1 00:00:01,335 --> 00:00:04,379 Gabe: The sabre code of conduct outlines the governing principles 2 00:00:04,630 --> 00:00:08,967 key to establishing and maintaining trust with our employees, clients... 3 00:00:09,051 --> 00:00:10,719 Oh, my god, kill me. 4 00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:13,972 Hey. All right, obviously, we all want to die, 5 00:00:14,056 --> 00:00:18,852 but we have to get through this, so Gabe, go ahead. It's okay. 6 00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:21,313 Oh, is it... Is it okay with you? 7 00:00:21,438 --> 00:00:23,565 Because if it's not, you work for me, so... 8 00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:25,150 Comply with all applicable laws, 9 00:00:25,275 --> 00:00:26,635 regulations, policies and contracts 10 00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:27,778 governing our business. 11 00:00:28,070 --> 00:00:29,255 Be honest, fair... I'm going to do it. 12 00:00:29,279 --> 00:00:32,282 Trustworthy in all your business activities and relationships. 13 00:00:32,783 --> 00:00:35,202 Treat one another... Oh! I'm going into labor! 14 00:00:35,786 --> 00:00:37,138 Okay. She's going into labor! Oh, my goodness. 15 00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:38,163 Make way, everybody! 16 00:00:38,497 --> 00:00:40,499 I know it's wrong to fake going into labor 17 00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:42,668 just to get out of things, but sometimes, 18 00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:43,919 it's necessary. 19 00:00:44,419 --> 00:00:45,420 I'm going into labor. 20 00:00:45,504 --> 00:00:47,047 But should I have corn dogs or... 21 00:00:47,172 --> 00:00:48,757 I'm going into labor! 22 00:00:48,924 --> 00:00:50,924 Okay, three reasons you are wrong about true blood. 23 00:00:51,260 --> 00:00:53,136 Number one... I'm going into labor. 24 00:00:56,139 --> 00:00:57,182 Here we go! 25 00:00:57,266 --> 00:01:00,394 Hey, guys, you can't keep saying you're going into labor. 26 00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:01,757 Everyone knows you're full of it. 27 00:01:01,937 --> 00:01:03,122 Kelly: Yeah. Oscar: It's not fair, you guys. 28 00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:04,466 Kelly: Pitiful. Angela: So stupid. 29 00:01:04,982 --> 00:01:05,983 Kevin: Never cry wolf. 30 00:01:06,191 --> 00:01:07,859 Okay. Okay. 31 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:11,196 Oh. Oh! Oh, my gosh! 32 00:01:11,321 --> 00:01:13,240 Oh, my god, Pam! 33 00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:15,951 I'm really in labor! This is happening. 34 00:01:16,034 --> 00:01:17,286 Okay. Okay, guys. 35 00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:18,579 Here we go. We'll see you. 36 00:01:19,329 --> 00:01:20,330 How do you feel? 37 00:01:20,497 --> 00:01:21,957 Drive carefully! Good luck! 38 00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:23,709 Bye! Oscar: Good luck! 39 00:01:28,380 --> 00:01:29,715 False alarm. 40 00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:55,032 What? They took another client from us? 41 00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:56,700 Okay, bye. 42 00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:01,747 Man, business is war. 43 00:02:03,206 --> 00:02:05,500 Customers, clients, it's like a war out there. 44 00:02:06,001 --> 00:02:07,544 I am a leader, 45 00:02:08,545 --> 00:02:12,007 but you can only inspire people so much in a place like this. 46 00:02:12,674 --> 00:02:16,219 So today, I'm turning the inspire factor up to 10. 47 00:02:16,303 --> 00:02:20,015 With a little help from my friend, america's bloodiest battle. 48 00:02:21,725 --> 00:02:25,270 Why even read business books? We should be studying war. 49 00:02:25,354 --> 00:02:27,564 Going to places like gettysburg. Where is that? 50 00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:28,899 It's right here in pa. 51 00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:31,276 Ah! 52 00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:36,239 Well, we should take a field trip there. I mean, that would be so cool. 53 00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:37,759 I wonder if that bus downstairs is... 54 00:02:37,783 --> 00:02:40,410 Okay, Andy. We get it. It's a trip to gettysburg. 55 00:02:40,619 --> 00:02:43,080 That sounds super inspiring! I'm in! 56 00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:44,915 Gettysburg? Hmm. Could be interesting. 57 00:02:45,082 --> 00:02:46,842 Second most northern battle in the civil war. 58 00:02:46,917 --> 00:02:49,628 Actually, it is the northernmost. 59 00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:53,423 The civil war history industry 60 00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:57,177 has conveniently forgotten about the battle of schrute farms. 61 00:02:57,552 --> 00:03:01,765 Whatever. I'm over it. It's just grossly irresponsible. 62 00:03:02,265 --> 00:03:03,767 Charge! 63 00:03:04,226 --> 00:03:05,936 Well, this could be fun. 64 00:03:06,478 --> 00:03:08,438 Yeah, well, the bus has free Wi-Fi, 65 00:03:08,605 --> 00:03:12,275 and I made special low sugar lunches for everyone. 66 00:03:12,401 --> 00:03:14,695 And is anyone kosher or halal? 67 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:15,778 What's the halal option? 68 00:03:15,821 --> 00:03:18,615 Dates, tabouleh and bagel with cream cheese. 69 00:03:18,740 --> 00:03:19,741 Out. 70 00:03:19,825 --> 00:03:23,578 You know, it's the same as the kosher option. There's a lesson in there. 71 00:03:24,121 --> 00:03:26,832 I mean, I can't force you to go, you're not my slaves. 72 00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:28,709 Thanks to gettysburg. 73 00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,252 But who's coming with me? 74 00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:32,379 I'm in. I'm in, too. 75 00:03:33,964 --> 00:03:37,134 I guess I'm a sucker for historical fiction. 76 00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:39,386 Anyone who's not going, you're dead to me. 77 00:03:39,511 --> 00:03:41,471 You're uninvited. I don't want you to come. 78 00:03:41,763 --> 00:03:44,015 But fyi, there will be leftover 79 00:03:44,099 --> 00:03:45,892 Turkey and Pesto sammies in the fridge. 80 00:03:45,976 --> 00:03:46,977 Yes! 81 00:03:47,352 --> 00:03:49,062 One for you. Cool, thanks. 82 00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:50,355 And one for you. 83 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:51,732 Cool, thanks. 84 00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:55,193 Oh! You missed your head. There you go. 85 00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:56,570 Phyllis, think fast! 86 00:03:58,488 --> 00:04:01,366 All right, guys, a little foreplay before we do it. 87 00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:05,746 Fans of Ken burns' jazz will most certainly enjoy the civil war. 88 00:04:05,829 --> 00:04:07,469 You know, I just got limitless on my iPad. 89 00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:09,082 I bet I could get it on the TV. 90 00:04:09,166 --> 00:04:12,335 Oh, isn't that the one where the guy becomes limitless? 91 00:04:12,419 --> 00:04:15,481 It's just not appropriate. If we were going to visit Bradley Cooper's birthplace, 92 00:04:15,505 --> 00:04:17,400 I'd be the first one suggesting that. I'd be rooting for it... 93 00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:20,802 Limitless, limitless, limitless, limitless, limitless! 94 00:04:20,886 --> 00:04:22,366 Andy: All right, all right, all right! 95 00:04:24,347 --> 00:04:25,348 Here. 96 00:04:25,682 --> 00:04:27,684 Pam: Like it? Kevin: Oh, by the picnic table? 97 00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:29,352 Then you've got to get the fire pit. 98 00:04:29,770 --> 00:04:31,938 I can't get a fire pit, I have two babies. 99 00:04:32,022 --> 00:04:34,142 Kevin: But the fire pit is a no-brainer. Oh, hi there. 100 00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:38,195 Hi, Robert. Hey. Um, how are you doing? Good to see you again. 101 00:04:38,570 --> 00:04:40,530 Where is everyone? Where is Andy? 102 00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:41,934 Andy took some of the other people 103 00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:43,472 on a corporate retreat to gettysburg. 104 00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:48,580 Well, I was hoping to talk out some ideas with Andy. 105 00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:55,545 But what we have here is perhaps better. 106 00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:58,840 By not going on the trip, you've shown 107 00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:01,218 you're the free thinkers of the office. 108 00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:04,304 Robert, you've got your sheep, and you got your black sheep. 109 00:05:04,387 --> 00:05:07,098 And I'm not even a sheep. I am on the freaking moon. 110 00:05:09,392 --> 00:05:11,228 So, here's what we can do. 111 00:05:11,937 --> 00:05:12,938 Game changers. 112 00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:15,816 Changes to the game, such that the game 113 00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:18,318 can never be played the same way again. 114 00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:22,155 Everyone, brainstorm some innovations. 115 00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:25,492 Don't be afraid to get weird with it. 116 00:05:26,952 --> 00:05:28,078 Meredith! 117 00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:31,540 Excited. 118 00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:35,919 Okay. 119 00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:49,975 You guys, get excited! 120 00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:51,268 Movie's almost over. 121 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:56,481 All right, we're here. Limitless can wait. 122 00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:00,694 Fun fact. In France, they call limitless 123 00:06:00,819 --> 00:06:02,737 "the man with many capabilities." 124 00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:07,951 Whoo-hoo! Ladies and gentlemen, the 1800s await you. 125 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,162 We can watch limitless on the way back. 126 00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:13,123 I got source code on the way back. 127 00:06:15,166 --> 00:06:16,167 Whoo! 128 00:06:18,169 --> 00:06:19,504 Where are you going? 129 00:06:20,672 --> 00:06:23,216 Visitors' center. Going to grab a map for the memorials, right? 130 00:06:23,300 --> 00:06:25,660 We're not going to the visitors' center. We're not tourists. 131 00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:26,821 No, of course we're not tourists. 132 00:06:26,845 --> 00:06:29,115 We're just people that aren't from here who are taking a tour. 133 00:06:29,139 --> 00:06:31,474 Yeah, the sign says, "begin tour here." 134 00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:35,061 Unless you're going on the very specially created 135 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:37,731 and meticulously researched Andy Bernard tour. 136 00:06:38,815 --> 00:06:40,650 After chancellorsville, 137 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:44,863 Lee brought his army up the shenandoah valley, right through here. 138 00:06:44,946 --> 00:06:49,200 They stopped in this field for a picnic, which they called "lunch." 139 00:06:49,451 --> 00:06:50,952 Erin: Yeah, but I'm confused... 140 00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:52,579 Total deaths belongs to gettysburg. 141 00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:55,016 But when you're talking about dpa, that's deaths per acre... 142 00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:57,120 Uh-huh... nothing beats the battle of schrute farms. 143 00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,753 Oh, dpa sounds way more important... oh, it is. 144 00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:02,648 And you should read some of these letters that the soldiers wrote home. 145 00:07:02,672 --> 00:07:04,799 I mean, it makes the battle of gettysburg 146 00:07:04,883 --> 00:07:07,283 sound like a bunch of schoolgirls wrestling over a hairbrush. 147 00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:13,266 I'm telling you, they're heartbreaking, too. So beautifully written. 148 00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:15,185 Dwight, what are you telling this girl? 149 00:07:15,352 --> 00:07:16,561 The truth. 150 00:07:16,645 --> 00:07:19,445 Stop filling her head with nonsense, okay? She doesn't know any better. 151 00:07:19,689 --> 00:07:21,191 Oscar, I'm so glad you just got here. 152 00:07:21,316 --> 00:07:22,835 I would have believed everything he said. 153 00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:25,028 No, no, no. You're filling her head with nonsense. 154 00:07:25,236 --> 00:07:27,530 You and the history books. I'm telling the truth! 155 00:07:27,614 --> 00:07:28,823 Interesting. 156 00:07:28,949 --> 00:07:30,158 Yes, thank you. 157 00:07:30,241 --> 00:07:32,535 All of history has been whitewashed. 158 00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:34,939 Really? Why don't you tell us the real history, Gore vidal? 159 00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:36,998 Okay, I will. I don't know who that is, 160 00:07:37,082 --> 00:07:38,184 but I'm going to tell you this. 161 00:07:38,208 --> 00:07:39,208 He's a historian. 162 00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:42,545 Gettysburg was very important. Credit where credit is due, okay? 163 00:07:42,629 --> 00:07:45,048 Big mad props to gettysburg. 164 00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:48,551 Was it, however, the most northern battle of the civil war? 165 00:07:48,927 --> 00:07:50,154 Yes, yes... not by a long shot! 166 00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:51,178 Yes! 167 00:07:51,262 --> 00:07:54,307 No, it was not! No, it was not! 168 00:07:54,391 --> 00:07:56,059 Was it the second most northern? 169 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,394 What? 170 00:07:57,477 --> 00:08:00,146 Sure! I would cede it was the second most northern battle... 171 00:08:00,230 --> 00:08:01,272 Erin! 172 00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:03,376 Was it the northernmost? No! Get out of here, Oscar... 173 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:04,401 Get out of here! 174 00:08:04,609 --> 00:08:10,240 I am so eager to hear your game changers. Let's dig in, shall we? 175 00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:12,325 May I go first? Absolutely. 176 00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:18,289 Raw fish. The disgusting food from Japan 177 00:08:18,373 --> 00:08:20,041 that Americans would never want to eat. 178 00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:22,085 Now, we can't get enough of it. 179 00:08:22,460 --> 00:08:26,589 From movie stars to construction workers, Sushi is what's for dinner. 180 00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:33,263 Let me throw another idea at you. Origami. What? 181 00:08:33,805 --> 00:08:37,559 The crazy art of paper folding from, that's right, Japan. 182 00:08:38,101 --> 00:08:40,270 Don't you wish you could go back to 1980 183 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:43,148 and open the first Sushi restaurant in Manhattan? 184 00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:45,734 We can do that with 185 00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:50,447 origami, it's the Sushi of paper. 186 00:08:51,239 --> 00:08:52,490 This idea hasn't gripped me. 187 00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:55,011 What else did you come up with? 188 00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,953 I had to memorize the presentation, Robert, 189 00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:59,080 and it took a long time to build the swan, so. 190 00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:00,498 That was bad. 191 00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:04,044 If your woman is like mine, 192 00:09:04,127 --> 00:09:06,796 I bet you come home to hear the same thing all the time. 193 00:09:07,589 --> 00:09:10,258 "This paper is so hard. It scratches. 194 00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:13,053 "Why can't there be a paperjust for me?" 195 00:09:13,136 --> 00:09:14,304 Well, now there is. 196 00:09:18,141 --> 00:09:21,686 It's pink, scented and silky soft. 197 00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:25,982 Now, you can watch the game, and she can write a letter to her sister. 198 00:09:27,150 --> 00:09:30,904 The situation you described, returning home to a wife complaining about 199 00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:33,547 her paper being too masculine, is not one that I'm familiar with. 200 00:09:34,157 --> 00:09:36,826 In the African American community. 201 00:09:38,369 --> 00:09:39,829 Thought it was worth a try. 202 00:09:40,663 --> 00:09:42,040 That's fascinating. 203 00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:45,001 Tell me, what's the significance of the peach orchard, though? 204 00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:47,438 Well, that's a great question. Actually, some of the most... 205 00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:49,302 Dwight: Excuse me, I've got a question for you. 206 00:09:49,839 --> 00:09:51,841 Can you tell us about the battle of schrute farms? 207 00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:53,789 Oh, I haven't heard of that one. 208 00:09:53,885 --> 00:09:56,763 Really? Okay, follow-up question, 209 00:09:56,846 --> 00:09:58,926 how much are they paying you to keep your mouth shut? 210 00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:03,228 I apologize for my friend. And for the Republicans who are cutting your funding. 211 00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:05,230 We don't need to bother this poor gentleman. 212 00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:07,315 I know exactly where we're going. Giddy-up! 213 00:10:09,150 --> 00:10:10,527 Tallyho! 214 00:10:12,862 --> 00:10:14,114 Are you Lincoln? 215 00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:15,490 No, no, I'm... 216 00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:20,203 Apparently, I bear a passing resemblance to Abraham Lincoln. 217 00:10:20,328 --> 00:10:21,847 It makes it kind of hard for me to go to places 218 00:10:21,871 --> 00:10:23,873 like museums, historical monuments, 219 00:10:23,998 --> 00:10:26,000 elementary schools. I don't see it. 220 00:10:26,501 --> 00:10:28,821 Chelsea, give Mr. Lincoln your hat so I can take a picture. 221 00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:30,463 Okay, quick. 222 00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:34,384 Man: Hey, Lincoln's starting. 223 00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:40,056 Oh, no. No, no, no, no. I'm actually with a tour group myself, so... 224 00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:45,895 Hello, I'm Abraham Lincoln. 225 00:10:46,729 --> 00:10:49,107 Some people call me the "great emancipator," 226 00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:51,234 but you might know me from the penny. 227 00:10:53,194 --> 00:10:55,989 Okay, you know the test booklets 228 00:10:56,072 --> 00:10:57,991 that they give out in all the schools? 229 00:10:58,074 --> 00:11:00,154 I was thinking that we could put a coupon in the back 230 00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:03,079 that people would mail in to us. 231 00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:06,124 And as, you know, as I tell it, I don't like it. 232 00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:09,878 Unless, of course, you are responding to it. I am not. 233 00:11:10,461 --> 00:11:12,301 Um, excuse me, I'm going to go to the bathroom. 234 00:11:13,047 --> 00:11:15,091 At this point, when you're this pregnant, 235 00:11:15,216 --> 00:11:17,260 it's kind of like senior spring. 236 00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:20,430 The other day, I spit my gum out on the carpet. 237 00:11:21,097 --> 00:11:23,057 Kevin. You've been quiet. 238 00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:26,269 I'm curious to know what your game changer is. 239 00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:28,783 Kevin: You know how in the vending machine, 240 00:11:28,938 --> 00:11:32,775 they have the chocolate chip cookies in the a-1 spot? 241 00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:34,360 They do that because they think 242 00:11:34,444 --> 00:11:36,613 a-1 is the best spot for the best cookie. 243 00:11:37,572 --> 00:11:40,617 But the real best spot is d-4. 244 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,785 Right? That's where the eyes go. 245 00:11:45,622 --> 00:11:49,459 Cookies. Cookie placement. 246 00:11:50,001 --> 00:11:52,420 Yeah. But not just the cookies, though. 247 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,006 That was just a for instance. 248 00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:57,592 Who else agrees with Kevin 249 00:11:57,675 --> 00:12:02,472 that we're wasting facilities, manpower on our underselling products, 250 00:12:02,597 --> 00:12:05,808 when we should be pushing our top performers? 251 00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:16,736 There you get consensus. 252 00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:18,640 Okay, we are now on a planet where 253 00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:21,115 Kevin is the most creative person around 254 00:12:21,658 --> 00:12:24,953 and I am just some good looking guy. 255 00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:27,538 I just don't understand. 256 00:12:27,622 --> 00:12:30,667 It's 1865, victory is ours, 257 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:35,838 I have saved the very soul of our nation and yet, happiness eludes me. 258 00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:42,971 Oh, perhaps a trip to the theater will enliven my spirits. 259 00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:44,347 Children: No! 260 00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:49,018 So, another thing about oatmeal cookies. Who even wants them? 261 00:12:49,644 --> 00:12:52,897 I mean, I've seen Toby eat one like once, 262 00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:56,651 but other than that, forget it. 263 00:12:57,193 --> 00:12:58,528 Interesting. 264 00:13:00,738 --> 00:13:04,826 So what is dunder Mifflin's oatmeal cookie? 265 00:13:05,201 --> 00:13:07,912 What is the product that no one wants? 266 00:13:08,371 --> 00:13:11,374 How about that two-hole punch letter? 267 00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:15,253 Only the lawyers want that punch at the top, and they use legal. 268 00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:21,718 That's the oatmeal cookie. Fantastic, Kevin, fantastic. 269 00:13:22,093 --> 00:13:23,344 Thank you. 270 00:13:24,220 --> 00:13:26,140 By the way, did we leave all the food on the bus? 271 00:13:26,264 --> 00:13:30,143 Let's talk about food for a second. Food for thought. 272 00:13:30,226 --> 00:13:31,811 Yeah, that's what I had for breakfast, 273 00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:33,580 and I think that's probably why I'm still hungry. 274 00:13:33,604 --> 00:13:38,860 Hunger. Hunger for victory. Hunger for honor, hunger for pride. 275 00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:40,570 Hunger for hamburgers. 276 00:13:40,695 --> 00:13:42,280 Hunger for chicken chimichangas. 277 00:13:42,363 --> 00:13:43,489 Right, Darryl? That's good. 278 00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:48,077 Exactly. Now, do you know what the civil war soldiers were hungry for? 279 00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:51,497 Pride. Now, each battalion had its own flag, 280 00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:53,381 and they guarded these flags with their lives. 281 00:13:53,416 --> 00:13:57,879 Colonel Harrison jeffords of the 4th Michigan infantry 282 00:13:58,004 --> 00:13:59,922 saw his flag being carried away, 283 00:14:00,089 --> 00:14:02,050 chased it down with nothing but a sword, 284 00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:07,305 fought tooth and nail at the foot of that flag until he died. 285 00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:09,610 He wasn't about to let them have that flag. 286 00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:12,977 Pride. Right, guys? 287 00:14:15,438 --> 00:14:19,359 I commissioned this flag for dunder Mifflin. It cost me $200. 288 00:14:19,776 --> 00:14:21,027 Only $200? 289 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:25,823 We are all branches on this tree. And from the tree comes paper. 290 00:14:26,115 --> 00:14:30,328 We're all part of a business, but business is war. 291 00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:32,288 What's that I hear? 292 00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:37,126 Oh! A rebel paper company is coming to take our flag. 293 00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:39,629 What's going on here? Whee-hoo! 294 00:14:39,837 --> 00:14:43,591 Come and get it! Who's going to get the flag? Who's getting it? Whoa, hey! 295 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:46,528 Don't look where I am, look where I'm going. Jerk right, jerk left, jerk... 296 00:14:46,552 --> 00:14:48,846 Andy, this is inappropriate. People died here, man. 297 00:14:49,097 --> 00:14:52,016 Get the flag, get the flag! Come on, big tuna. 298 00:14:52,183 --> 00:14:54,578 What are you going to do about it? We've got a flag right here! 299 00:14:54,602 --> 00:14:55,603 Whee-hoo! 300 00:14:57,522 --> 00:15:00,274 Spangler's spring is a mile this way. 301 00:15:00,358 --> 00:15:05,655 Oh, wow. So, that's two miles if you incorporate the walk back. 302 00:15:07,281 --> 00:15:09,951 It's... I mean, come on. 303 00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:12,286 Oh, I don't think I should walk anymore. 304 00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:14,622 All I had for breakfast was oatmeal, 305 00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:18,167 yogufl, cofiee, orange juice and toast. 306 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,587 Two poached eggs and then that half a sandwich on the bus. 307 00:15:21,671 --> 00:15:22,672 I can't. 308 00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:24,424 All right, fine. You know what? 309 00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:25,984 I guess this place just hasn't rubbed off 310 00:15:26,008 --> 00:15:27,448 on you the way that I hoped it would. 311 00:15:29,512 --> 00:15:34,392 I'm still going, and I'm not going to ask anymore. 312 00:15:35,059 --> 00:15:36,561 I'm not even going to look back, 313 00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:38,446 I'm just going to assume that you're with me. 314 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:49,365 You said you weren't going to look back. 315 00:15:52,201 --> 00:15:53,786 And why is blackrock 316 00:15:53,870 --> 00:15:58,624 suddenly the paragon by which all hedge funds must now be compared? 317 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:00,918 Yeah, I don't know. 318 00:16:01,169 --> 00:16:03,629 Right? I mean, you're an accountant, 319 00:16:03,713 --> 00:16:06,674 those bogus prospectuses must drive you insane. 320 00:16:07,550 --> 00:16:11,220 Yes, I am an accountant. 321 00:16:12,054 --> 00:16:15,141 Dwight, this is one of the archivists here. 322 00:16:15,224 --> 00:16:17,059 I thought maybe we can consult him. 323 00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,227 Yeah. Really? 324 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:21,856 Well, anyone employed by the gettysburg industrial complex 325 00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:23,524 is certainly going to want to keep quiet 326 00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,234 about the battle of schrute farms. 327 00:16:25,526 --> 00:16:27,487 Schrute farms, did you say? 328 00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:30,823 That is a fascinating little chapter of the civil war. 329 00:16:30,907 --> 00:16:31,991 You've heard about it? 330 00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:36,454 Yes! Ha! Prepare to be refuted. Go on, come on. 331 00:16:37,288 --> 00:16:38,331 There you go. 332 00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:41,894 Narrator: Families and sweethearts back home 333 00:16:41,918 --> 00:16:44,295 waited desperately for letters from the front. 334 00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:49,091 Man: "Dearest mother, I'm sorry it has been so long since my last letter. 335 00:16:49,175 --> 00:16:51,761 "It is three months since I arrived at schrute farms, 336 00:16:51,928 --> 00:16:56,641 "and I fear! May never leave this place alive. Melvyn fifer garris." 337 00:16:57,183 --> 00:16:58,643 Hallowed ground. 338 00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:02,188 Narrator: But the battle at schrute farms was no battle at all. 339 00:17:02,271 --> 00:17:05,816 It was a code used by pacifists from both north and south, 340 00:17:05,900 --> 00:17:07,419 who'd turned the Pennsylvania farmhouse 341 00:17:07,443 --> 00:17:10,738 into an artistic community and a refuge from the war. 342 00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:14,534 You have to understand, poets, artists, dancers, 343 00:17:14,951 --> 00:17:17,745 these kinds of men preferred peace to war. 344 00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:21,541 These delicate, lovely men found a place of refuge 345 00:17:21,624 --> 00:17:23,584 among the schrutes of schrute farm. 346 00:17:23,668 --> 00:17:26,295 Amidst the macho brutality of war, 347 00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:30,883 this was a place where dandies and dreamers could put on plays, 348 00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:33,219 sing tender ballads and dance in the moonlight. 349 00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:37,473 I like to think of schrute farm as the underground railroad 350 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:41,435 for the sensitive and, well, fabulous. 351 00:17:42,478 --> 00:17:45,147 Wow, this is so much better than the story you made up. 352 00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:47,024 I've seen enough. 353 00:17:47,149 --> 00:17:49,069 You're right, there should be a monument to this. 354 00:17:49,652 --> 00:17:53,155 Never trust a cookie with a woman's name. 355 00:17:53,823 --> 00:17:58,160 Pecan Sandy. Lorna doone. Madeleine. 356 00:17:59,704 --> 00:18:01,372 They'll just break your heart. 357 00:18:04,709 --> 00:18:06,502 Kevin, you are... 358 00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:10,089 Robert, I hate to interrupt, but I would love to pitch you one last idea. 359 00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,717 I call it the big Mac idea. 360 00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:14,302 What? No. 361 00:18:14,385 --> 00:18:15,845 Big Mac idea. Sounds encouraging. 362 00:18:16,012 --> 00:18:18,306 It's really, really good, Robert. Let me explain. 363 00:18:18,389 --> 00:18:20,725 No, this is not fair. This is my idea. 364 00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:23,519 He's trying to steal it because he's jealous of me. 365 00:18:25,062 --> 00:18:26,439 Well, what is the idea? 366 00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:31,193 Every time you buy a big Mac, you set one ingredient aside. 367 00:18:31,736 --> 00:18:36,324 Then, at the end of the week, you have a free big Mac. 368 00:18:36,407 --> 00:18:40,202 And you love it even more, because you made it with your own hands. 369 00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:44,957 You know what? Now I remember. That was your idea. 370 00:18:45,041 --> 00:18:47,543 That is 100% your idea. 371 00:18:50,171 --> 00:18:51,839 Oh, my. 372 00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:56,385 It was just actually cookies the whole time. 373 00:18:59,096 --> 00:19:01,057 Damn it. Hey. 374 00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:05,728 You guys came. Where's everyone else? 375 00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:08,522 Back at the bus. We were locked out. 376 00:19:08,606 --> 00:19:10,900 Phyllis is sitting on the ground, eating a dirty sandwich. 377 00:19:11,317 --> 00:19:13,402 Yeah, I asked the bus driver to lock it 378 00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:15,767 because our stuff was in there. I guess he follows orders. 379 00:19:15,905 --> 00:19:18,991 Yeah, sorry everybody else didn't come. I think they're just tired. 380 00:19:19,075 --> 00:19:21,577 With holes in their shoes and their dysentery. 381 00:19:22,370 --> 00:19:24,130 Even without an audience, you're still at it. 382 00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:25,702 What are you talking about? 383 00:19:25,748 --> 00:19:30,086 Our office has a disease, and it goes by many names. 384 00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:34,382 Sarcasm, snark, "wisecracks." 385 00:19:34,715 --> 00:19:36,509 You take things that people care about, 386 00:19:36,592 --> 00:19:39,845 and you make them feel lame about it with yourjokes. 387 00:19:39,929 --> 00:19:41,597 That's what you did with this trip. 388 00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:45,518 Andy, this whole idea of our situation 389 00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:48,020 being just like war, it's just not true. 390 00:19:48,354 --> 00:19:49,939 We just work at a paper company, 391 00:19:50,064 --> 00:19:51,649 and you're our regional manager. 392 00:19:51,732 --> 00:19:55,069 And guess what, man? You don't have to prove anything. 393 00:19:55,152 --> 00:19:58,197 We like you as regional manager. 394 00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:01,242 Andy, if you don't believe me, take a look at what's on my head. 395 00:20:01,617 --> 00:20:03,285 I'm wearing a very pink hat. 396 00:20:03,661 --> 00:20:06,455 I've been getting weird looks all day, because I'm pretty sure 397 00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:08,916 "dm does gb" means something kind of sexual. 398 00:20:09,166 --> 00:20:11,711 But guess who's wearing them? All of us. 399 00:20:11,836 --> 00:20:14,380 Just for you, man. That's huge. 400 00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:17,550 You don't like the hats? 401 00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:18,634 They're terrible. 402 00:20:18,801 --> 00:20:19,802 I hate myself. 403 00:20:20,469 --> 00:20:23,431 They just didn't turn out how I wanted. In my head, they were cooler. 404 00:20:23,514 --> 00:20:24,515 But they do look weird. 405 00:20:25,766 --> 00:20:27,226 Andy: The world will little note 406 00:20:27,309 --> 00:20:29,603 nor long remember the fight that 407 00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:31,981 Jim and I had here at gettysburg. 408 00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:34,775 And that's good, because I was basically wrong. 409 00:20:35,609 --> 00:20:39,447 I wanted my team to be like this army and I was their general, 410 00:20:39,530 --> 00:20:40,966 but I guess it's really just more like 411 00:20:40,990 --> 00:20:43,826 they're people who work in an office and I'm their manager. 412 00:20:45,286 --> 00:20:49,331 Yeah, that's really probably a better analogy. Now that I think about it. 413 00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:54,503 Abe and Mary are seated watching the show. 414 00:20:56,464 --> 00:20:59,508 Oh, Mary, this is wonderful. 415 00:21:00,551 --> 00:21:03,971 Okay, Mary, stop your scolding. I'll be quiet. 416 00:21:05,181 --> 00:21:08,184 I need her like I need a hole in the head! 417 00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:14,023 Mmm. Oh... 418 00:21:15,691 --> 00:21:17,777 Bang!