1 00:00:01,085 --> 00:00:03,796 What about this one? It's kind of badass, right? 2 00:00:05,840 --> 00:00:08,426 It just seems kind of crazy in a way I might need right now. 3 00:00:08,593 --> 00:00:13,264 I don't know. Oh, that's not yours. 4 00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,933 Jim: Stanleyjust drank oj out of my mug 5 00:00:16,017 --> 00:00:19,604 and didn't seem to realize that it wasn't his hot coffee. 6 00:00:19,687 --> 00:00:21,981 So, the question has to be asked, 7 00:00:22,064 --> 00:00:25,234 is there no limit to what he won't notice? 8 00:00:25,776 --> 00:00:27,945 What's a seven-letter word for purse? 9 00:00:29,071 --> 00:00:30,281 Satchel. 10 00:00:30,448 --> 00:00:32,200 No. Starts with an "h." 11 00:00:32,283 --> 00:00:33,534 Handbag! 12 00:00:35,119 --> 00:00:36,120 Hmm, thank you. 13 00:00:38,623 --> 00:00:39,624 Shh. 14 00:00:50,635 --> 00:00:52,345 All right, everybody. Take a seat. 15 00:00:52,637 --> 00:00:55,681 As you may have heard, our branch on the planet Jupiter 16 00:00:55,806 --> 00:00:58,142 is up 8,000% in sales. 17 00:01:02,980 --> 00:01:06,359 Hold up. That clock is slow. It is 5:00. 18 00:01:07,109 --> 00:01:08,694 I will see you all tomorrow. 19 00:01:08,778 --> 00:01:10,154 Bye, Stanley, love you. 20 00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:15,243 So long, Stanley. 21 00:01:15,326 --> 00:01:16,744 Night, everybody. 22 00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,563 So, what kind of statement are you making 23 00:01:44,647 --> 00:01:45,940 with that costume, Kevin? 24 00:01:46,023 --> 00:01:48,442 Well, the statement that I am making, Oscar, 25 00:01:48,526 --> 00:01:50,861 is I kind of look like Michael Moore. 26 00:01:52,738 --> 00:01:54,073 Dunder Mifflin, this is Erin. 27 00:01:54,198 --> 00:01:56,826 Happy Halloween. How can I haunt you today? 28 00:01:56,993 --> 00:01:59,353 A lot of people are really getting into Halloween this year. 29 00:01:59,412 --> 00:02:00,931 Six seconds, macgruber. 30 00:02:00,955 --> 00:02:02,832 Pam's got a lot of fun stuff planned... 31 00:02:03,666 --> 00:02:04,977 Two seconds, macgruber. 32 00:02:05,001 --> 00:02:08,170 Including a costume contest and bobbing for apples 33 00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:09,630 and a ouija board. 34 00:02:09,714 --> 00:02:12,049 Oh! Boom! Oh! Explosion! 35 00:02:12,216 --> 00:02:13,759 Macgruber! 36 00:02:14,552 --> 00:02:17,179 People are really into the costume contest this year. 37 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:20,360 Might have something to do with the prize. Maybe you've heard of it? 38 00:02:20,391 --> 00:02:23,185 The 2011 Scranton-wilkes-barre coupon book, 39 00:02:23,269 --> 00:02:26,689 worth over $15,000 in savings. 40 00:02:28,733 --> 00:02:30,234 Stop. Too late. 41 00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:33,863 If I was the real Scranton strangler, you'd be so strangled by now. 42 00:02:34,030 --> 00:02:36,741 And if you're out there, strangler, you will getcaught 43 00:02:36,824 --> 00:02:38,367 by me. 44 00:02:38,576 --> 00:02:40,304 Sounds like someone's really trying to convince us 45 00:02:40,328 --> 00:02:41,829 that he's not the Scranton strangler. 46 00:02:41,912 --> 00:02:43,706 To my chickens, I'm the Scranton strangler. 47 00:02:45,291 --> 00:02:47,251 Dwight: Oh-ho. That's very funny. 48 00:02:48,002 --> 00:02:50,522 Looks like someone decided to dress up as old Dwight schrute's mom. 49 00:02:50,546 --> 00:02:52,298 What? You're only one-third as beautiful 50 00:02:52,381 --> 00:02:53,632 and about half her height. 51 00:02:54,133 --> 00:02:56,510 I am supposed to be olive oyl. And it makes more sense 52 00:02:56,594 --> 00:02:58,679 when I'm standing next to popeye, 53 00:02:58,763 --> 00:03:01,265 but Jim doesn't wanna put his costume on. 54 00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:02,725 I am popeye. 55 00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:05,478 I've never really been a costume guy. 56 00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:08,406 Even when I was a kid, it just felt like something I was too old for. 57 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:13,861 And then this morning, Pam hands me this little number. 58 00:03:15,946 --> 00:03:20,618 In case you can't read my, my, my poker face, 59 00:03:20,743 --> 00:03:22,661 We will be reviewing our sales policies. 60 00:03:23,996 --> 00:03:27,291 I have 10 seconds to explain them or this whole place blows up. 61 00:03:27,375 --> 00:03:28,876 Macgruber! 62 00:03:29,794 --> 00:03:30,878 Lame. 63 00:03:31,462 --> 00:03:33,130 Why don't witches wear panties? 64 00:03:33,297 --> 00:03:34,340 Oh, here we go. 65 00:03:34,632 --> 00:03:36,384 Because they need to grip the broom. 66 00:03:38,969 --> 00:03:42,473 Oh! Who likes to water-ski on lake eerie? No, wait. 67 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:43,950 Where does Dracula like to water-ski? 68 00:03:43,974 --> 00:03:45,101 Lake eerie. 69 00:03:45,184 --> 00:03:47,144 When our warehouse workers make deliveries, 70 00:03:47,228 --> 00:03:50,272 they're gonna be encouraged to offer clients extra products. 71 00:03:50,481 --> 00:03:52,334 And then they will split those commissions with sales. 72 00:03:52,358 --> 00:03:54,902 Wait, so drivers are gonna be able to sell paper on the road? 73 00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:55,986 That is correct. 74 00:03:56,153 --> 00:03:58,155 Has anyone started calling you Gabe-wad yet? 75 00:03:58,489 --> 00:03:59,490 Not here, no. 76 00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:00,658 Gabe-wad. 77 00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:03,160 Gabe: Okay, guys. Fun is fun, but... 78 00:04:05,704 --> 00:04:06,705 Blackula. 79 00:04:06,789 --> 00:04:07,873 Dracula. 80 00:04:07,957 --> 00:04:10,668 Oh, so, and I almost forgot, 81 00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:12,253 you'll find this hilarious. 82 00:04:12,670 --> 00:04:16,507 Apparently corporate is going to have drivers 83 00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:19,093 sell paper on their routes now. 84 00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:22,054 That's, hke, exacfly sort of the idea that you had. 85 00:04:22,346 --> 00:04:26,016 Yes, I do remember saying something like that to you. 86 00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:27,685 Yeah. 87 00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:29,770 I'm sorry. 88 00:04:30,479 --> 00:04:31,480 I blew this. 89 00:04:31,689 --> 00:04:33,250 You should have gotten credit for that, man. 90 00:04:33,274 --> 00:04:34,626 I'm just glad we're gonna try it out. 91 00:04:34,650 --> 00:04:35,776 Really? We're good? 92 00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:36,944 We're cool. 93 00:04:37,027 --> 00:04:38,362 Okay. 94 00:04:38,529 --> 00:04:40,156 Okay. What's that in your shirt? 95 00:04:41,824 --> 00:04:45,411 That's a ream of paper. I thought you might hit me. 96 00:04:45,494 --> 00:04:49,748 Darryl philbin is the greatest guy in the world. 97 00:04:50,207 --> 00:04:51,292 And you know what I'd like? 98 00:04:51,375 --> 00:04:55,671 I would like to have all the racists brought together, 99 00:04:55,754 --> 00:04:58,466 and take Darryl philbin out to lunch, 100 00:04:58,549 --> 00:05:00,217 just to see what they're missing. 101 00:05:00,718 --> 00:05:01,736 It's a great stick, right? 102 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:02,803 Ryan: It's really good. 103 00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:05,450 A classic. I feel like you might win the whole thing with that. 104 00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:07,558 Thanks. Oscar: Everyone realizes 105 00:05:07,641 --> 00:05:10,811 this coupon book is not actually worth $15,000, right? 106 00:05:10,895 --> 00:05:13,647 You'd have to spend $200,000 on crap you don't even need 107 00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:15,649 to get $15,000 worth of benefits. 108 00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:18,128 I'm not the only one who sees this, right? Ryan: No. 109 00:05:18,152 --> 00:05:19,153 Well, sure. No. 110 00:05:20,279 --> 00:05:21,280 I get that. I get that. 111 00:05:21,530 --> 00:05:22,948 Uh, excuse me, everyone? 112 00:05:23,032 --> 00:05:26,327 I wanna invite you all to the Halloween party I'm having at my bar. 113 00:05:26,619 --> 00:05:27,870 You own a bar? 114 00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:29,997 Public school, at exit 11. 115 00:05:30,539 --> 00:05:34,293 That's a great name. You're hilarious. 116 00:05:35,294 --> 00:05:36,295 A plus! 117 00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:38,756 So, you're all on the list. 118 00:05:38,881 --> 00:05:41,884 Hey, man, can I get a plus five? It's all guys. 119 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:44,637 Hey, what's the crowd like, Danny? Our age? 120 00:05:44,762 --> 00:05:45,763 Okay. 121 00:05:46,555 --> 00:05:49,808 I don't think that she would leave Jim for Danny. 122 00:05:49,934 --> 00:05:51,936 I don't know. They're both handsome. 123 00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:56,148 Pam is gonna choose whoever has a scent most like that of her father. 124 00:05:56,232 --> 00:05:57,918 Does anyone remember what her dad smelled like? 125 00:05:57,942 --> 00:05:59,026 I think he... 126 00:05:59,109 --> 00:06:00,589 Hey, hey, gang, quiet. Here she comes. 127 00:06:01,195 --> 00:06:05,074 Did you hear about that Danny guy? Heard he used to date Pam. 128 00:06:05,199 --> 00:06:07,868 So, four years ago, when I was in stamford, Connecticut, 129 00:06:07,952 --> 00:06:11,580 and dating someone else, Pam went on two dates with Danny, 130 00:06:11,664 --> 00:06:14,041 which was obviously the greatest love story ever told, 131 00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:16,186 given how much people are walking on eggshells around us. 132 00:06:16,210 --> 00:06:18,379 We were basically Romeo and Juliet. That's right. 133 00:06:18,462 --> 00:06:20,398 Except where Juliet doesn't have that great a time 134 00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:22,508 and Romeo doesn't call back after two dates. 135 00:06:22,591 --> 00:06:23,634 Yikes. 136 00:06:23,759 --> 00:06:26,428 But I've learned to love again. 137 00:06:26,512 --> 00:06:28,472 He's a cartoon sailor, oh! No. 138 00:06:28,556 --> 00:06:30,808 And he looks so handsome in his uniform. No. 139 00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:32,171 Please! No, I'm not gonna... no. 140 00:06:32,351 --> 00:06:34,687 Tuna! Tuna! 141 00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:37,439 If you want us to skip this party... 142 00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:38,606 I don't care. 143 00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:41,485 Kevin: I am never gonna forget what Danny did to Pam. 144 00:06:41,694 --> 00:06:43,320 I forget nothing. 145 00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:45,048 I'm like an elephant in that way. 146 00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,073 You know what else? 147 00:06:46,156 --> 00:06:49,118 This sucks for Jim, right? 148 00:06:49,201 --> 00:06:50,786 But it also sucks for us 149 00:06:50,869 --> 00:06:53,539 because we don't get invited to a ton of Halloween parties. 150 00:06:53,622 --> 00:06:56,250 Yeah. And like, everyone's gonna be there. 151 00:06:56,375 --> 00:06:57,960 Stanley, 152 00:06:58,043 --> 00:06:59,044 Phyllis, 153 00:06:59,128 --> 00:07:00,296 Angela, 154 00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:01,672 Darryl... 155 00:07:01,797 --> 00:07:03,841 Creed's a maybe. Creed's going? 156 00:07:06,594 --> 00:07:10,264 Madge from the warehouse just made her first sale. 157 00:07:10,347 --> 00:07:13,767 Madge! We should have been doing this a long time ago. 158 00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:21,275 Erin? Would you please do me a solid, 159 00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:24,528 and get Darryl philbin on the speakerphone? 160 00:07:28,866 --> 00:07:29,908 Hello? 161 00:07:29,992 --> 00:07:31,619 Hi, Darryl, come out here, please. 162 00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:33,704 I'm good. 163 00:07:33,996 --> 00:07:35,372 You need to stop being so shy, 164 00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:38,292 come out here and embrace who you really are, superstar. 165 00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:39,627 This is embarrassing, Michael. 166 00:07:39,710 --> 00:07:40,794 Michael: Yeah, I bet it is. 167 00:07:40,878 --> 00:07:42,796 You're gonna do your job well here, 168 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,673 you gotta get used to being embarrassed. 169 00:07:44,757 --> 00:07:46,050 Well, let me put my shoes on. 170 00:07:49,595 --> 00:07:51,096 Hit the speakerphone button. 171 00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:53,849 The speakerphone button. 172 00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,559 Same button as you hit before. 173 00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:57,662 Samem automated voice: Yburcaflcannot“ 174 00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:58,687 or sit on it. 175 00:07:58,896 --> 00:08:02,733 This whole delivery slash sales idea, you know whose that was? 176 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:03,942 That was Darryl philbin's. 177 00:08:04,193 --> 00:08:08,030 He thought of that way before the corporate fatsuits. 178 00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:10,199 So, what happened? I got in the way. 179 00:08:10,282 --> 00:08:12,201 I said, "no," 180 00:08:12,284 --> 00:08:14,370 and it just stopped. 181 00:08:14,453 --> 00:08:17,498 But then, corporate comes up with this idea. 182 00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:21,168 But you know what? They need to know that it was yours. 183 00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:22,920 And I don't care if I take a bullet. 184 00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:24,338 We are going to call them, 185 00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:26,621 we are gonna put them on speakerphone right now, oh. Oh. 186 00:08:26,757 --> 00:08:29,426 And we are going to straighten this out. 187 00:08:29,510 --> 00:08:32,096 Screw corporate! They probably stole the idea anyway. 188 00:08:32,262 --> 00:08:33,681 Michael: Mmm-hmm. 189 00:08:33,806 --> 00:08:34,949 Corporate stole nothing. Okay? 190 00:08:34,973 --> 00:08:36,517 Darryl brought this idea to me. 191 00:08:36,642 --> 00:08:39,103 And then I told them, giving Darryl full credit. So, 192 00:08:39,395 --> 00:08:41,105 no need to "screw corporate." 193 00:08:41,355 --> 00:08:43,941 Everyone, let's give Darryl a round of applause as planned. 194 00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:50,948 I'm a little peeved at Darryl right now. 195 00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,616 He went to Gabe behind your back! 196 00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:55,285 No, he didn't go behind my back. He went over my head. 197 00:08:55,369 --> 00:08:57,788 He went over your head to go behind your back. 198 00:08:58,497 --> 00:09:00,040 What is taking someone from behind? 199 00:09:00,124 --> 00:09:01,375 No. Shh. Michael, listen. 200 00:09:01,458 --> 00:09:03,978 This cannot stand. You can't have workers going straight to corporate. 201 00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,212 It makes your job superfluous. 202 00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:06,630 It was a good idea, though. 203 00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:10,551 Yeah, here's another good idea, corporate chain of command. 204 00:09:11,385 --> 00:09:15,013 We need to strangle Darryl's idea. 205 00:09:15,806 --> 00:09:17,099 Hey hey, Danny 206 00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:20,436 I'm really sorry, but we can't come to your party tonight. 207 00:09:20,519 --> 00:09:22,747 I was looking forward to throwing some darts with you guys. 208 00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:23,873 You were? Okay, well then... 209 00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:27,401 I mean, maybe we could do it like, next Halloween? 210 00:09:27,609 --> 00:09:28,689 For sure. We're just, like, 211 00:09:28,861 --> 00:09:30,279 totally caught in the middle here. 212 00:09:30,362 --> 00:09:31,488 What are you talking about? 213 00:09:31,947 --> 00:09:34,575 Well, Jim and Pam basically begged us not to go. 214 00:09:34,825 --> 00:09:36,493 Jim and Pam really don't want you to go? 215 00:09:36,952 --> 00:09:39,997 They're really upset about the whole Danny situation. 216 00:09:40,122 --> 00:09:41,248 I'll talk to 'em. 217 00:09:41,331 --> 00:09:44,835 Yeah, but do you know what? Don't tell them that we said anything to you. 218 00:09:45,669 --> 00:09:46,712 Okay. 219 00:09:46,795 --> 00:09:48,172 Okay? Or you're dead. 220 00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:49,256 Okay. 221 00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:50,340 Okay. 222 00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:55,262 Kelly! Great costume. 223 00:09:56,221 --> 00:10:00,058 Kelly! You cannot change costumes in the middle of the day! 224 00:10:00,184 --> 00:10:01,268 Pam, she's out. 225 00:10:01,894 --> 00:10:05,147 If I'm out, I'm gonna sue this entire company for discrimination. 226 00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,775 Guys, you're arguing over a one-in-sixteen chance, 227 00:10:07,900 --> 00:10:10,402 over a prize worth $40. 228 00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:12,070 Fifteen thousand bucks, Oscar. 229 00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:13,530 Yeah, shut it, Oscar. Pam? 230 00:10:13,781 --> 00:10:15,282 This is an amazing prize. 231 00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:17,367 I mean, I don't even wanna give Pam a compliment, 232 00:10:17,451 --> 00:10:20,954 'cause she's so, ugh... But she did a good job. 233 00:10:21,038 --> 00:10:22,278 I really want that coupon book. 234 00:10:22,664 --> 00:10:24,792 Garbage magnet. Garbage magnet. 235 00:10:24,875 --> 00:10:27,044 God! Magnets are interesting enough, 236 00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:30,172 you don't need to tart 'em up with some design. 237 00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:33,425 I can't believe this doesn't make you mad. 238 00:10:33,550 --> 00:10:34,990 What the hell are they talking about? 239 00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:39,139 Hmm. Kevin and Gabe? Probably about the extremes of the human physique. 240 00:10:39,223 --> 00:10:40,974 Do you think Kevin is going over my head? 241 00:10:41,099 --> 00:10:44,645 I don't... oh, my god. Okay. All right, all right, all right. 242 00:10:44,728 --> 00:10:47,564 You know what? That's inappropriate, Kevin. 243 00:10:47,689 --> 00:10:48,690 I am your boss. 244 00:10:48,774 --> 00:10:51,151 And if you have something to say, it goes through me, 245 00:10:51,318 --> 00:10:52,569 and then I take it to Gabe. 246 00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:54,363 Chain of command. Do you understand? 247 00:10:54,446 --> 00:10:56,198 I am so sorry. Oh, you're sorry? 248 00:10:56,323 --> 00:10:58,043 I just thought... what did you just thought? 249 00:10:58,575 --> 00:11:00,327 Well, Gabe asked me if there were 250 00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:03,080 any really cool lady gaga moves 251 00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:04,665 that he could do for the catwalk. 252 00:11:05,374 --> 00:11:06,917 And so, then I told... 253 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,377 All right. 254 00:11:08,460 --> 00:11:10,587 I told him that there was this one cool move 255 00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:12,923 where she powers down like a robot. 256 00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:14,007 Okay. 257 00:11:14,091 --> 00:11:15,884 Okay? But I'm so sorry that... 258 00:11:15,968 --> 00:11:17,237 All right. I didn't tell you first. 259 00:11:17,261 --> 00:11:19,346 Well, don't let it happen again. 260 00:11:19,429 --> 00:11:22,015 You think that I would let this happen again? 261 00:11:22,099 --> 00:11:23,767 No way, Jose! 262 00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:28,939 You, Gabe. 263 00:11:30,274 --> 00:11:32,818 Can you imagine? It's just crazy. 264 00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:33,944 Jim: That is crazy. 265 00:11:34,236 --> 00:11:36,339 We would never care if Andy or Kevin went to your party. 266 00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:38,448 Look, I'm just glad we can laugh about it, 267 00:11:38,574 --> 00:11:41,034 because I was a little nervous about coming to work here, 268 00:11:41,118 --> 00:11:42,536 with, you know, our history. 269 00:11:42,744 --> 00:11:45,064 Oh, my gosh. Everyone keeps blowing that out of proportion. 270 00:11:45,122 --> 00:11:47,165 It's not even a history. Exactly. 271 00:11:47,291 --> 00:11:49,960 It's not like you guys had some long relationship, right? 272 00:11:50,711 --> 00:11:51,896 Big painful breakup I don't know about? 273 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,005 No! 274 00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:54,548 Two or three dates. It was two. 275 00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:56,300 Was it two? I thought it was three. 276 00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:59,094 No, we had plans for a third, 277 00:11:59,177 --> 00:12:01,680 but then, I don't know, you never called me back. So... 278 00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:03,265 Oh! You can't handle the truth! 279 00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:06,310 Well, that does not sound like me. 280 00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:08,812 Yeah. It was, though. That's what happened. 281 00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,632 Well, great, I just wanted to make sure things weren't weird. 282 00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:15,861 Uh-uh. 283 00:12:18,488 --> 00:12:20,991 Okay. This whole going over my head gate 284 00:12:21,116 --> 00:12:22,534 is making people act weird. 285 00:12:22,784 --> 00:12:23,994 Chain of command is crumbling. 286 00:12:24,119 --> 00:12:26,239 Do you know what just happened? I just made Kevin cry. 287 00:12:26,580 --> 00:12:29,750 And Gabe looks like lady gaga. That's not Halloween. 288 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:33,170 Halloween should be a day in which we honor monsters 289 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,504 and not be mad at each other. 290 00:12:34,588 --> 00:12:36,340 I'm not mad. Are you mad? 291 00:12:36,465 --> 00:12:38,926 You went over my head, and then you lied to my face. 292 00:12:39,009 --> 00:12:41,428 So, my head and my face have taken a beating. 293 00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:44,306 Well, I'm sorry if it seems that way to you. 294 00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:45,474 Okay, that might help. 295 00:12:45,557 --> 00:12:47,684 If you said "I'm sorry" in front of everybody... 296 00:12:47,851 --> 00:12:48,936 Mike... in front of me. 297 00:12:49,019 --> 00:12:52,147 You made a bad call and I fixed it. 298 00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:53,941 So, I'm not apologizing. 299 00:12:54,066 --> 00:12:55,734 So, that's it? 300 00:12:56,193 --> 00:12:57,527 That's it. Is it? 301 00:12:57,903 --> 00:12:58,987 Yes. 302 00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:03,533 Sookie! 303 00:13:06,328 --> 00:13:08,038 Bill Compton from true blood. 304 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:11,333 How many freaking vampires am I supposed to care about these days? 305 00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:13,628 Well, I guess you could say I'm still in costume. 306 00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:16,380 I'm a rational "consumer." 307 00:13:17,047 --> 00:13:18,340 Oh. Oh, yeah. So, it's... 308 00:13:20,550 --> 00:13:22,594 This stupid coupon booklet. 309 00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:25,343 Have you seen my costume? I'm a rational "consumer." 310 00:13:25,389 --> 00:13:27,849 Yeah, I heard you say it to Phyllis. That's a good line. 311 00:13:28,016 --> 00:13:30,477 Okay, everybody. After you walk the runway, 312 00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:33,021 everyone has to vote for who gets the coupon book. 313 00:13:33,105 --> 00:13:34,481 And you can't vote for yourself. 314 00:13:34,564 --> 00:13:36,984 Pam, can you vote for other people? 315 00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:40,070 Hey, I gotta get in on this. Hey, it's cool, man. 316 00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:43,240 I work in the warehouse. I'm cool! 317 00:13:43,407 --> 00:13:45,200 I'm hip and I'm jive! 318 00:13:45,534 --> 00:13:47,619 But I don't care aboutnobody! 319 00:13:47,911 --> 00:13:49,287 Do you know who I am? 320 00:13:49,413 --> 00:13:52,290 Happy Halloween, jerk! 321 00:13:53,375 --> 00:13:54,710 Still don't know who I am? 322 00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,461 I'll give you a hint. 323 00:13:56,837 --> 00:13:58,588 I go over other people's heads. 324 00:13:58,797 --> 00:14:00,048 Michael, this is a bad idea. 325 00:14:00,132 --> 00:14:01,341 What's a bad idea? 326 00:14:01,591 --> 00:14:04,428 Dressing up as somebody. I mean, when has that ever worked for you? 327 00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:05,595 Neveh 328 00:14:06,430 --> 00:14:09,224 okay, you know what, fine. I'm not Darryl. 329 00:14:09,933 --> 00:14:11,143 And thank god I'm not Darryl. 330 00:14:11,309 --> 00:14:13,437 Could you have for once just let us enjoy a party, 331 00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,272 instead of making it about all your issues? 332 00:14:25,741 --> 00:14:26,742 That's a warrior! 333 00:14:33,290 --> 00:14:36,793 I present to you the rational "consumer," 334 00:14:37,294 --> 00:14:38,295 as it were. 335 00:14:46,303 --> 00:14:48,096 Todd: Slow, nice and slow, honey. 336 00:14:48,180 --> 00:14:49,389 Pam: Angela as a nurse. 337 00:14:49,514 --> 00:14:51,194 Dont_.no, slow it down. Creed: There it is. 338 00:14:51,266 --> 00:14:52,493 Angela: I don't like your tone. 339 00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:55,479 Look, they were sold out of all the other costumes, okay? 340 00:14:57,314 --> 00:14:59,316 I think we all live in the real world here. 341 00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:02,903 Let's not pretend to be unaware of what sells in this office. 342 00:15:03,028 --> 00:15:04,130 Phyllis: What should we ask? 343 00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:05,739 Hey, can I play? 344 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:09,451 Why don't you ask if Darryl is a bad friend 345 00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:10,827 who backstabs people in the back? 346 00:15:11,328 --> 00:15:14,208 We have one question to ask the spirit world and you want us to ask that? 347 00:15:14,831 --> 00:15:15,999 He says no. 348 00:15:16,083 --> 00:15:17,834 Uh, Darryl moved it. You moved it. 349 00:15:19,127 --> 00:15:20,807 Hey, Dwight, you saw Darryl move it, right? 350 00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:25,550 Let's just say I saw exactly what the two of you wanted me to see. 351 00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,677 I know how to sit on a fence. 352 00:15:27,803 --> 00:15:30,347 Hell, I can even sleep on a fence. 353 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:33,683 The trick is to do it face down with the post in your mouth. 354 00:15:33,975 --> 00:15:36,144 If you had one word you would use to describe Darryl, 355 00:15:36,228 --> 00:15:37,687 what would that word be? 356 00:15:39,481 --> 00:15:40,524 Erin: A... 357 00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:49,616 H... no! 358 00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:52,077 Uh. E... 359 00:15:53,829 --> 00:15:54,913 An asset. 360 00:15:58,583 --> 00:15:59,584 That's enough. 361 00:16:03,713 --> 00:16:05,753 I don't think it's gonna work out the way you think. 362 00:16:06,133 --> 00:16:07,384 I don't think you get it. 363 00:16:10,387 --> 00:16:11,888 Hey. Hey. 364 00:16:11,972 --> 00:16:13,098 This is some party, huh? 365 00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:15,433 When you work hard, you play hard around here. 366 00:16:15,517 --> 00:16:16,560 Evenifyou don't work hard. 367 00:16:19,521 --> 00:16:20,730 Oh, here's something. 368 00:16:21,982 --> 00:16:24,776 Why didn't you ever call Pam back? 369 00:16:25,068 --> 00:16:26,069 Senous? 370 00:16:27,070 --> 00:16:30,073 Yeah. I mean, I'm not saying that everybody has to fall in love or anything. 371 00:16:30,198 --> 00:16:31,425 I'm just saying, but... to, you know, 372 00:16:31,449 --> 00:16:32,868 to not even call her back is... 373 00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,495 You know what it was? I think she gave me her number, 374 00:16:35,579 --> 00:16:37,622 but then, her fours look like eights and... 375 00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:38,707 Could be. 376 00:16:38,790 --> 00:16:42,169 But you also called her the second time, so you had the number right. 377 00:16:42,252 --> 00:16:43,253 Todd: Halpert, 378 00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:45,797 you looking for someone to bang your wife? 379 00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:47,257 Okay. No. 380 00:16:48,758 --> 00:16:49,759 You want to know? 381 00:16:51,428 --> 00:16:53,447 I didn't call her back because she spent the whole date 382 00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:54,598 talking about you. 383 00:16:55,265 --> 00:16:57,934 She was obviously in love with you. 384 00:17:00,270 --> 00:17:01,688 Fifty-seven, fifty-eight... 385 00:17:01,771 --> 00:17:03,398 Wait, wait. She hasn't moved in a while. 386 00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:04,983 Erin! 387 00:17:05,066 --> 00:17:08,028 Two! I got two! I ate two whole apples! 388 00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:15,118 I'd remember talking about Jim. That wasn't it. 389 00:17:15,202 --> 00:17:17,662 Just tell her the real reason. 390 00:17:18,121 --> 00:17:20,141 Do you honestly wanna know why I didn't call her back 391 00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:21,541 on a date over four years ago? 392 00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:22,876 Hey, she had a nice time. 393 00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:23,959 It seems rude. Well... 394 00:17:24,002 --> 00:17:25,629 I did. Yeah, and it's one of those things 395 00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:27,297 that's just gonna keep gnawing at me. 396 00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:30,634 Like, gnaw, gnaw... "Why? Why didn't he? I have no idea why." 397 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,428 Okay, honestly, I didn't call you back 398 00:17:33,511 --> 00:17:35,722 because I just thought you seemed a little 399 00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:36,848 dorky. 400 00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:41,436 Hey, man_. Thank you! 401 00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:44,147 Thank you. I got it. 402 00:17:44,314 --> 00:17:45,774 Now I know. 403 00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:49,152 You thought I was a little dorky. You know? 404 00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:56,493 Okay. Well, excuse me. 405 00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:01,248 In the future, you need to get Michael's approval on anything 406 00:18:01,331 --> 00:18:03,041 before coming to me. Thank you. 407 00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:05,001 You're gonna miss out on some good ideas. 408 00:18:05,293 --> 00:18:07,837 Okay, well, obviously if it's a really, really good idea, 409 00:18:07,921 --> 00:18:09,047 then my door is open. 410 00:18:09,172 --> 00:18:11,675 If they're good ideas, I'm not gonna say, "no." 411 00:18:11,841 --> 00:18:12,902 You said, "no" to this one. 412 00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:15,345 That's... okay, I make one mistake in 15 years 413 00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:16,972 and you drag me over the coals. 414 00:18:17,097 --> 00:18:18,199 After everything I did for you? 415 00:18:18,223 --> 00:18:19,263 What have you done for me? 416 00:18:19,516 --> 00:18:21,351 Oh, well... what have you done for me? 417 00:18:21,476 --> 00:18:23,395 Ed truck hired me. 418 00:18:23,478 --> 00:18:24,896 Jo promoted me. 419 00:18:24,980 --> 00:18:28,358 Gabe listened to me. All you've ever done was say, "no" to me. 420 00:18:31,069 --> 00:18:33,113 I have ambition, 421 00:18:33,196 --> 00:18:35,115 and you kept me at the same level for years. 422 00:18:36,199 --> 00:18:37,534 Dropping bombs, right? 423 00:18:39,536 --> 00:18:40,680 This really make you think, Michael? 424 00:18:40,704 --> 00:18:43,248 Stop it. Stop. Stop. We're thinking. 425 00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:45,792 We're thinking about it. Gabe: Yeah. 426 00:18:45,875 --> 00:18:48,271 You don't have to point to the fact that we're thinking about it. 427 00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:49,879 Stop it. Just let us think. 428 00:18:51,715 --> 00:18:55,051 Okay, next time you have a really great idea, 429 00:18:55,135 --> 00:18:57,095 we will put it in a hat, 430 00:18:57,887 --> 00:19:00,640 and then we will have Erin pick it out of the hat and let her decide. 431 00:19:00,724 --> 00:19:02,204 I don't understand the point of a hat. 432 00:19:03,059 --> 00:19:04,287 You're right, we don't need a hat. 433 00:19:04,311 --> 00:19:06,021 I am not budging on the hat issue. 434 00:19:06,104 --> 00:19:08,648 Okay, we're gonna table the hat question. 435 00:19:08,732 --> 00:19:10,150 The best ideas are gonna come to me. 436 00:19:10,233 --> 00:19:12,569 I make the final decision, penod. 437 00:19:13,153 --> 00:19:16,948 Okay, we both reserve the right to go to Jo if we disagree with Gabe. 438 00:19:17,907 --> 00:19:18,992 Okay. Darryl: Fair enough. 439 00:19:19,242 --> 00:19:22,078 Why don't we simplify this? Darryl brings it to Michael, 440 00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:24,831 Michael brings it to me, no one calls Jo. 441 00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:28,376 Unless you and I decide we wanna talk to Jo, 442 00:19:28,460 --> 00:19:29,544 then we'll give her a call. 443 00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:31,171 Cool. 444 00:19:31,254 --> 00:19:33,173 Hey, sorry I left. 445 00:19:33,256 --> 00:19:35,425 I'm sorry I was a jerk. 446 00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:38,511 Michael: Friends fight. 447 00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:40,805 Friends fight. 448 00:19:41,014 --> 00:19:42,015 What's up, man? 449 00:19:42,557 --> 00:19:43,909 Sometimes it seems like it was better 450 00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:45,213 down in the warehouse, you know? 451 00:19:45,268 --> 00:19:47,020 When I was a freshman in college, 452 00:19:47,103 --> 00:19:49,105 I worked at the student newspaper, 453 00:19:49,189 --> 00:19:51,316 the Cornell daily sun. This was at Cornell. 454 00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:54,694 I had to write an op-ed column every day, "Bernard's regards." 455 00:19:55,236 --> 00:19:56,571 This was your freshman year? 456 00:19:56,946 --> 00:19:59,991 I started to ask myself, do I have big plans here? 457 00:20:00,408 --> 00:20:02,952 I didn't wanna become editor of that paper, so 458 00:20:03,244 --> 00:20:05,580 igotup and walked right out of Walter Bernard hall, 459 00:20:05,955 --> 00:20:07,791 and that's actually when I heard 460 00:20:08,083 --> 00:20:09,959 eight male voices 461 00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:11,336 singing, 462 00:20:12,087 --> 00:20:14,005 unencumbered by instruments. 463 00:20:14,923 --> 00:20:15,924 I was hooked. 464 00:20:16,007 --> 00:20:20,095 So, is becoming ceo of this company 465 00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:23,681 your a cappella group? 466 00:20:25,392 --> 00:20:27,435 Come on. We're going to Danny's bar, public school. 467 00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:29,312 No, I got some work to do. 468 00:20:29,771 --> 00:20:31,981 I do have big plans at this company. 469 00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:34,401 Erin: She... it was fantastic. Yeah. 470 00:20:34,484 --> 00:20:35,985 It was like a little gentle... 471 00:20:37,404 --> 00:20:39,964 Jim: To be honest, I still can't believe he didn't call her back. 472 00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:43,952 Who doesn't call a dork like that back? 473 00:20:46,162 --> 00:20:47,997 Oh! Wow! 474 00:20:48,164 --> 00:20:49,416 Spinach in a can! 475 00:20:49,499 --> 00:20:50,834 Power from spinach! 476 00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:51,960 Ag, ag, ag, ag, ag, ag! 477 00:20:52,043 --> 00:20:53,253 Oh, my hero! 478 00:20:58,216 --> 00:21:01,010 Pam: Okay, everyone, I've tallied the votes, and the winner 479 00:21:01,511 --> 00:21:03,721 of the costume celebration spectacular 480 00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,807 and the Scranton-wilkes-barre coupon book, 481 00:21:05,890 --> 00:21:07,058 Oscar Martinez. 482 00:21:08,518 --> 00:21:09,519 Phyllis: Who? 483 00:21:12,856 --> 00:21:14,274 If I have to vote for someone, 484 00:21:14,357 --> 00:21:16,526 I don't want it to be someone who can beat me. 485 00:21:17,569 --> 00:21:20,321 Shake things up. I'm a nader guy. 486 00:21:21,197 --> 00:21:25,160 Best Edward James olmos costume I've ever seen. 487 00:21:26,202 --> 00:21:27,871 Like, freaky good.