit Meredith. 554 00:27:45,247 --> 00:27:46,456 Oh, that's a pain in the ass. 555 00:27:46,540 --> 00:27:47,624 I know. 556 00:27:47,708 --> 00:27:49,501 So, who's next? Larry meyers. 557 00:27:49,585 --> 00:27:52,504 Left us six months ago for office depot. 558 00:27:52,588 --> 00:27:56,717 Female voice: Proceed to the highlighted route, then route guidance will begin. 559 00:27:56,800 --> 00:27:58,177 Why do you use that thing? 560 00:27:58,260 --> 00:28:00,137 It lets them know where you are at all times. 561 00:28:00,220 --> 00:28:01,388 Who? 562 00:28:01,471 --> 00:28:05,601 The government, spy satellites, private detectives, 563 00:28:06,393 --> 00:28:07,936 ex-girlfriends. 564 00:28:10,230 --> 00:28:11,648 (Sobbing) 565 00:28:15,777 --> 00:28:16,778 (Sobbing continues) 566 00:28:17,196 --> 00:28:20,782 Next night, I'm out at a bar, 2:00 am. I figure I'll get a sandwich, 567 00:28:20,866 --> 00:28:23,035 'cause you can get a sandwich any time of the night, 568 00:28:23,118 --> 00:28:24,745 I run into Vince Vaughn. 569 00:28:24,828 --> 00:28:26,205 No way. 570 00:28:26,288 --> 00:28:27,372 Literally. 571 00:28:27,456 --> 00:28:30,083 Dude, you are so money, 572 00:28:30,167 --> 00:28:33,045 but you don't even know it, but you do. 573 00:28:34,713 --> 00:28:36,256 Yeah. Later, guys. 574 00:28:36,340 --> 00:28:38,467 Later, dude. Later, man. 575 00:28:39,885 --> 00:28:41,178 (Sighs in amazement) 576 00:28:41,261 --> 00:28:45,599 Jim, how awesome is Ryan now? 577 00:28:45,682 --> 00:28:48,018 Yeah. He's definitely something. 578 00:28:48,685 --> 00:28:49,728 What does that mean? 579 00:28:49,811 --> 00:28:53,106 That whole lifestyle, his whole vibe, you find that appealing? 580 00:28:53,190 --> 00:28:54,358 (Scoffs) 581 00:28:54,441 --> 00:28:55,525 Tuna. 582 00:28:55,609 --> 00:28:57,027 (Inhales deeply) 583 00:28:57,110 --> 00:28:58,237 Tuna, tuna, tuna. 584 00:28:58,320 --> 00:28:59,863 Tuna, tuna, tuna. 585 00:29:00,322 --> 00:29:03,617 He has a killerjob. He's rich. 586 00:29:03,700 --> 00:29:07,537 He smells like what I think Pierce brosnan probably smells like. 587 00:29:07,621 --> 00:29:10,207 He wears really cool rich-guy clothes. 588 00:29:10,290 --> 00:29:13,877 And he can get any girl that he wants. 589 00:29:13,961 --> 00:29:17,339 So, I'm sorry, tuna, but if you don't know why that's awesome, 590 00:29:17,631 --> 00:29:18,715 then 591 00:29:19,925 --> 00:29:21,718 you need awesome lessons. 592 00:29:21,802 --> 00:29:23,971 Tuna, check you later. 593 00:29:25,055 --> 00:29:27,683 'Cause he's so money that he doesn't even know it. 594 00:29:27,766 --> 00:29:30,185 Wow, those things are heavy. 595 00:29:30,936 --> 00:29:32,354 There's a lot of stuff in there. 596 00:29:32,437 --> 00:29:36,608 We have macadamia nut cookies, 597 00:29:37,401 --> 00:29:39,194 the honey mustard pretzels. 598 00:29:39,278 --> 00:29:42,072 Have you ever tried focaccia crisps? 599 00:29:42,155 --> 00:29:43,925 You know we closed our account with you, right? 600 00:29:43,949 --> 00:29:45,993 Yes. We do. We're with office depot now. 601 00:29:46,076 --> 00:29:47,703 Yes. Yes. Yes, we know. 602 00:29:47,786 --> 00:29:50,038 But we just have not gotten over you. Well... 603 00:29:50,122 --> 00:29:53,208 And we are dedicated to providing you with the very best customer service... 604 00:29:53,292 --> 00:29:54,584 This is... the very best 605 00:29:54,668 --> 00:29:57,254 personal business relationship... that's exactly right. 606 00:29:57,337 --> 00:29:59,840 We can if you ever decide to come back to us. 607 00:29:59,923 --> 00:30:02,384 Okay. I don't think we're coming back. 608 00:30:02,467 --> 00:30:04,803 Please come back. Okay, you know what? 609 00:30:04,886 --> 00:30:06,596 Just enjoy the gift basket 610 00:30:06,680 --> 00:30:10,183 and remember that we provide a personal touch. 611 00:30:10,267 --> 00:30:11,977 Remember what we had, Larry. 612 00:30:12,060 --> 00:30:13,812 I mean, really, it's about money. 613 00:30:13,895 --> 00:30:16,023 Well, just enjoy the gift basket. 614 00:30:16,732 --> 00:30:18,358 Okay, thanks. All right. 615 00:30:18,442 --> 00:30:20,322 I mean, their website's really easy to use, too. 616 00:30:20,402 --> 00:30:22,112 That's a big deal for us. 617 00:30:23,113 --> 00:30:25,365 That guy was so... 618 00:30:26,616 --> 00:30:28,535 How can they not know how much better we are? 619 00:30:28,618 --> 00:30:30,912 I don't know. Sometimes people are just impossible 620 00:30:30,996 --> 00:30:32,706 and they make you miserable. That is true. 621 00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:34,207 Like Angela in accounting. 622 00:30:34,291 --> 00:30:35,459 Yes. She is nuts. 623 00:30:35,542 --> 00:30:36,585 (Groans) 624 00:30:36,668 --> 00:30:39,463 No, she's wonderful ataccounfing. 625 00:30:39,963 --> 00:30:41,631 But she drives me crazy. 626 00:30:42,924 --> 00:30:44,968 Female voice: Make the next right turn. 627 00:30:45,052 --> 00:30:47,346 How do they know? How does this know where to turn? 628 00:30:47,429 --> 00:30:49,056 That's very impressive. 629 00:30:49,681 --> 00:30:50,974 Hey, Pam, 630 00:30:51,058 --> 00:30:54,311 I haven't settled on a final design logo yet for dunder Mifflin infinity 631 00:30:54,394 --> 00:30:56,188 and I know you're into graphic design. 632 00:30:56,271 --> 00:30:58,857 Do you want to give it a shot? Maybe try and design the logo. 633 00:30:58,940 --> 00:31:00,567 Totally. Cool. 634 00:31:00,650 --> 00:31:02,486 That would be great. 635 00:31:02,611 --> 00:31:04,738 Can you do a couple mock-ups and I'll take a look? 636 00:31:04,821 --> 00:31:05,864 Yeah. Thank you very much. 637 00:31:05,947 --> 00:31:06,990 Thank you. Cool. 638 00:31:07,074 --> 00:31:08,158 Okay. 639 00:31:13,872 --> 00:31:18,752 Yeah, I'm going to do some mock-ups and then turn those into thumbnails, 640 00:31:18,919 --> 00:31:22,714 maybe do some splash frames... 641 00:31:22,798 --> 00:31:25,717 I don't know what I'm talking about, but I'm excited. 642 00:31:26,093 --> 00:31:29,554 And the last guy says, "no, hairy body." 643 00:31:29,638 --> 00:31:31,056 You know, I have heard it before. 644 00:31:31,139 --> 00:31:34,309 Ah. Well, it's still very good. 645 00:31:34,393 --> 00:31:35,394 (Man chuckling) 646 00:31:35,477 --> 00:31:37,979 I bet I know someone who hasn't heard thatjoke, 647 00:31:38,063 --> 00:31:39,523 your daughter Emily. 648 00:31:39,606 --> 00:31:40,690 How's she doing? 649 00:31:40,774 --> 00:31:43,193 She's great. Thanks for asking. 650 00:31:43,276 --> 00:31:44,820 Great memory, by the way. 651 00:31:44,903 --> 00:31:47,197 Is she gonna be, like, 11 this winter? 652 00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:49,699 Wow. They grow up so fast. 653 00:31:49,825 --> 00:31:52,369 I have a few of my own that I want someday. 654 00:31:53,995 --> 00:31:55,598 Listen, I don't want to take any more of your time. 655 00:31:55,622 --> 00:31:56,766 I know you're a very busy man. 656 00:31:56,790 --> 00:31:59,292 The reason we have stopped by is to drop you off 657 00:31:59,376 --> 00:32:04,339 this elaborate bag of goodies and to ask you to reconsider. 658 00:32:04,423 --> 00:32:05,841 (Chuckling) Okay. 659 00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:08,343 Okay. Okay. So you'll reconsider? 660 00:32:08,635 --> 00:32:10,345 Okay, thanks for the goodies. 661 00:32:17,102 --> 00:32:19,271 Isthatah you have to say? 662 00:32:20,730 --> 00:32:22,858 It looks delicious. I don't know. 663 00:32:22,941 --> 00:32:24,484 You don't know? 664 00:32:25,652 --> 00:32:28,780 Look, we want you back. 665 00:32:29,948 --> 00:32:31,283 Can you offer lower prices? 666 00:32:31,366 --> 00:32:32,534 Well, no. 667 00:32:32,617 --> 00:32:33,845 Well, then, we're not coming back. 668 00:32:33,869 --> 00:32:35,304 He's not coming back. It's over, Michael. 669 00:32:35,328 --> 00:32:36,705 No, it's not. No, he's right. 670 00:32:36,788 --> 00:32:38,373 No. Accept it. Why would he come back? 671 00:32:38,457 --> 00:32:40,917 Why would he come back? I will tell you, Dwight. 672 00:32:41,001 --> 00:32:45,630 He would come back because we offer a wide selection of products, 673 00:32:45,714 --> 00:32:48,526 and because you're definitely not getting the same sort of customer service 674 00:32:48,550 --> 00:32:49,610 that you get with us, are you? 675 00:32:49,634 --> 00:32:50,903 That's not gonna change his mind. 676 00:32:50,927 --> 00:32:53,930 He's moving on. We had our chance and we killed it. 677 00:32:56,850 --> 00:32:58,143 (Sighs) 678 00:32:59,144 --> 00:33:00,395 Look. 679 00:33:03,273 --> 00:33:06,109 We're also coming out with a website soon. 680 00:33:06,193 --> 00:33:08,028 It's a state-of-the-art thing. 681 00:33:08,111 --> 00:33:10,113 It'll be up and running. 682 00:33:10,947 --> 00:33:15,827 It's gonna cut costs, and itwill make ordering much, much easier. 683 00:33:15,911 --> 00:33:18,246 Okay. Well, when it's up, I'll check it out, 684 00:33:18,330 --> 00:33:21,208 and if it really cuts costs, maybe we'll come back. 685 00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:24,503 Great. The magic of the gift basket. 686 00:33:24,586 --> 00:33:26,129 That I don't care about as much. 687 00:33:26,213 --> 00:33:27,273 Let me know when the site's up. 688 00:33:27,297 --> 00:33:29,424 Okay. Good. 689 00:33:30,175 --> 00:33:33,553 Don't let Emily have any of the cajun almonds. She's allergic. 690 00:33:35,931 --> 00:33:37,849 Female voice: Proceed straight. 691 00:33:37,933 --> 00:33:39,935 Well, we're 0 for 6. 692 00:33:40,018 --> 00:33:42,270 Lastchanceisthe elmhurst country club. 693 00:33:42,938 --> 00:33:44,773 Other side of the lake on the southeast side. 694 00:33:44,856 --> 00:33:46,274 (Sighing) I don't get it. 695 00:33:46,358 --> 00:33:49,277 I really don't get it. I thought this would work. 696 00:33:49,736 --> 00:33:52,030 I threw everything I had at that guy and nothing. 697 00:33:52,113 --> 00:33:54,366 That's how it goes sometimes, you know? 698 00:33:54,449 --> 00:33:57,827 You lose everything and everything falls apart 699 00:33:57,911 --> 00:33:59,704 and eventually you die 700 00:33:59,788 --> 00:34:00,997 and no one remembers you. 701 00:34:01,081 --> 00:34:02,624 That is a very good point, Dwight. 702 00:34:02,707 --> 00:34:04,376 Female voice: Make a right turn. 703 00:34:05,085 --> 00:34:08,380 Wait, wait. No, no, no. It means bear right. 704 00:34:08,463 --> 00:34:11,383 No. It said right. It said take a right. Up there. 705 00:34:11,466 --> 00:34:12,676 No, no, no, look. 706 00:34:12,759 --> 00:34:16,513 It means go up to the right, bear right over the bridge 707 00:34:16,596 --> 00:34:17,597 and hook up with 307. 708 00:34:17,681 --> 00:34:19,575 Female voice: Make a right turn. Maybe it's a shortcut, Dwight. 709 00:34:19,599 --> 00:34:20,600 It said go to the right. 710 00:34:20,684 --> 00:34:21,685 It can't mean that. 711 00:34:21,768 --> 00:34:22,828 There's a lake there! I think it 712 00:34:22,852 --> 00:34:24,413 knows where it is going. This is the lake! 713 00:34:24,437 --> 00:34:25,706 The machine knows! This is the lake! 714 00:34:25,730 --> 00:34:27,107 Stop yelling at me! No! 715 00:34:27,190 --> 00:34:29,734 Stop yelling! There's no road here! 716 00:34:31,736 --> 00:34:33,989 Remain calm. I have trained for this. 717 00:34:34,364 --> 00:34:35,490 Okay. 718 00:34:35,574 --> 00:34:37,367 Exit the window! Here we go. 719 00:34:37,450 --> 00:34:40,078 Female voice: Make a u-turn, if possible. 720 00:34:40,161 --> 00:34:42,205 Look out for leeches! 721 00:34:42,289 --> 00:34:44,833 Michael! Are you okay? 722 00:34:44,958 --> 00:34:49,129 Swim for it! I got you.Lgotyou. 723 00:34:50,171 --> 00:34:52,215 Oh, god. 724 00:34:52,299 --> 00:34:54,259 Michael! Michael! 725 00:34:54,342 --> 00:34:55,594 Let go. Let go of me. 726 00:34:55,677 --> 00:34:56,886 Michael. 727 00:34:59,180 --> 00:35:01,683 Dwight: I got you! I got you! 728 00:35:02,100 --> 00:35:04,936 Come on. Come on. Come on. 729 00:35:07,397 --> 00:35:08,607 Come on. 730 00:35:33,214 --> 00:35:34,591 You sure you're okay? 731 00:35:34,674 --> 00:35:35,967 Fine. 732 00:35:36,051 --> 00:35:39,387 Good. That is what's most important. 733 00:35:40,221 --> 00:35:42,557 Did you get the rental insurance? 734 00:35:42,807 --> 00:35:45,727 Because that is pretty important, too, at a time like this. 735 00:35:53,610 --> 00:35:56,071 What a disaster. This whole thing. 736 00:35:57,280 --> 00:35:58,865 I'll call a cab. 737 00:35:58,948 --> 00:36:03,745 These people just don't realize what a gift basket means. They don't get it. 738 00:36:03,828 --> 00:36:05,872 Look at that. Still works. Old-fashioned cell phone. 739 00:36:05,955 --> 00:36:09,125 Yeah. What about that last guy, Aaron? 740 00:36:09,209 --> 00:36:12,962 Boy, is he a jerk. I don't even know if I want it. 741 00:36:13,046 --> 00:36:15,215 "Their website is so easy." 742 00:36:15,298 --> 00:36:18,968 Yeah, well, you can have your technology, jackass. 743 00:36:19,052 --> 00:36:20,095 Look where it got us. 744 00:36:20,178 --> 00:36:22,514 Yes, we need a cab at lake Scranton 745 00:36:22,597 --> 00:36:25,141 at the end of east mountain road, inthelake. 746 00:36:25,225 --> 00:36:26,476 Hang up. 747 00:36:27,227 --> 00:36:28,978 You know what we're gonna do? 748 00:36:29,062 --> 00:36:30,689 We're walking back. 749 00:36:30,772 --> 00:36:32,482 We're walking back to that office 750 00:36:32,565 --> 00:36:35,985 and we're going to reclaim our gift basket. 751 00:36:36,069 --> 00:36:39,072 Yes. We're going to take what's rightfully ours. 752 00:36:39,155 --> 00:36:41,366 We're gonna take a stand, Dwight. 753 00:36:43,076 --> 00:36:44,994 We're gonna take a stand! Take a stand! 754 00:36:45,328 --> 00:36:47,640 So it plays on the infinity thing without being obvious, you know? 755 00:36:47,664 --> 00:36:49,165 Ryan: Yeah. Definitely. 756 00:36:49,249 --> 00:36:51,167 I'd love to do like a color version, 757 00:36:51,251 --> 00:36:53,420 just bring a little color to it. I like it a lot. 758 00:36:53,503 --> 00:36:55,505 It's clear and subtle at the same time. 759 00:36:55,588 --> 00:36:58,174 It's really good. You have a real talent for this stuff. 760 00:36:58,258 --> 00:37:00,802 Thanks. I'd love to talk to you about it more. 761 00:37:00,885 --> 00:37:01,970 That would be great. 762 00:37:02,053 --> 00:37:04,139 Do you want to go out to dinner tonight? 763 00:37:05,390 --> 00:37:06,891 Oh, is it... 764 00:37:06,975 --> 00:37:08,727 Wear something nice. No. 765 00:37:08,810 --> 00:37:09,894 What? 766 00:37:10,395 --> 00:37:11,688 I just... I'm sorry. 767 00:37:11,771 --> 00:37:13,231 I just want to have dinner. 768 00:37:13,565 --> 00:37:15,942 I'm dating Jim. 769 00:37:17,402 --> 00:37:18,903 You're kidding. 770 00:37:22,532 --> 00:37:23,825 We're together. 771 00:37:24,951 --> 00:37:28,872 That's great. I... That's awesome. 772 00:37:28,955 --> 00:37:30,331 Yeah. Great. 773 00:37:34,669 --> 00:37:36,129 So, let me... yeah. 774 00:37:36,254 --> 00:37:38,381 Let me look at these. Okay. Great. 775 00:37:38,465 --> 00:37:39,883 Cool. Great. 776 00:37:47,849 --> 00:37:51,853 I guess he can't get any girl he wants. 777 00:38:01,196 --> 00:38:04,073 Did you forget something? What happened to you guys? 778 00:38:04,157 --> 00:38:05,575 Give it back. 779 00:38:07,702 --> 00:38:09,329 The gift basket. Give it back. 780 00:38:09,412 --> 00:38:10,455 Oh, what is this? 781 00:38:10,538 --> 00:38:11,706 It's real simple. 782 00:38:11,790 --> 00:38:15,710 If you don't appreciate what we do, then give us back our basket. 783 00:38:15,794 --> 00:38:17,796 Maybe you should leave. 784 00:38:17,879 --> 00:38:20,048 Yeah. Maybe we should... 785 00:38:20,131 --> 00:38:22,258 Maybe we should leave. Come on, let's leave. 786 00:38:22,342 --> 00:38:23,426 But before we leave, 787 00:38:23,510 --> 00:38:28,264 my wet friend and I are gonna wait for our cabs on your nice couches. 788 00:38:28,348 --> 00:38:31,518 Can you call us a cab, please? I'm gonna... sorry. 789 00:38:31,601 --> 00:38:33,311 Michael: My clothes are so wet. 790 00:38:33,394 --> 00:38:34,771 Dwight: Nice leather. 791 00:38:34,854 --> 00:38:37,315 Oh, my shoes are so muddy. 792 00:38:37,398 --> 00:38:39,984 All right, here you go. Take it back. 793 00:38:40,068 --> 00:38:41,653 It's been opened. Yeah, it was mine. 794 00:38:41,736 --> 00:38:45,156 What's missing? The turtles. 795 00:38:45,448 --> 00:38:46,509 Summer sausage. Where are the turtles? 796 00:38:46,533 --> 00:38:48,552 Where are the turtles? Come on, guys, get out of here. 797 00:38:48,576 --> 00:38:53,331 Where are the turtles? Where are they? 798 00:38:53,414 --> 00:38:54,558 Excuse me, I have an announcement to make. 799 00:38:54,582 --> 00:38:57,502 We seem to be missing a box of chocolate turtles with pecans 800 00:38:57,585 --> 00:39:00,129 and we will not be leaving the premises until we obtain them. 801 00:39:00,213 --> 00:39:03,716 Hand over the turtles now! 802 00:39:04,300 --> 00:39:07,220 I ate them, okay? I ate the turtles. They're gone. 803 00:39:20,567 --> 00:39:22,068 We'll bill you. 804 00:39:25,488 --> 00:39:27,407 May I have your attention, please? 805 00:39:27,490 --> 00:39:31,494 This office will not be using any new technology ever. 806 00:39:31,578 --> 00:39:33,663 Starting now. That is not correct. 807 00:39:33,746 --> 00:39:38,167 Ryan thinks that technology is the answer. Well, guess what? 808 00:39:38,251 --> 00:39:40,211 I just drove my car into a lake. 809 00:39:40,295 --> 00:39:41,462 You did what? 810 00:39:41,546 --> 00:39:45,592 I drove my car into a (bleep) Lake. 811 00:39:46,885 --> 00:39:49,679 Why, you may ask, did I do this? 812 00:39:49,762 --> 00:39:51,973 Well, because of a machine. 813 00:39:52,056 --> 00:39:56,644 A machine told me to drive into a lake. And I did it. 814 00:39:56,728 --> 00:40:01,107 I did it because I trusted Ryan's precious technology. 815 00:40:01,190 --> 00:40:02,317 And look where it got me. 816 00:40:02,400 --> 00:40:03,401 Into a lake. 817 00:40:03,484 --> 00:40:04,485 Exactly. 818 00:40:04,569 --> 00:40:06,571 Did you get any clients back? 819 00:40:06,738 --> 00:40:08,781 Maybe. Maybe not. 820 00:40:08,865 --> 00:40:10,158 Time will tell. 821 00:40:10,825 --> 00:40:13,578 But I will tell you one thing, those gift baskets 822 00:40:13,661 --> 00:40:16,331 never endangered anybody's lives. 823 00:40:20,209 --> 00:40:21,836 Game, set, match. 824 00:40:23,338 --> 00:40:26,966 Point. Scott. Game over. 825 00:40:29,218 --> 00:40:30,470 End of game. 826 00:40:39,145 --> 00:40:40,772 (Bottles rattling) 827 00:40:41,481 --> 00:40:44,400 Michael: Everyone always wants new things. 828 00:40:44,943 --> 00:40:48,863 Everybody likes new inventions, new technology. 829 00:40:49,405 --> 00:40:52,158 People will never be replaced by machines. 830 00:40:52,241 --> 00:40:56,537 In the end, life and business are about human connections. 831 00:40:57,747 --> 00:41:01,918 And computers are about trying to murder you in a lake. 832 00:41:02,794 --> 00:41:04,963 And to me the choice is easy. 833 00:41:08,299 --> 00:41:12,804 I'm not saying I had a meteoric rise, but I did. 834 00:41:13,513 --> 00:41:17,350 And if they knew how much I was paying for my haircut now, 835 00:41:17,433 --> 00:41:19,644 they wouldn't be giving me a noogie. 836 00:41:20,853 --> 00:41:22,188 It was $200.