1
00:00:02,086 --> 00:00:04,005
Attention, everyone!

2
00:00:04,088 --> 00:00:06,066
Jim and I, on behalf of the
party planning committee

3
00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:08,009
have an... tooloud.
Too, tooloud.Tooloud.

4
00:00:08,092 --> 00:00:12,430
But effective. Look. On behalf
of Jim and I, merry Christmas.

5
00:00:14,265 --> 00:00:15,349
All: Merry Christmas.

6
00:00:15,433 --> 00:00:16,684
Merry Christmas. Good.

7
00:00:16,767 --> 00:00:19,729
My diabolical plot is
on hold for Christmas.

8
00:00:20,271 --> 00:00:24,066
My heart just melts with
the sound of children singing.

9
00:00:27,528 --> 00:00:31,449
Not really. I'm just tired. The
days are short. I don't know.

10
00:00:31,949 --> 00:00:33,743
Maybe I'm depressed.

11
00:00:34,118 --> 00:00:35,745
It is time to unveil the tree.

12
00:00:35,828 --> 00:00:36,996
Hey, rockefeller center!

13
00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:38,164
Jim: Yeah.

14
00:00:38,247 --> 00:00:39,641
Uh, I've actually
been to rock center

15
00:00:39,665 --> 00:00:40,767
and this is nothing like that.

16
00:00:40,791 --> 00:00:42,251
This is all we have. Ugh!

17
00:00:42,335 --> 00:00:43,753
Nope, it's not "ugh."

18
00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:46,047
It is office camaraderie.

19
00:00:46,130 --> 00:00:47,298
It is warm feelings.

20
00:00:47,381 --> 00:00:49,234
Why don't we talk more
about it instead of doing it?

21
00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:51,886
Thirty, 29, 28...

22
00:00:52,011 --> 00:00:53,447
Why would you
start so high? ...27...

23
00:00:53,471 --> 00:00:54,472
Three, two, one.

24
00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:55,556
26...

25
00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:56,766
Phyllis: Ooh!

26
00:00:56,849 --> 00:00:58,059
You didn't decorate it.

27
00:00:58,142 --> 00:00:59,142
Exactly.

28
00:00:59,185 --> 00:01:02,230
We didn't, because we think it
would be better to do it together.

29
00:01:02,313 --> 00:01:04,190
Everyone. Why would
you wrap it in a sheet

30
00:01:04,273 --> 00:01:06,317
if you're not
covering anything up?

31
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,319
Is... is it fake? Pam.

32
00:01:08,486 --> 00:01:13,491
Yes! We are unveiling an
artificial tree that will never die.

33
00:01:13,616 --> 00:01:15,785
Yes. Like the
spirit of Christmas.

34
00:01:15,868 --> 00:01:17,137
And we're supposed
to applaud you

35
00:01:17,161 --> 00:01:19,163
for taking a giant
diaper off a fake tree?

36
00:01:19,247 --> 00:01:22,416
This was a successful
unveiling! Go back to work!

37
00:01:22,541 --> 00:01:24,168
Merry Christmas.

38
00:01:45,147 --> 00:01:48,025
Hello. Sorry, guys. Sorry, guys.

39
00:01:48,192 --> 00:01:51,112
I'm not sure I've earned the
right to make announcements yet,

40
00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:53,572
but whoever is giving me
the 12 days of Christmas

41
00:01:53,656 --> 00:01:55,449
as my secret Santa,

42
00:01:55,783 --> 00:02:01,372
please stop. I can't take it
anymore. My cat killed a turtledove.

43
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:05,042
The French hens have started
pulling out my hair to make a nest.

44
00:02:05,126 --> 00:02:06,794
Please stop.

45
00:02:06,877 --> 00:02:08,879
What psycho would
send that as a gift?

46
00:02:12,925 --> 00:02:15,970
I begged Dwight and Jim to
give me Erin for secret Santa,

47
00:02:16,053 --> 00:02:18,347
and I decided to give Erin
the 12 days of Christmas.

48
00:02:18,431 --> 00:02:19,598
Bowtie time.

49
00:02:19,682 --> 00:02:23,686
Is it my fault that the first eight
days there's basically 30 birds?

50
00:02:24,103 --> 00:02:25,396
Ho! Ho! Ho!

51
00:02:25,479 --> 00:02:30,151
Merry Christmas, boys and
girls. It's me, Santa claus.

52
00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:31,694
Hey, Santa.

53
00:02:31,944 --> 00:02:33,446
Theyfinahy ietyou do it yeah.

54
00:02:33,529 --> 00:02:34,613
Congrats, phyl.

55
00:02:34,697 --> 00:02:35,740
It's so edgy.

56
00:02:35,823 --> 00:02:38,034
Phyllis: I have been wanting
to be Santa for years.

57
00:02:38,117 --> 00:02:40,119
I believe I have
the right temperament

58
00:02:40,202 --> 00:02:42,121
and the figure to
do the job well.

59
00:02:42,204 --> 00:02:46,459
I slipped a note to Jim 11 weeks
ago, and he said I could do it.

60
00:02:49,712 --> 00:02:51,714
It's been a long journey.

61
00:02:54,467 --> 00:02:56,260
But I'm Santa claus!

62
00:02:57,678 --> 00:03:00,431
So, Santa, what can we
expect from this party?

63
00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:03,601
It's going to be a very jolly
time if you've been good.

64
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:05,019
What if you've been bad?

65
00:03:05,102 --> 00:03:07,021
Then nothing but
a lump of coal for you.

66
00:03:07,104 --> 00:03:08,856
What if you've been
really, really bad?

67
00:03:08,939 --> 00:03:11,150
More evil than strictly wrong.

68
00:03:11,233 --> 00:03:13,694
Hey, creed? We
covered it. Lump of coal.

69
00:03:13,778 --> 00:03:14,862
Yeah.

70
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:16,192
For the past several weeks,

71
00:03:16,238 --> 00:03:19,075
my secret Santa has been
giving me pieces of a machine

72
00:03:19,158 --> 00:03:20,826
that I've been
attempting to assemble.

73
00:03:20,910 --> 00:03:24,914
I'm suspicious of this, because
I had the exact same idea

74
00:03:25,164 --> 00:03:27,375
for catching osama bin laden.

75
00:03:27,458 --> 00:03:30,753
I would simply send him
a different piece each day.

76
00:03:30,961 --> 00:03:33,547
He would assemble
it to find himself

77
00:03:34,173 --> 00:03:35,424
in jail!

78
00:03:37,093 --> 00:03:39,261
You know, Oscar, every
time I make this lasagne

79
00:03:39,345 --> 00:03:41,597
people ask me if
it's a family recipe,

80
00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:44,892
but really, I just get
the recipe from the box.

81
00:03:45,810 --> 00:03:47,103
That's funny.

82
00:03:47,186 --> 00:03:50,898
Is it funny? I thought it was
more interesting than funny.

83
00:03:56,862 --> 00:03:58,572
I think my water just broke.

84
00:03:58,656 --> 00:03:59,990
That's too funny.

85
00:04:00,282 --> 00:04:02,410
Oscar and the warehouse guy.

86
00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:05,788
Go, Oscar!
Go, gay warehouse guy!

87
00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:09,166
Here's Santa!

88
00:04:09,625 --> 00:04:12,962
Hey, little girl, what would
you like for Christmas?

89
00:04:13,129 --> 00:04:16,882
Ooh! You have been a very
naughty girl, I see.

90
00:04:16,966 --> 00:04:19,093
Michael, we already
have a Santa. Phyllis.

91
00:04:19,510 --> 00:04:21,512
What the hell is going on?

92
00:04:23,013 --> 00:04:25,349
Phyllis, Jim? Phyllis is Santa?

93
00:04:25,683 --> 00:04:26,725
Yeah. Phyllis.

94
00:04:26,809 --> 00:04:28,328
Yeah. I told her a long
time ago she could do it.

95
00:04:28,352 --> 00:04:29,512
Take it back. That is absurd.

96
00:04:29,562 --> 00:04:30,604
No. I'm not gonna do that.

97
00:04:30,688 --> 00:04:32,148
No, Jim, come on!

98
00:04:32,231 --> 00:04:33,458
I think she's doing a good job.

99
00:04:33,482 --> 00:04:36,253
Lately, there have been serious
rumors that our company's going bankrupt,

100
00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:38,279
so David Wallace asked me
to keep morale high.

101
00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:41,532
So I asked around about what
people wanted with Christmas,

102
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:43,826
and I told them to get creative.

103
00:04:43,909 --> 00:04:47,580
And they didn't really
get creative, exactly.

104
00:04:47,872 --> 00:04:51,125
Secret Santa, karaoke, food,

105
00:04:51,459 --> 00:04:54,503
kind of the usual thing that
we do here, which is great.

106
00:04:54,587 --> 00:04:56,297
And people usually
argue about food,

107
00:04:56,380 --> 00:04:58,549
so I told everybody
to bring their favorites.

108
00:04:58,883 --> 00:05:00,968
I made an organized
signup sheet for karaoke

109
00:05:01,051 --> 00:05:03,220
so that there was no fighting

110
00:05:03,762 --> 00:05:05,181
and no crying.

111
00:05:05,264 --> 00:05:08,726
I'm doing a good job, I think,
because this year,

112
00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:10,936
I care.

113
00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:15,149
It's weird. I know.

114
00:05:16,775 --> 00:05:19,487
Itsinsane! A woman
Santa? Where does it stop?

115
00:05:19,570 --> 00:05:23,115
No! Jim, this may be the last
Christmas that we have here.

116
00:05:23,199 --> 00:05:25,951
Doesn't it make you
a tiny bit anxious,

117
00:05:26,035 --> 00:05:28,370
me not playing Santa? Come on!

118
00:05:29,288 --> 00:05:31,308
I'm not gonna go tell Phyllis
that she can't be Santa.

119
00:05:31,332 --> 00:05:35,044
Fine. Then do it anonymously.
Ransom-note ster. You can...

120
00:05:35,878 --> 00:05:37,438
You know what?
I have a bunch of letters

121
00:05:37,505 --> 00:05:39,006
cut out of magazines in my desk.

122
00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:40,090
You can use those.

123
00:05:40,174 --> 00:05:41,759
If this were Russia, yeah, sure,

124
00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:43,344
everybody would go to one Santa,

125
00:05:43,427 --> 00:05:45,346
and there would be
a line around the block,

126
00:05:45,429 --> 00:05:46,680
and once you sat on her lap

127
00:05:46,764 --> 00:05:47,908
and she asked you
what you wanted,

128
00:05:47,932 --> 00:05:50,309
you would say,
probably, freedom,

129
00:05:50,434 --> 00:05:54,021
at which point the kgb would
arrest you and send you to Siberia.

130
00:05:54,104 --> 00:05:56,815
It's a good thing
Russia doesn't exist anymore.

131
00:05:56,982 --> 00:05:57,983
Dwight: Name?

132
00:05:58,275 --> 00:05:59,276
Kelly.

133
00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:02,196
And what would you
like for Christmas?

134
00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,865
I would like the
photographer, please, Santa.

135
00:06:04,949 --> 00:06:05,950
Ryan: We'll talk.

136
00:06:07,451 --> 00:06:10,412
So far, people really seem
to like the party this year.

137
00:06:10,496 --> 00:06:12,790
We took some chances
and it's working out.

138
00:06:13,374 --> 00:06:16,794
Ho, ho, ho! Ho, ho, ho!

139
00:06:17,253 --> 00:06:22,591
Why pay more to sit next to
old trannie claus over there

140
00:06:22,675 --> 00:06:24,552
when you can sit on my lap?

141
00:06:24,635 --> 00:06:29,223
Phyllis is only pretending to
be a man. I'm the real thing!

142
00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:32,101
Sit down on my lap
and there will be no doubt!

143
00:06:32,184 --> 00:06:33,227
Okay. Okay.

144
00:06:33,310 --> 00:06:35,854
No, it's not, like, penis-wise.

145
00:06:35,938 --> 00:06:38,148
Hello, little boy!
What's your name?

146
00:06:38,524 --> 00:06:40,734
Michael, it's me, Kevin.

147
00:06:40,818 --> 00:06:42,736
Phyllis says
I'm too big for her lap.

148
00:06:42,820 --> 00:06:48,742
Oh, I am so sorry that Phyllis
hates you and hates your body,

149
00:06:49,285 --> 00:06:51,620
but Santa remembers a reindeer

150
00:06:51,704 --> 00:06:54,915
that was just a tiny
bit different as well.

151
00:06:54,999 --> 00:06:56,584
When can I sit on your lap?

152
00:06:56,667 --> 00:06:59,336
Right now!
Come on over here, big boy!

153
00:07:00,546 --> 00:07:02,673
There we go! Oh, my god.

154
00:07:04,216 --> 00:07:06,260
That's really comfortable.

155
00:07:08,304 --> 00:07:10,347
What would you like
for Christmas, little boy?

156
00:07:13,392 --> 00:07:16,729
I don't know. I didn't know
you were gonna ask me that.

157
00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:19,189
Well, what did you think
was going to happen?

158
00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:23,235
I didn't know. Nobody's ever
let me sit on their lap before.

159
00:07:23,319 --> 00:07:25,779
All right,
just say some toys, please.

160
00:07:25,863 --> 00:07:27,573
Can you give me some choices?

161
00:07:27,823 --> 00:07:29,825
'Cause I really don't want
to mess up on this list.

162
00:07:29,908 --> 00:07:31,869
Damn it, Kevin. Come on.

163
00:07:32,536 --> 00:07:35,122
What about if I tell you
the things I don't want?

164
00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:37,374
Okay, get off! Get off! Off!

165
00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:40,753
Oh, god!

166
00:07:40,836 --> 00:07:42,755
I didn't even get to
tell you what I wanted.

167
00:07:42,838 --> 00:07:44,340
Okay, you know what you get?

168
00:07:44,423 --> 00:07:46,717
You get a thousand helium
balloons attached to you

169
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:49,053
so Santa doesn't have
to go through this again.

170
00:07:49,637 --> 00:07:50,679
Awesome.

171
00:07:50,763 --> 00:07:51,764
Foot's asleep.

172
00:07:51,847 --> 00:07:54,224
Oh, god. My whole leg.

173
00:07:55,684 --> 00:07:56,685
Oh, god.

174
00:07:58,270 --> 00:07:59,271
Oh, god.

175
00:08:06,779 --> 00:08:08,238
All right, that's better.
Who's next?

176
00:08:08,906 --> 00:08:09,948
Well?

177
00:08:10,032 --> 00:08:11,700
I'm trying, Phyllis.
You're Santa.

178
00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,786
The only Santa.
That's what I want.

179
00:08:13,869 --> 00:08:17,247
You promised me this. Don't
make me get Bob involved.

180
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:18,916
What would Bob do?

181
00:08:18,999 --> 00:08:20,918
Never mind.
I shouldn't have said that.

182
00:08:21,877 --> 00:08:23,462
Check it out.

183
00:08:24,088 --> 00:08:26,840
In fourth grade, bronwyn
reinhart stabbed me with a pencil,

184
00:08:26,924 --> 00:08:27,925
scarred me for life.

185
00:08:28,050 --> 00:08:29,051
Oh!

186
00:08:29,510 --> 00:08:30,511
Oh, yeah, I see it.

187
00:08:31,679 --> 00:08:33,305
Yeah, so I know how it feels.

188
00:08:33,389 --> 00:08:34,598
Does it hurt?

189
00:08:34,682 --> 00:08:35,808
It stings a lot.

190
00:08:36,684 --> 00:08:37,685
Hmm.

191
00:08:38,310 --> 00:08:40,854
I keep trying to figure out
who's sending me these gifts.

192
00:08:40,938 --> 00:08:42,022
I know, right?

193
00:08:42,106 --> 00:08:44,024
So far no one will admit to it.

194
00:08:44,108 --> 00:08:46,235
Isityou?

195
00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:51,573
Yeah!

196
00:08:54,284 --> 00:08:55,869
Totally. I admit it. It's me.

197
00:08:55,953 --> 00:08:57,204
Seriously?

198
00:08:57,871 --> 00:08:59,039
Seriously?

199
00:08:59,123 --> 00:09:02,000
Are you serious?
Is... what... is it you?

200
00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:04,211
When you're...
I don't... are you...

201
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:05,438
Oh, no, no, no. I'm saying...
Are you asking...

202
00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:06,622
I'm saying, are... I don't...

203
00:09:06,797 --> 00:09:08,549
It's you... no... is it...

204
00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:13,387
Yeah. Totally serious. I'm
your secret Santa. Busted!

205
00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:16,640
There he is.

206
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,058
Hey hey, man.

207
00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:19,893
Is Matt around?
I've got his check.

208
00:09:20,477 --> 00:09:23,897
Matt is on a delivery.
Just leave it here. I'll take it.

209
00:09:23,981 --> 00:09:26,233
I'll just wait for him.

210
00:09:27,317 --> 00:09:28,318
You'll wait?

211
00:09:29,153 --> 00:09:31,393
You're gonna wait to give a
guy you don't know his check?

212
00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:32,906
Spirit of Christmas.

213
00:09:32,990 --> 00:09:34,575
Right. Christmas.

214
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:37,512
Matt's a pretty good-looking
dude, don't you think?

215
00:09:37,536 --> 00:09:39,913
I'll just leave
it here with you.

216
00:09:39,997 --> 00:09:41,498
All right, thank you.

217
00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:46,336
Come here! Come here! Come here!

218
00:09:46,462 --> 00:09:49,089
I'm doing something
over here. Come on! Ah!

219
00:09:49,173 --> 00:09:50,215
Ho! Ho! Ho!

220
00:09:50,299 --> 00:09:52,176
Michael: Come on, I
need this. Come over here!

221
00:09:52,259 --> 00:09:53,302
Just sit down!

222
00:09:53,385 --> 00:09:54,553
No, no, no, no, no, no!

223
00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:55,888
Is everything okay? Yeah. Yeah.

224
00:09:55,971 --> 00:09:57,240
Ryan and I are
just having some fun.

225
00:09:57,264 --> 00:09:58,408
Can I just talk to you
for a second? Yeah.

226
00:09:58,432 --> 00:10:00,267
No, now. Okay, what?

227
00:10:00,684 --> 00:10:02,853
You can't yell out,
"I need this, I need this,"

228
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,772
as you pin down
an employee on your lap.

229
00:10:04,855 --> 00:10:06,857
Okay. You know what, Jim?

230
00:10:06,982 --> 00:10:10,110
With two santas in the room,
things get ruthless.

231
00:10:10,194 --> 00:10:11,838
Yeah. Do you understand?
You forced my hand.

232
00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:13,742
Michael, it's Phyllis.
We want Phyllis as Santa.

233
00:10:13,781 --> 00:10:16,492
Do we? Do we?
Is that what we want?

234
00:10:16,575 --> 00:10:17,951
Why don't we take a vote on it?

235
00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:19,035
Great.

236
00:10:19,077 --> 00:10:20,496
Hey! Okay, everybody.

237
00:10:20,704 --> 00:10:23,540
The office is being
pulled apart. I realize that.

238
00:10:23,624 --> 00:10:26,502
There are traditions at stake.

239
00:10:26,585 --> 00:10:28,229
And there are women...
Who wants Phyllis as Santa?

240
00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:31,298
No, no, no! Wait! No!
There are other choices.

241
00:10:31,423 --> 00:10:34,468
There's information that we...
Are you kidding me, Kevin?

242
00:10:34,551 --> 00:10:36,011
After you almost killed me?

243
00:10:36,094 --> 00:10:38,764
Michael, I had you.
I just want to try Phyllis.

244
00:10:38,847 --> 00:10:42,059
And if you want Michael
as Santa, raise your hand.

245
00:10:43,811 --> 00:10:44,895
Can I get you some punch?

246
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:48,232
I... no, I'll get some punch.
That looks delicious.

247
00:10:50,234 --> 00:10:51,485
Kelly: Michael!

248
00:10:54,238 --> 00:10:55,322
Excuse me.

249
00:10:55,405 --> 00:10:58,116
Whoever has been sending me
the parts to this gun,

250
00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:01,119
I think you sent me a gear
instead of a trigger.

251
00:11:01,203 --> 00:11:03,163
How do you know it's a gun?

252
00:11:03,247 --> 00:11:04,832
What else does it look like?

253
00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:07,751
Not a gun.

254
00:11:07,835 --> 00:11:09,419
Well, I don't have
all the pieces yet.

255
00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:14,132
Well, unless the missing piece
is a gun, you don't have a gun.

256
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:17,094
Not a gun.

257
00:11:17,928 --> 00:11:21,932
In the north pole, I spend many
nights alone tinkering with toys.

258
00:11:22,099 --> 00:11:27,396
So today, let's put a twinkle
in old kris kringle's eye.

259
00:11:28,105 --> 00:11:29,898
Let the party begin!

260
00:11:36,572 --> 00:11:39,616
I don't ask for much for
Christmas. I really don't.

261
00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:43,704
It's not like I am begging
people to buy me diamonds

262
00:11:44,913 --> 00:11:47,082
and broach pendants.

263
00:11:47,499 --> 00:11:48,584
Oh!

264
00:11:48,709 --> 00:11:52,462
"Buy me something expensive, or
I'm gonna kill myself." That's not...

265
00:11:52,546 --> 00:11:55,799
I don't care about that!
All I want to be is Santa.

266
00:11:56,133 --> 00:11:59,761
And you want to take that
away from me, fine.

267
00:12:00,429 --> 00:12:01,680
Go ahead.

268
00:12:02,180 --> 00:12:03,599
But when you need my help

269
00:12:03,682 --> 00:12:05,058
because I am ruining everything,

270
00:12:05,142 --> 00:12:06,268
don't look at me!

271
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:11,607
Behold,

272
00:12:12,816 --> 00:12:14,318
Jesus Christ.

273
00:12:14,484 --> 00:12:18,697
And I bring to you
glad Christmas tidings.

274
00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:22,326
I want to remind everyone
the true meaning of Christmas.

275
00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:26,121
Those of you who wish
to join me, that's great.

276
00:12:26,204 --> 00:12:27,497
I am excited by that,

277
00:12:27,789 --> 00:12:29,416
and those of you who don't,

278
00:12:29,499 --> 00:12:31,960
I forgive you,
but I never forget.

279
00:12:32,044 --> 00:12:35,464
Wow, Michael. This must
be obvious how wrong this is.

280
00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:37,132
The antichrist.

281
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:38,467
Okay, you can't...

282
00:12:39,009 --> 00:12:40,594
Look, you cannot push religion.

283
00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:42,554
But I can push drugs in here.

284
00:12:42,638 --> 00:12:43,764
Is that what you're saying?

285
00:12:43,847 --> 00:12:46,391
Well, you have to pick one
or the other. Your choice.

286
00:12:46,475 --> 00:12:49,144
Pick your poison. Get
back to me. In the meantime,

287
00:12:49,227 --> 00:12:52,731
I am going to spread my
goodness all over this company!

288
00:12:53,899 --> 00:12:56,151
Hello, workers.

289
00:12:56,610 --> 00:12:58,862
Salt of the earth.

290
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:02,866
Listen to what
I am saying unto you.

291
00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:06,036
I am Jesus.

292
00:13:07,162 --> 00:13:10,290
Okay, I need everybody
to stop what you're doing

293
00:13:10,374 --> 00:13:11,875
and watch this.

294
00:13:12,501 --> 00:13:15,170
Thank you, Darryl.
Thank you, my son.

295
00:13:16,046 --> 00:13:19,007
Everyone, I have heard
your cries for rest,

296
00:13:19,508 --> 00:13:22,928
and I am inviting you
up to our Christmas party,

297
00:13:23,053 --> 00:13:25,639
where you can eat
and drink and have fun.

298
00:13:25,764 --> 00:13:30,018
Hell, yeah. Let's go,
y'all. Thanks, Mike.

299
00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:42,030
Everyone, everyone, please welcome
our friends from the warehouse.

300
00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:45,909
I command thee to mingle
and make merriment.

301
00:13:46,076 --> 00:13:49,538
Libations and food,
please, enjoy.

302
00:13:50,038 --> 00:13:51,039
Enjoy.

303
00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:53,622
That was very nice of you.

304
00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:56,628
Yes, actually nicer than
Santa. Jesus doesn't judge.

305
00:13:56,837 --> 00:13:58,597
The only problem is
we only have food for us.

306
00:13:59,089 --> 00:14:00,924
So would've loved
a heads up on this.

307
00:14:01,008 --> 00:14:04,052
Well, would've loved to have
been the central gift-giving figure,

308
00:14:04,136 --> 00:14:07,139
but I guess neither of us is
getting what we want, right?

309
00:14:08,598 --> 00:14:11,601
Look, I can barely pretend
to like the people up here.

310
00:14:11,935 --> 00:14:13,770
What am I supposed
to say to Artie?

311
00:14:16,273 --> 00:14:17,566
Hey, phyms?

312
00:14:17,649 --> 00:14:21,028
Could you not reveal to Erin
that I'm her secret Santa?

313
00:14:21,111 --> 00:14:23,006
All right, sweetie, I'll
just tell her it's Michael.

314
00:14:23,030 --> 00:14:24,114
Okay.

315
00:14:24,948 --> 00:14:27,617
Santa, if you were a woman,
I'd kiss you.

316
00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,708
Are either of you guys
friends with,

317
00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:37,210
or ever hang out with
any cleaning ladies?

318
00:14:38,253 --> 00:14:41,214
Um, I have to find a new one,
'cause mine died.

319
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:43,216
First training session is free.

320
00:14:43,300 --> 00:14:46,344
I'll show you the ropes, and get
you on track with the nutrition side.

321
00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,889
My goal is to look like you,

322
00:14:48,972 --> 00:14:51,308
like a big, white, you.

323
00:14:51,683 --> 00:14:55,812
How do I feel about the warehouse
guys showing up at our Christmas party?

324
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,398
Well, I could tell you,

325
00:14:58,899 --> 00:15:00,942
or I could show you.

326
00:15:02,152 --> 00:15:03,445
This is how I feel.

327
00:15:10,118 --> 00:15:13,121
Both: I saw
three ships come sailing in

328
00:15:13,330 --> 00:15:14,450
Pam: Have you talked to him?

329
00:15:14,498 --> 00:15:15,582
What?

330
00:15:16,374 --> 00:15:17,459
Matt.

331
00:15:17,542 --> 00:15:18,794
Oscar: Is it that obvious?

332
00:15:20,962 --> 00:15:22,214
No. Hey.

333
00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:24,966
Hmm.

334
00:15:25,050 --> 00:15:29,262
Good pate, right? Oscar
made it. Have you met Oscar?

335
00:15:30,013 --> 00:15:31,013
I don't think so.

336
00:15:31,056 --> 00:15:32,808
Hey, Oscar, come here.

337
00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:41,274
Oscar, this is Matt,
and Matt loves your pate.

338
00:15:42,192 --> 00:15:43,443
I had some.

339
00:15:43,527 --> 00:15:44,694
Oscar's paté's great.

340
00:15:46,071 --> 00:15:49,366
I could eat it all day,
every day. Mmm.

341
00:15:51,743 --> 00:15:53,829
How come the good ones
are never straight, right?

342
00:15:56,665 --> 00:15:58,083
Oscar likes biking,

343
00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:03,964
and classical movies,
French films mostly, right?

344
00:16:04,047 --> 00:16:05,048
Mnun_. Yeah?

345
00:16:06,174 --> 00:16:08,718
Okay. That's all I'm
gonna say. Classical music.

346
00:16:09,511 --> 00:16:12,556
And new music. Radiohead.

347
00:16:14,057 --> 00:16:15,600
I like radiohead.

348
00:16:16,893 --> 00:16:18,979
We should all go
to a concert together.

349
00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:20,248
Are we still doing that thing

350
00:16:20,272 --> 00:16:22,649
where we take new people
to the office to a concert?

351
00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:24,401
Okay, Pam. Okay.

352
00:16:25,193 --> 00:16:26,236
Look. Pigs in a blanket.

353
00:16:29,531 --> 00:16:31,491
So, Victor, is it?

354
00:16:34,786 --> 00:16:36,371
Yeah. Victor.

355
00:16:36,454 --> 00:16:37,747
Nice meeting you.

356
00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:38,832
Nice to meet you.

357
00:16:39,082 --> 00:16:43,420
Yes. They're the only two gay guys
I know. But they should be together.

358
00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:47,299
So, guys, this is
more like finger food.

359
00:16:47,382 --> 00:16:49,759
Uh-oh! A lasagne.
Look out, Garfield.

360
00:16:50,677 --> 00:16:52,095
Uh-oh! What does that mean?

361
00:16:52,179 --> 00:16:53,346
Oh, they call me Garfield.

362
00:16:53,430 --> 00:16:56,516
I've never seen a lasagne
and not eaten the whole pan.

363
00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:57,642
I wish you wouldn't.

364
00:16:57,726 --> 00:16:59,811
Oh, well, I can't help myself.

365
00:16:59,895 --> 00:17:01,521
Can you imagine
what it's like for me,

366
00:17:01,605 --> 00:17:03,440
that it has that power over me?

367
00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:04,524
I gotta have some.

368
00:17:05,066 --> 00:17:07,277
Sorry, guys. Everybody get some?

369
00:17:07,694 --> 00:17:09,029
Okay. I got mine.

370
00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:12,741
All right, I just got out of
the restroom, and it stinks.

371
00:17:12,908 --> 00:17:14,201
The warehouse needs to go.

372
00:17:14,284 --> 00:17:16,137
Okay, wait. How do you know
it's someone from the warehouse

373
00:17:16,161 --> 00:17:17,704
who stunk up the bathroom?

374
00:17:17,787 --> 00:17:19,915
They stink up the bathroom
with their smelly poos,

375
00:17:19,998 --> 00:17:21,791
because they don't eat
as quality food as us

376
00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:23,543
'cause they're poor.
It's science.

377
00:17:23,627 --> 00:17:25,337
That is so offensive

378
00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:26,963
and thought out.

379
00:17:27,464 --> 00:17:30,133
Maybe if we just took some
time to try to get to know them,

380
00:17:30,217 --> 00:17:32,928
rather than constantly
complaining... Garfield! Garfield!

381
00:17:33,011 --> 00:17:35,764
All: Garfield!
Garfield! Garfield!

382
00:17:35,847 --> 00:17:36,890
Do it, girl.

383
00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:39,684
That woman is a
beast. Garfield! Garfield!

384
00:17:39,768 --> 00:17:42,020
Garfield! Garfield...

385
00:17:42,103 --> 00:17:44,773
All: Yeah!

386
00:17:45,815 --> 00:17:50,695
I am so very glad that you joined
us here on this festive occasion.

387
00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:52,113
You look like Gandalf.

388
00:17:52,197 --> 00:17:55,200
No, I'm Jesus, and we're
celebrating my birthday.

389
00:17:55,283 --> 00:17:56,802
Seriously, though, Mike,
you should take that off, man.

390
00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:58,870
It's offensive, even to me.

391
00:18:06,336 --> 00:18:07,504
Merry Christmas, creed.

392
00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:09,631
Thanks, Santa. I love it.

393
00:18:09,923 --> 00:18:12,300
And he doesn't
even know what it is.

394
00:18:12,384 --> 00:18:14,844
And it's probably terrible,
so save the receipt.

395
00:18:14,928 --> 00:18:16,304
Get the receipt, creed.

396
00:18:16,388 --> 00:18:19,891
This just arrived from the
dunder Mifflin north pole branch.

397
00:18:19,975 --> 00:18:22,769
We don't have a
north pole branch. Idiot!

398
00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:27,649
Uh-oh! What's Dwight
gonna get? What is it?

399
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,109
Yes!

400
00:18:29,192 --> 00:18:31,152
Oh, yes! It's space garbage.

401
00:18:31,236 --> 00:18:33,905
Dwight's gonna be able
to build himself a friend.

402
00:18:33,989 --> 00:18:36,157
Deck the halls with crappy gifts

403
00:18:36,241 --> 00:18:40,453
and Stanley, ho, ho, ho,
you've been very good this year.

404
00:18:40,537 --> 00:18:41,579
I have.

405
00:18:41,663 --> 00:18:43,623
Yeah, except for
cheating on your wife.

406
00:18:43,707 --> 00:18:46,459
Adultery's a sin. Look it
up in the Bible, people.

407
00:18:46,543 --> 00:18:47,544
What'd he get?

408
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,546
He got scented candles.

409
00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:52,674
Well, that's appropriate. A
lot of fire where you're going.

410
00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:54,175
Better get used to it.

411
00:18:54,259 --> 00:18:56,928
You're going to h-e-I-I,
double hockey sticks.

412
00:18:57,012 --> 00:18:58,179
Going to hell, Stanley.

413
00:18:58,263 --> 00:18:59,543
Angela: Amen.

414
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:02,434
And this brings us
to you, little one.

415
00:19:02,684 --> 00:19:05,478
I can't see from here, people.
Somebody shout it out.

416
00:19:05,562 --> 00:19:07,397
Don't make me get up.

417
00:19:08,064 --> 00:19:11,151
It's fabric.
I really wanted this.

418
00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:14,946
That's fantastic! You can make
another dress that goes past your feet.

419
00:19:15,030 --> 00:19:16,156
Andy, was this you?

420
00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:17,282
It's a secret.

421
00:19:17,365 --> 00:19:19,868
No, Andy had Erin.
Phyllis: It was a secret.

422
00:19:19,951 --> 00:19:21,202
Pam: Michael! Phyllis: You...

423
00:19:21,286 --> 00:19:23,872
What? Was I not supposed to say?

424
00:19:24,164 --> 00:19:25,165
What? Turn it back on.

425
00:19:35,342 --> 00:19:36,569
David: Yes, Michael.
What is so urgent?

426
00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:39,012
David, guess who I am
sitting here dressed as.

427
00:19:39,095 --> 00:19:41,765
I'm not going to guess. You
can tell me, or! Will hang up.

428
00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:44,768
I will give you a hint.
His last name is Christ.

429
00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:48,521
He has the power of flight.
He can heal leopards.

430
00:19:48,605 --> 00:19:49,606
Michael...

431
00:19:49,689 --> 00:19:51,399
I am Jesus, David,
and you know why?

432
00:19:51,483 --> 00:19:55,862
Because Phyllis, a woman,
has uslurped my role as Santa.

433
00:19:55,945 --> 00:19:56,946
Michael... what?

434
00:19:57,030 --> 00:19:59,282
This is a very, very bad time.

435
00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:01,951
Really? What's going on?

436
00:20:03,453 --> 00:20:05,038
Stephanie,
can you hop off, please?

437
00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:06,373
Stephanie: Sure, David.

438
00:20:06,456 --> 00:20:09,918
What the hell? How rude!
Does she do that all the time?

439
00:20:10,168 --> 00:20:11,812
Erin: Do you want me off
this call too, Michael?

440
00:20:11,836 --> 00:20:15,173
Hey, what? Get off!
Get off the phone!

441
00:20:17,801 --> 00:20:20,970
David: Listen, I shouldn't tell you
this, but the company has a buyer.

442
00:20:21,054 --> 00:20:23,556
The board will have no
choice but to approve,

443
00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,892
and they are going
to clean house.

444
00:20:25,975 --> 00:20:27,185
What does that mean?

445
00:20:27,477 --> 00:20:28,937
I'll be fired.

446
00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:31,564
We”, can't Alan protect you?

447
00:20:31,648 --> 00:20:33,149
Alan will be out, too.
All of us.

448
00:20:35,819 --> 00:20:36,903
All of us?

449
00:20:38,446 --> 00:20:40,490
Oh, my god. Oh, my god.

450
00:20:41,991 --> 00:20:43,743
I'm sorry you can't be Santa.

451
00:20:43,827 --> 00:20:46,454
I do have to go.
Goodbye, Michael.

452
00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:51,084
Michael: Earlier today,
this office needed a Santa.

453
00:20:51,167 --> 00:20:56,297
And then it needed a second
Santa. And then it needed a Jesus.

454
00:20:57,966 --> 00:20:59,175
And now,

455
00:21:00,677 --> 00:21:02,429
it needs a Michael.

456
00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:06,683
And that's one suit
Phyllis cannot fit into.

457
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:11,062
Hey, how's everybody doing?

458
00:21:11,771 --> 00:21:14,315
Not great. You heckled
Santa for an hour and a half.

459
00:21:14,399 --> 00:21:16,484
That was a different guy.
That was Jesus.

460
00:21:16,568 --> 00:21:18,862
Jesus sort of ruined the party.

461
00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:20,572
Hurt, petulant Jesus.

462
00:21:20,655 --> 00:21:22,991
Are you serious?
That is so offensive.

463
00:21:24,325 --> 00:21:26,202
You know what's
even more offensive,

464
00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:31,332
is bailing on this party because
some jerk ruined the first part of it.

465
00:21:32,667 --> 00:21:34,335
Dwight, come here.

466
00:21:34,919 --> 00:21:37,589
Here's my debit card. I want
you to go pick up a bunch of pizzas

467
00:21:37,672 --> 00:21:38,816
and meet me in
the conference room.

468
00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:39,883
What's your pin number?

469
00:21:39,966 --> 00:21:41,843
I don't want to say.

470
00:21:42,135 --> 00:21:44,387
But it's fun to stay at the...

471
00:21:46,639 --> 00:21:48,433
It's fun to stay at the...

472
00:21:48,516 --> 00:21:51,394
Where? Holiday inn. I don't...

473
00:21:57,275 --> 00:22:00,028
I thought that
you would like it.

474
00:22:00,111 --> 00:22:01,571
It was a little much, Andy.

475
00:22:02,238 --> 00:22:04,699
Well, it's the thought
that counts.

476
00:22:04,782 --> 00:22:06,451
What were you thinking?

477
00:22:08,495 --> 00:22:12,540
I suppose a gentleman might
throw in the towel at this point.

478
00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:16,628
Guess what. Not gonna happen.

479
00:22:16,961 --> 00:22:20,965
You know what? Christmas
isn't about Santa or Jesus.

480
00:22:21,257 --> 00:22:22,509
It's about the workplace.

481
00:22:22,634 --> 00:22:24,528
The exact opposite of
what you just said is true.

482
00:22:24,552 --> 00:22:27,889
See, that's exactly
something that Jim would say,

483
00:22:27,972 --> 00:22:29,182
and I love him for it.

484
00:22:29,265 --> 00:22:31,935
All of you feel like my family.

485
00:22:32,310 --> 00:22:37,774
Ryan, you are my son, and
Pam, you're my wife, and Jim...

486
00:22:39,025 --> 00:22:42,946
And Angela and Phyllis,
you are my grandmas.

487
00:22:43,112 --> 00:22:48,159
And Oscar, you just
moved in next door

488
00:22:49,369 --> 00:22:50,912
because of urban renewal.

489
00:22:52,288 --> 00:22:55,458
And Stanley, you're our mailman.

490
00:22:56,292 --> 00:22:59,254
And I can't help but look at all
of your wonderful, beautiful faces

491
00:22:59,337 --> 00:23:01,089
and think, "how could
they do this to us?"

492
00:23:01,172 --> 00:23:02,173
What?

493
00:23:02,257 --> 00:23:03,377
How could we do what to you?

494
00:23:03,466 --> 00:23:05,611
That's not... never... nothing.
Meredith: Why would we...

495
00:23:05,635 --> 00:23:06,803
We deserve to know.

496
00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:08,072
Michael: I didn't say anything!

497
00:23:08,096 --> 00:23:09,347
We're going out of business!

498
00:23:09,430 --> 00:23:10,431
What? What?

499
00:23:10,515 --> 00:23:11,516
Andy: You are kidding me.

500
00:23:11,599 --> 00:23:12,701
Wait, wait, wait. Who said that?

501
00:23:12,725 --> 00:23:14,519
David told me on the phone.
David told me.

502
00:23:14,602 --> 00:23:15,788
Andy: When?
When did he tell you, today?

503
00:23:15,812 --> 00:23:19,649
Earlier today,
he said we have been sold.

504
00:23:19,732 --> 00:23:20,775
Jim: What?

505
00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:24,279
Jim: Dwight! Jesus.
Pam: Come on!

506
00:23:24,612 --> 00:23:27,323
Michael, wait.
So they said we are sold.

507
00:23:27,407 --> 00:23:29,284
David is gone, Alan
is gone. We're all gone.

508
00:23:29,367 --> 00:23:30,827
Okay, but we haven't gone under.

509
00:23:30,910 --> 00:23:32,972
We've been sold, and that
can mean many different things.

510
00:23:32,996 --> 00:23:35,248
It's hard for me to
imagine a scenario

511
00:23:35,331 --> 00:23:37,917
where Meredith Palmer keeps
herjob and David Wallace does not.

512
00:23:38,001 --> 00:23:39,669
No offense, Meredith.
No, I get it.

513
00:23:39,752 --> 00:23:41,021
Did he say anything
about the warehouse?

514
00:23:41,045 --> 00:23:43,214
No, but he's always held
you guys in high regard.

515
00:23:43,339 --> 00:23:45,800
You two are the worst bosses!

516
00:23:45,883 --> 00:23:47,969
You are. You never
know anything.

517
00:23:48,052 --> 00:23:50,072
It's like the blind leading the
blind. "Guess, guess, guess."

518
00:23:50,096 --> 00:23:52,098
Relax.
Okay, I can still fire you.

519
00:23:52,181 --> 00:23:55,077
We better get some answers soon, or
it's gonna get real litigious up in here.

520
00:23:55,101 --> 00:23:57,770
Like, you're gonna sue?
Who're you gonna sue? For what?

521
00:23:57,854 --> 00:23:59,814
You have no idea. The
law protects the plaintiffs.

522
00:23:59,897 --> 00:24:01,083
I'll call him. I'll call David.

523
00:24:01,107 --> 00:24:03,151
No you won't, because
he's not picking up his phone.

524
00:24:03,234 --> 00:24:07,071
Yes, I will, because I always
know how to get through to him.

525
00:24:07,739 --> 00:24:10,283
He told me where
his kids go to school.

526
00:24:10,366 --> 00:24:12,910
I call the school. I tell
them I'm the pediatrician.

527
00:24:12,994 --> 00:24:16,748
They patch me through to his
secretary. I use my little girl voice.

528
00:24:16,831 --> 00:24:17,999
Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom.

529
00:24:18,625 --> 00:24:19,852
David: Hey, sweetie, what is it?

530
00:24:19,876 --> 00:24:22,295
It's not sweetie.
It's Michael Scott.

531
00:24:22,420 --> 00:24:24,440
What the hell? Stephanie,
could you hop off, please?

532
00:24:24,464 --> 00:24:26,299
Michael, I have never...

533
00:24:26,382 --> 00:24:27,422
David... never, ever...

534
00:24:27,467 --> 00:24:28,718
David, you are on speakerphone

535
00:24:28,801 --> 00:24:31,512
with the entire branch
and the warehouse.

536
00:24:31,596 --> 00:24:33,514
Hi, David. All: Hey, David.

537
00:24:33,890 --> 00:24:34,974
Hi, everyone.

538
00:24:35,058 --> 00:24:37,226
David, they do not believe me

539
00:24:37,727 --> 00:24:40,563
when you told me
that everyone was canned.

540
00:24:40,897 --> 00:24:42,541
You weren't supposed
to tell anyone, Michael.

541
00:24:42,565 --> 00:24:44,025
Well, I think
we're past that now.

542
00:24:44,108 --> 00:24:45,652
I am not supposed...

543
00:24:45,735 --> 00:24:47,820
Okay, fine. Guys, I was really

544
00:24:47,904 --> 00:24:49,697
only talking about Alan, myself,

545
00:24:49,781 --> 00:24:51,532
and a few other
execs you don't know.

546
00:24:51,616 --> 00:24:53,993
Oh, my god.
David, that's horrible.

547
00:24:54,077 --> 00:24:58,706
How about us? It's Meredith. By the
way, your wife is a very lucky woman.

548
00:24:58,998 --> 00:25:02,168
Look, they're buying the
company for the distribution.

549
00:25:02,251 --> 00:25:05,088
You guys are the only thing
about this company that works.

550
00:25:05,171 --> 00:25:06,297
So congratulations.

551
00:25:06,381 --> 00:25:07,382
We're not fired?

552
00:25:07,465 --> 00:25:08,883
No. Congratulations.

553
00:25:08,966 --> 00:25:10,635
All right! Yeah!

554
00:25:11,969 --> 00:25:13,262
Come on!

555
00:25:13,346 --> 00:25:14,597
It's a Christmas miracle!

556
00:25:14,847 --> 00:25:15,932
Yeah!

557
00:25:19,769 --> 00:25:21,771
Walk a lonely road

558
00:25:21,854 --> 00:25:25,024
only one that I have ever known

559
00:25:25,525 --> 00:25:27,652
don't know where it goes

560
00:25:27,735 --> 00:25:30,822
but it's all to me
and I walk alone

561
00:25:32,031 --> 00:25:33,533
Dwight: It's true. Yes.

562
00:25:33,616 --> 00:25:35,618
Dwight: We all walk alone. Jim.

563
00:25:37,078 --> 00:25:39,122
Jim. Dwight: Come on. Shall we?

564
00:25:40,707 --> 00:25:41,791
Jim.

565
00:25:42,834 --> 00:25:47,797
My shadow's the only one
that walks beside me

566
00:25:52,635 --> 00:25:53,636
Take it away, Andy.

567
00:26:12,780 --> 00:26:13,823
Wow.

568
00:26:16,826 --> 00:26:19,203
Yeah. Thatwastheidea thank you.

569
00:26:19,287 --> 00:26:21,164
Awesome. Thanks, man.

570
00:26:23,499 --> 00:26:28,463
Christmas tree
thou leaves are so unchanging

571
00:26:28,546 --> 00:26:29,964
of course!

572
00:26:31,799 --> 00:26:33,176
You got it?

573
00:26:34,010 --> 00:26:35,094
What is that?

574
00:26:35,178 --> 00:26:36,220
I have no idea.

575
00:26:38,181 --> 00:26:40,892
Well, maybe those will help.

576
00:26:40,975 --> 00:26:42,685
Michael, please. Come on.

577
00:26:44,145 --> 00:26:45,271
Sure. Sorry.

578
00:26:45,354 --> 00:26:46,354
Nice to meet you, Oscar.

579
00:26:46,397 --> 00:26:47,398
Nice to meet you, Mark.

580
00:26:47,482 --> 00:26:49,442
It's Matt. Right, Matt.

581
00:26:51,652 --> 00:26:53,154
I know what I'm doing, Pam.

582
00:27:00,203 --> 00:27:01,913
Oh, man!

583
00:27:03,164 --> 00:27:04,749
I can use this for so many nuts.

584
00:27:04,832 --> 00:27:07,668
Macadamias, Brazil nuts, pecans,

585
00:27:07,752 --> 00:27:11,005
almonds, clams, snails.

586
00:27:13,883 --> 00:27:15,051
Not in front of the kid.

587
00:27:15,843 --> 00:27:17,220
This is a great party.

588
00:27:18,346 --> 00:27:21,265
Did you buy the company just
to save your Christmas party?

589
00:27:21,349 --> 00:27:24,060
I promise I will never buy a
company without telling you first.

590
00:27:28,981 --> 00:27:30,274
Hi, Santa.

591
00:27:30,358 --> 00:27:31,567
Hi, Michael.

592
00:27:35,279 --> 00:27:36,405
Okay.

593
00:27:38,366 --> 00:27:39,617
I'd like to make a wish.

594
00:27:40,243 --> 00:27:41,285
What?

595
00:27:41,911 --> 00:27:47,250
I would like an Xbox and a TV
that's compatible with an Xbox.

596
00:27:50,086 --> 00:27:51,587
And I'm sorry.

597
00:27:54,590 --> 00:27:58,761
An Xbox it is, because I've
decided you're a good boy.

598
00:27:59,762 --> 00:28:02,473
Scott, what in the hell
is going on here?

599
00:28:02,598 --> 00:28:04,451
No, no, no. We worked it
out. You called Bob? Phyllis!

600
00:28:04,475 --> 00:28:06,894
I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.
It was earlier today.

601
00:28:06,978 --> 00:28:08,104
Okay.

602
00:28:08,604 --> 00:28:09,748
Hi, sweetheart. You okay, baby?

603
00:28:09,772 --> 00:28:10,857
I'm good, baby.

604
00:28:10,940 --> 00:28:13,234
Oh, god. Get a room, santas.

605
00:28:13,526 --> 00:28:14,527
Fresh nut?

606
00:28:14,652 --> 00:28:16,445
I don't mind if I do. Thank you.

607
00:28:20,575 --> 00:28:22,493
Dwight: Thank you, Santa.

608
00:28:22,577 --> 00:28:23,911
Okay, happy holidays.

609
00:28:24,996 --> 00:28:27,248
It's real slippery out here.

610
00:28:30,543 --> 00:28:32,336
Oh, my god.

611
00:28:32,420 --> 00:28:33,838
Twelve drummers drumming.

612
00:28:47,226 --> 00:28:50,062
Merry Christmas, Erin.
Take it away, boys!